My mom has always had a her-way-or-no-way attitude which has kind of led me growing up to be a pushover & not able to speak my mind very well... I am 7 months pregnant now & cant drive, we live an hour away from her. My 2 year old daughter is a handful and I love her to bits but I needed a break to rest, so I let my mom take her for the weekend... BUT that was LAST weekend;Tuesday we found a bigger house opening up so we're now in the process of moving, so I let it go without saying anything since my daughter would make this an even bigger ordeal if she were here right then.
Ok, so today I called my mom & asked if she's going to bring Kc back tonight & she flat out says "No" and starts in with how she's looking after my aunt who's eldery & lives with her... she uses my aunt as an excuse for never bringing my daughter back on the day we agree on, but when it come to her picking Kc up, leaving my aunt is never a problem! How do I deal with her, Short of filing kidnapping charges?!
2006-07-03 10:21:41 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
I dont use her as a crutch, but I see your point.
She calls every single week and constantly wants Kc to stay the weekend and this is only the 3rd time I've let her go. When I say no she lays a guilt trip on me by saying things like "I'm just trying to make it easier on you" and "Don't you trust me with her"
2006-07-03 10:46:01 · update #1
Send your husband to go get her immediatelt after work. Then don't let her do weekends anymore. You need to start putting your foot down or she'll just keep rolling over you. But on the same hand, you can't use her as a crutch anytime you get tired. So line up a babysitter now and stop using her for help. Cause if you do keep using her for help, she'll use the help as leverage to force you into decisions you hate.
2006-07-03 10:31:58 · answer #1 · answered by Velken 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just drive. I drove at 7 months pregnant, Angelina Jolie FLIES her plane at 9 months pregnant!!! what's the big deal?
If you don't want her to go, just say no and make up an excuse. If she lays a guilt trip, tell her it is only because she won't ever bring her back when you want her to. Say now you have to go out of your way and drive just b/c she won't. Who cares what she thinks or says? she'll never cut YOU off, you have her grandchild. But you need to put her in her place somehow, she is the one who can lose. Don't let her take your kid anymore. IN my opinion, your kid is too young to be staying with your mom that often anyway. Tell your mom 'it obviously sounds like you have your hands full with auntie, so my daughter won't be staying with you, I don't want to overload you" If she insists, tell her you have plans.
2006-07-03 19:43:01 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi,hope ur good.ok. first you need to let your mom know that she is not your CHILD'S MOM.you are.She is the child's grandma. she should focus more on being KC's grandma and spoil like she ought to.it's not like your not there or has abandoned her. her days of 'parenting are over'so to speak.secondly, maybe she is kind of lonely and mssing you guys.maybe she is regretful of the way she grew u as a child so she's trying to make up for whatever wrong she thought she did.my mother does that kind of thing to me so i just had to tell her one day that when she wants to have natalia for an extended period,she should tell me.sometimes i agree and sometimes i don't. so don't be too hard on her ,but just be brave and let her know how u feel about the whole situation,ok? best wishes
2006-07-03 17:49:25 · answer #3 · answered by tilly 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go and get your daughter!! Then tell your mother how you feel. In the future tell her she cannot pick up your daughter because she never wants to bring her back. If she is truly a pain in the a$$ then you might do better by limiting your interaction with her.
2006-07-03 17:30:34 · answer #4 · answered by C2 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you seriously can't drive and you don't have anyone you could ask for a ride, than bite the bullet and shell out money for a cab ride to pick her up. than never let your daughter leave with your supervision with your mother again.. It sounds like shes totally trying to take over mom status..
2006-07-03 21:45:07 · answer #5 · answered by ashez 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Can't you go pick her up? Maybe you should take someone along with you, then if she doesn't comply you can tell her you are serious. In the future I would hire a babysitter rather than have her give you a break. Sounds like too much stress.
2006-07-03 17:25:50 · answer #6 · answered by KMP 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is this your mothers first grandchild? My first daughter was the first grandchild, and both grandparents cluck-clucked around her like nesting chickens, constantly. I expected this and tolerated it. They were somewhat less clucky with my second daughter (I expected this also) and they will, I expect, be a whole lot less clucky around my wifes two other sisters when they start having babies as well to add to the 'dog pile' of grandkids.
2006-07-03 19:32:37 · answer #7 · answered by John M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I suggest you be careful. I am currently battling my own grandmother over guardianship of my son. After his father passed away I asked for her help and she took legal actions to try and gain guardianship of him!! Now I am entangled in a huge legal dispute (she hired a lawyer so I hired a lawyer) It is ugly and hurful so just watch out. Some people mistake love with obsession!!
2006-07-03 17:27:01 · answer #8 · answered by angellovesryan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let her know that she is your daughter and when you say it is time to come home then that means to bring her home but be polite because she still is your mother.
2006-07-03 17:29:07 · answer #9 · answered by nay_cash 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm a Great-GrandParent of 2 darling girls .
My Mom is 87, the GGGrandmother!!! ~
We love the girls & can't get enough of them..
But YOU, the Mommy have a right to say "when"...
Don't cut ties, please. Grandparents truly love those babies and have a lot of experience to share...Choose what you agree with~
2006-07-03 18:08:10 · answer #10 · answered by Merry 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋