My girlfriend of six months wants to move out and get an apartment in the town where i live now(with my parents) which is where our college is. I have my own reasons to want to move out as well. we are considering getting an apartment across the street from campus, that way we can walk to school, work, the grocery store, the bank, and church, which is all nearby. this will give us an opportunity to practice good financial habits and budgeting, have a more active lifestyle, get real life experience, and have a safety net, so if we fail now we have a place to go, but if we fail at 25, it is harder. my main concern is the tempation of backsliding from a wholesome Christian lifestyle, which we both desire. I am dealing with the financial part myself, and I think we can make it. I'm worried about our relationship moving too fast. I value her so much, and am committed to spending my life with her. We have a mature relation and are good at working our problems out, but can we make it?
2006-07-03 07:25:37 · 18 answers · asked by tehckisnow 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
After seeing some of your answers i think I should clarify. she is having problems with where she is living and wants to move out. the only place she has to go is her dad's, which is an hour away from campus and she will lose her car. the best solution we can come up with is for her to get an apartment here, but she can't afford to do it alone. we each trust the other more than anyone else, so we are the logical choices for roommates. we are not doing this just for the sake of living together, but so that she can still continue her education. I'm not planning to marry her while we are still in college because i'm afraid our families will find it a rash move. this is just a temporary situation that we are planning JUST because of school. also, we definately plan on getting a two-bedroom. we will have rules, but rules do not completely elliminate temptation. (I don't know what a 1 1/2 bath is)
2006-07-03 08:36:54 · update #1
I also feel that this has the potential to strengthen us as Christians if we succeed in living a wholesome lifestyle, because where she is living now, she is forced to have those values, while in our own home, we are making ourselves follow God's will, not because we are told to, but because we choose to. I think this will cause us to grow spiritually more so than being forced to live this way. but, we are not perfect, and while we will be answering to each other, there is no one else to stop us if we both get weak. also, there is no one else that we are close enough to to trust to live with. if i got a room with one of my guy friends, i am living with someone i trust less. thank you for your comments thus far, and i will pray on this matter.
2006-07-03 08:41:34 · update #2
when two Christians who arent married move in together it gives a bad picture to nonChristians, even though you two practice a christian lifestyle. Get to know each other a lil more, take it slow and get married and then you can move in together.
2006-07-03 07:29:50 · answer #1 · answered by luv muh baby 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Get your prenup-type legal agreements out of the way, and be fair to yourself when deciding who gets what, as though you'd prepare yourself for a case against a stranger, for if the love ever were to go sour, that's what she'd be. After the legal agreements are all settled with either of you having nothing to lose but what you've earned to begin with, there can be no downside. In the large stream of things, happiness comes first, love second. You can be happy without love, but many people use it as their only medium to happiness. Treat yourself well, and have ambition. That attracts friends. When you have a good set of friends, and are very successful, you'll find people are magnetically drawn to you. Because to become a success means the upmost in personal improvement. People being drawn to this, you'll probably find that your problems go away more and more until they're practically nonexistant, when you focus on yourself and your progression. Everyone is already written through their own karma. So you'll do what was meant to be done regardless.
2006-07-03 14:35:13 · answer #2 · answered by Answerer 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To be honest with you, i don't suggest it. Temptation between a man and woman go further when living together. Living with your parents until you are financially stable is your best bet. You tend to spend more monery when you live "out on your own" initially. Your Christian values will be compromised, especially if you've only been together for a little while. Take it slow. If it's meant to be, then it will happen and succeed. The real life experience you desire, is not all it's cracked up to be. Trust me! Pray on the matter and see what answer you get.
2006-07-03 14:33:27 · answer #3 · answered by applejack 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes, people can keep their lives pure living together. But, if you are sharing a bed & shower, it will be nearly impossible. The temptations would be endless! So, both of you should get a 2 bedroom place with 1 1/2 bath. This should solve your problem. Each of you should get a roommate.
2006-07-03 14:31:29 · answer #4 · answered by mrsdebra1966 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO DON'T DO IT!!!! Being a christian I know the temptations. You are in school, u know sex would be available all the time if u move in together. U DON'T NEED KIDS WHILE IN SCHOOL!!! (accidents happen u know) Enjoy being single and free while u can, after school real life kicks in. Wait until school is over. Of course marriage is an idea but months is way too early for that. Slow down and take it easy. You will be glad you did.
2006-07-03 14:30:19 · answer #5 · answered by dan 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As soon as the marriage certificate is signed. Thats when you should move in together! Not before!
If concern is $$ and safety in your housing choices..then obviously you are already committed to one another, why not go ahead and make it official before joining two lives?
Best of luck to you!
2006-07-03 14:55:18 · answer #6 · answered by AccountableLady 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most couples who move in together find that it was a mistake. It's great in the beginning, but it becomes harder after awhile. They say it's better to move in with each other the day you are married.
2006-07-03 14:27:51 · answer #7 · answered by Truth Hurts 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
six months is quick to move in together. its better to have your own place for a while, but then again i dont really know you guys. you could always get a two bedroom and have seperate rooms. that might help
2006-07-03 14:29:27 · answer #8 · answered by Mike is me 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont think that you should get a apartment together beacause she may break up with you.its just best to get an house with if you get married.Hope your relastionship goes good.
2006-07-03 14:31:38 · answer #9 · answered by wdog 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can tell you from my experience that EVERY couple I know who lived together before marriage has gotten a divorce. Every. Single. One.
2006-07-03 14:35:50 · answer #10 · answered by g14copswife 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋