Am I fat? What is wrong with me?

Question

My parents say I'm fat. Then they say I'm not. (According to them, I'm also stupid and forgetful.) My friends say I'm not fat, but I think they're just trying to make me feel better. I'm 11 years old, 5 feet, and at least 106 pounds. I throw up twice a week. What's wrong with me? Why can't I just be the daughter my parents always wanted?

Answer 1

First- You are only 11. If I were your mom (come to think of it, I'm practically old enough to be...UGH!!), I wouldn't be so harsh- no "fat", no "stupid", no "forgetful". Kids your age are hard enough on themselves, they don't need Mom and Dad telling them they're crap.

From the numbers you gave, you may be a little heavy, but if you have large bones, you're just fine. Again, you are only 11. No need to get too worried. I'm 5'3" and 125, looking good.

I think your friends are right in saying what they say, even if it is just to make you feel better- with the crap your parents are saying, you need some kind of positive in your life.

Eat healthy food, healthy portions- quit when you feel satisfied... and PLEASE don't throw up on purpose- it will damage your esophagus, teeth, etc.

As far as being the daughter your parents always wanted...
1) I have WORDS for your parents, and they have little to do with who you are and what kind of person you are or will become. (And I don't think they would like what I have to say..)
2) Easier said than done, I know, but... Ignore what your parents say. They only have to live with you for another... 7 or 8 years, right? You will have to live with you for the rest of your life. Become someone you can love and respect.

Answer 2

You are not fat. Since you are 11 years old and already 5 feet tall , You may be getting a little extra around the belly from what you normally have and that is perfectly normal for you. You are getting ready for a growth spurt and puberty.

Please do not feel as if throwing up is something that will help you to be the weight that you want to be. It will only make you have problems with your teeth, your esophogus and your self esteem.

Love yourself and the way that you are. You have no one to please with the way you look but yourself. Self confidence is the most attractive thing in the world!

Your body will be going through a lot of changes over the next few years. Give yourself the permission to go through these changes, and nourish your body with good food and praise for yourself.

Best of luck to you!

Answer 3

First off, your parents shouldn't belittle you like that. If you are stupid, what are they? You are a product of THEM. You are not fat by any means and shouldn't be throwing up at all. That could be the start of bulimia. A Lot of times parents are unhappy with themselves as people and unfortunately take it out on their kids. It isn't right or fair, but it happens. Talk to a school counselor or a trusted friend's parent about this. You shouldn't have to endure this. I am 28 and a mother of two. I know the damage that this kind of thing does, as my husband's parents treated him the same way growing up.

Answer 4

Tiger, I am very sorry to hear that your parents say mean things to you. This is abuse, even if they don't hit you. Can you talk to a school counselor about this? It would be best if your whole family could get into family therapy. If that can't be worked out, I hope you will get into therapy for yourself.

106 pounds is about right for 5 feet tall.

Why do you throw up? Do you make yourself throw up? Either way, you should see a doctor. If your parents go in to see the doctor with you, tell the doctor you want to talk to him/her alone. When you are alone with the doctor, tell him/her about the way your parents abuse you and that you want to see a counselor or therapist.

Good luck, Tiger. Remember, you're smart and strong like a Tiger!! GROWL!!!!!

Answer 5

if u r 5 ft and 11 and weigh 106 pounds then u r healthy average weight for your age is 95 pounds and avarage height is 4 8 so u r probley perfect. do u throw up on purpose? if u arent the same thing happened to me and the doctor said it was because of stress. maybe u need to talk to your freinds r somthing i am 13 and my sister is 11 she is going through the same thing if u r going through pubirty it isnt good for u to be throwing up and weighing a little more than your average body weight is ok. try not to throw up try eating 6 small meals a day instead of 3 big meals because thats what the doctor told me to do. try to calm down if u want to talk to me email me at [e-mail] GOOD LUCK FEELING BETTER!!

Answer 6

you are tall for your age. I'm 28 and 5ft tall. the Ideal body weight for 5ft female is 100 lbs. (for 18 and older) however you are 11 yrs old. you sound perfectly healthy to me. Your parents might say things when they are mad at you and don't mean it. They might be scared you will gain weight and become ill. Eat healthy food, exercise and stop throwing up on purpose. You are special and nothing is wrong with you. You aren't fat. When I was a little girl, I worried about the same things. You are a beautiful person. Don't worry anymore!

Answer 7

Honey, no parents are perfect. Sounds like they are taking anger out on you for no reason. It is NOT YOUR FAULT! You should try to stay happy, and ignore their negative comments to you. You should try talking to them about it, and tell them you hate when they call you names and you want it to stop. It is not fair to you to grow up like that. I did, and I'm fine now, but my head was so messed up from all the negativity and I felt bad about myself for a very long time. I had to learn confidence and how to defend myself and actually tell people how they made me feel instead of keeping it bottled up inside.

If you don't you will explode and you deserve more than that- you are 11. See what your parents say when you confront them, and be serious. If they also take it serious they will change and not hurt you anymore. If they keep it up, tell a couselor at school who can help you deal with it. It will help- I had to do it. Try to hang around people who make you feel good all the time and are honest with you, like your friends.

Good luck.

Answer 8

Sweetheart it's not you. Even if you were fat, good and loving parents encourage there children when they see a problem in their child's life. Bad parents break a child's self esteem and make them into a depressed and mentally ill adult. Look in the mirror and tell yourself that you are beautiful and worthy to be loved. When you 18 move out and have the best life ever.

Answer 9

Sounds a little complicated. There must be more to this than what you say. You are not fat. Stupid?, Forgetful? Nauseous?
You are the daughter that your parents always wanted, get used to it.

Answer 10

You eat too much food...you are the victim of American diets. Stop the barfing stuff, cut out all the junk food, (candy, sodas, McDonald's, cookies), and eat a carrot, celery or fruit instead. and go outside and play, walk, ride your bike, and go hungry once in awhile!!!!!!! It will melt off of you like in no time. If you need more help, get your parents to take you to the dr. and get on a diet you yourself can fix everyday this summer. When school starts again, eat half of what you ate last year.