I have a really good guy friend at college, we've been friends for like 4 years now, and in the last year we've just taken to contacting each other quiet a bit and done 'friendly' flirting, we have stayed talking till like 1/2am quite a bit, and now my feelings for him have crossed over the just friends boundary. I don't want to ruin my friendship with him, but its starting to really get me down lately. Another thing is that i found out that he fancies someone although he won't tell me who, which is annoying me. I just don't know what to do anymore.
2006-07-03 10:20:56 · 23 answers · asked by Kath 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Just come out and tell him. If you have known him that long and you are sure how you feel, what have you to lose? If you are not quick he may move on, but on the other hand it could be you he fancies, he's just keeping you guessing. I would never recommend to anyone that they do this normally, but there really is no other way round this, as if you take too long, he may just have other fish to fry. Your friendship should withstand it, if it doesn't then he wasn't a true friend. Whatever happens, I wish you the very best of luck!
2006-07-03 10:27:38 · answer #1 · answered by Tentative1 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if you feel that way about wanting him as a friend only, then leave it at that.
Don't talk so long on the phone. be more casual in being with him
he should be talking to the one he fancies till 1-2am...
its been four years of this and you have finally realized he is not the one for you.
your friendship will not be ruined if he is the man you know he is and the friend you know he is..
2006-07-03 17:30:42 · answer #2 · answered by StarShine G 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
distance changes a lot of things over a period of tiime. But the best way for you to not get annoyed and to stay friends is just to be honest with your feelings. Just let him know whatever happens you hope that you both can remain friends. It sounds like it time to move on as far as a boyfriend though. Good luck
Honesty is the best policy
2006-07-03 17:24:57 · answer #3 · answered by funnyface53 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's hard to be friends with someone you like. Maybe in a subtle way you can ask him if your the person he's interested in or is it someone else. If he says it's you, then take it from there. If he says it's someone else, then tell him you were just kidding. That will relieve both of you from the awkward situation. Then you can decide if you want to continue the friendship or perhaps look to someone else for friendship.
2006-07-03 17:29:08 · answer #4 · answered by juju baby 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tough one. My best suggestion would be:
1.) Make a decision if you want your relationship to develop in that direction.
2.) If you do, and I get the impression you might, then just ask him. Seriously. Just talk to him about it, test the waters, see what's going on with him, then - if all's looking good - just straight out ask him who it is he fancies. Wine and a cosy evening in are the way forward here.
2006-07-03 17:26:07 · answer #5 · answered by The Mighty Spanner 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Um, what's your IQ?
He CAN'T tell you cause you MIGHT freak out! It's YOU! "we've just taken to contacting each other quiet a bit and done 'friendly' flirting" and you talk to 1 to 2 a.m.??????????
Get a pencil and start connecting the dots, cause I did.
2006-07-03 17:25:19 · answer #6 · answered by AdamKadmon 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off you need to think about the importance of this relationship with your friend. ( what is it worth to you too lose him if things don't work out ) once you cross that line that's it ! do you think that this person that he likes is you, and when your on the phone together what do you talk about, do you think he feels the same about you ?( only you know the answers to these questions what is your womens' intuition? . well my advice to you is........... if you value the friendship don't taunt with it . yeah i know that feelings can be a wonderful but they can also lead us down the wrong path.
2006-07-03 17:57:33 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should ask if likes anybody and take it from there. If you know that he likes someone than you should put your feelings to the side. You should wait until he brings up having feelings for you because you do not want to make a** out of yourself.
2006-07-03 17:36:33 · answer #8 · answered by Disha 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you've got feelings for him yo might as well tell him. A real friend wouldn't let it become a problem if he doesn't feel the same. But, it seems like he hasn't grown up if he wont tell you who it is he likes. If it's not you, what's the harm? If it is you, why play games?
2006-07-03 17:27:08 · answer #9 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he won't tell you who he fancies because it could be you,and he is pondering the same question. Just make it a hypothetical question,like what if....good luck to you. Have a wonderful Fourth of July...dimples
2006-07-03 17:30:09 · answer #10 · answered by Dimples 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋