I always pick out of the crowd men who are abusive, depressed or lack total self esteem. How do I change this cycle. I just want to find a normal man.
2006-07-02 19:04:59 · 27 answers · asked by ? 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
quit being superficial. look at the personality then the person.
2006-07-02 19:07:27 · answer #1 · answered by bones54 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
You need to try to avoid the ones that are popular,they can have their choice and will cheat on you.Avoid picking up guys in bars or who drink and party all the time or do drugs because they are the abusive ones.Try looking for the average guy and find one that loves you for who you are.Do not get seriously involved until you really know the person.watch the guys and pick the ones that really have a heart,one that enjoys helping others,one that plays with the children,one that volunteers his time to help others,and maybe one that is involved in different organizations in the community.You may even choose one that is not popular at all but does not have a reputation of causing trouble.It is possible that you choose the bad ones because of a certain standard that you look for in a guy.If you have to then lower your standards.Remember to always look into the heart and not an outter apperance.
good luck,I pray that you find the right one for you.
2006-07-02 19:17:13 · answer #2 · answered by jlthomas75844 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I don't know what normal is, but don't expect perfection. I'm a guy and it took me a while to learn that one myself. As for you picking wrong, make sure that you are being yourself when you are around the men you think you might want to date. My sister is a bright woman, but she used to act dumb around guys because she thought that they would like that. I finally noticed what she was doing (I'm seven years younger), and told her how if she acted dumb, she was going to attract dumb guys! She never thought of it that way. If you're smart, funny, or whatever your better qualities are, let them show! I would agree with some of the other suggestions, such as looking hard at yourself and seeing if there is a reason that you are attracted to a kind of person, or being happy with yourself first. Stay single for a while, and work on your own happiness. And remember, you are not the only one- plenty of other women and men have been through the same thing. We just have to learn what qualities we really want from a person, and what compromises we are willing to make.
2006-07-02 19:52:58 · answer #3 · answered by Spillski 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Pick the guy your the least attractive to? Because apparently the ones you are attracted to are abusive, depressed, or lack total self esteem.
2006-07-02 19:07:15 · answer #4 · answered by Tasy 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Time to look in the mirror. You are repeating a cycle that you probably picked up while you were being brought up. The worst thing a good therapist can do is give you some objectivity.
You may think you had a "normal" upbringing--chances are, you didn't (not that anyone's is "normal").
2006-07-02 19:10:58 · answer #5 · answered by ptstrobl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let me know when you find out the answer to this question. I have the same problem. I go for guys that I find physically attractive but they have all turned out to be losers. Uneducated, alcoholics, drug-users, money issues, no goals, no ambition, poor morals, the list goes on... I have just in sense gave up on looking for a good man because I'm convinced he isn't out there.
2006-07-02 19:10:16 · answer #6 · answered by UnderGrad Student 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
STOP DATING!!! For a while. Find that enter peace....Once you find happiness and true love for yourself you'll find the guy you want...Its chemisty....we know whats easy and whats not. Oh, all the girls want the bad guy....why???? Its a self image prob w/ yourself. Just dont go out looking. Do something for yourself that will change life for the good. Then God will bring you the man that you need.
2006-07-02 19:09:37 · answer #7 · answered by eraxpar 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well first thing.... who you pick is a reflection of yourself. Are you depressed? Do you like abuse? Do you have an esteem problem?
If you do fix yourself and the right guys will start picking you.
Next - are you hot? You gotta get hot and the quality guys will hound after you.
And lastly when it comes to clothing remember - LESS IS MORE!
2006-07-02 19:09:13 · answer #8 · answered by curious_ray 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
By convincing yourself that you deserve a man that makes you feel comfortable, a man that is not selfish with his acts.
Read the signs before commiting to a relationship. Give a chance to those ones you wouldn't have given a chance in the first place. You might be surprised.
2006-07-03 03:59:40 · answer #9 · answered by yogmog 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
properly, there is an old conserving, in case you extra usually than not do what you extra usually than not did, then you will continually get what you extra usually than not were given...in case you do not replace the variety of guy you're courting, then you will finally end up interior a similar situation persistently. i comprehend this because i became stuck up in that loop for a lengthy time period. I made the alternative to make it non-negotiable the features that i wanted in a guy. i believe that all of us ought to compromise in a courting, yet we do no longer ought to compromise on personality. you're a woman who feels like she has many particular presents to furnish someone, so why would you agree for something except the desirable? in case you want to discuss this, purely contact me.... i imagine that i might want to help in case you'll enable me. good success.
2016-11-30 04:40:21 · answer #10 · answered by dahle 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A normal man would only want to be with a normal woman....Stop, and take a good look at yourself... If you understand what I'm talking about you have a chance at finding happiness. - Good Luck = Hope you are worth it.....
2006-07-02 19:09:25 · answer #11 · answered by rythempig 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋