i caught my dad looking at porn?

Question

his room is right down the hall from my 11 yr. old brother and i want to make sure my brother doesnt see it and i think its just gross that my dad looks at porn

for the person who said tell my mom i dont have a mom

Answer 1

It's none of your business what your dad does on his computer.

Answer 2

This is a tough situation and one that probably most people on these forums will not have 'the' right answer for. I would recommend talking to your clergy or maybe even a guidance/high school counselor. I could be wrong, but I don't think you should tell your mom YET, because that would potentially cause a huge problem which you could be caught in the middle of. Try talking to someone who is not only professionally trained, but also doesn't have a personal interest/stake in this situation (ie. clergy, school counselor, etc.). They'll be able to provide you with the appropriate advice, or they'd be able to refer you to someone who you can talk to about this.

P.S. And don't listen to these people on here that tell you "to mind your own business", "leave your dad alone," etc. You're dad is an adult and should know better than to be looking at stuff like that when kids are around. Looking at it while he is home alone where there is no risk of you or your brother could see it is one thing, but looking at it while you guys are around is another. In many states (maybe even most), this can be classified as a form of child endangerment or maybe even abuse. People have gotten arrested for this you guys and it's a lot more serious than some of you are taking it as. I'm not a prude by any means nor am I saying that there is anything wrong with porn, but it is wrong when someone puts their kids at risk like that.

Answer 3

Honey, this is a very difficult matter for you I am sure. But - it is also an opportunity for you to grow.

The unhappy news is that most men like to see porn. Men are visual and the sight of porn is exciting to men.

I don't mean to sound crass, but especially if you don't have your mother, porn may be a way for your father to find sexual release. Look at it this way; would you rather have a wicked step-mother?

If your brother is eleven then he has more than likely seen porn - whether in a magazine or a movie.

You sound like a very sweet girl and a responsible one, but it would be helpful if you could realize that you are not responsible for what your dad does and that you are not responsible for the moral protection of your brother.

I believe that it would be best if you just tried to overlook this incident with your dad and allow nature to take its course with your brother.

Good luck and God bless.

Answer 4

Lots of men look at porn, don't worry about it, it is really pretty normal. It doesn't mean anything except that he has a normal, healthy libido.
Some women have a huge problem with their man looking at porn, so think long and hard if you want to tell your mom and to stir up trouble between your parents; to me it is not worth it.

I would probably just try to forget what you saw, and consider it his private business. He's over 21 and works hard to support your family, let him have his harmless fun.

Answer 5

JEEZ. Tell your dad to stop doing that maybe? Tell him your reason why. Don't do it though if he is abusive. Remember, porn, like drugs, is addictive, so he might need professional help from a therapist (no offense). hope this helps, as this is a serious problem!

Also talk to a school counselor, like Drew said. It seems he is the only person here who has said something truly smart!

Lots of people say its normal to look at porn, but it is not normal if he constantly looks at it. If you see him being in the computer and suggests something of the sort of being addicted to it, get some help, because it is NOT normal to be addicted to porn. Being attracted to the opposite sex is normal, but what is in porn nowadays is not normal, and it can pervert people seriously. This leads to my other point. besides the problem of your dad becoming possibly addicted, your brother seeing it is a bigger problem. Since he is young, he is not mature enough to understand porn, and what is right and wrong in it. His mind can be more easily manipulated, and he can become addicted to it easily, and most likely get the wrong ideas from it. Believe me, I have seen it happen. I myself am a 13 year old guy, and have been exposed to those sorts of things. Thankfully I did not really suffer like one of my friends, who spends nearly the whole day watching it, and you should see what he says and does, because of that. Porn, if exposed to immmature people, is shown to make men depreciate women, and decreases socialization between the victim and other people. I hope your brother is having sex-ed though, because that would greatly help if he does walk into your dad doing that, just like you did

I may sound one-sided, but it is true. I want to emphasize that I am not saying sexuality is bad, or that attraction of people to the opposite sex, or any of that sort. I am just saying that addiction to porn or being exposed to it without being properly briefed can have its consequences.

Also, like Drew said, putting the children in danger of seeing that is incorrect. Like I stated, it can pervert thier minds!

P.S. You all who are just saying "it's not your business" or "lighten up" should just shut up! You are not helping at all, and may even be hurting the situation. It is completely incorrect, like Drew said, to put the children in danger like that. You all are the ones who should grow up!

Answer 6

Lmao well considering that your dad is an adult it is his right. If it offends you alot you can talk to him though it might be a tad embarrassing. If you are worried about your brother seeing it just remember most boys see it by the time they are 14 yrs old. Its the information that they receive about it that effects how they handle it. good luck to yah

Answer 7

I think I'd find some way to nonchalantly let your dad know that you caught him- and see if that doesn't make him a little more discreet.

He's a man and it's rather normal for him. But he should be a little more discreet then to let you or your sibling know what he's doing. You shouldn't need to be the one to tell him, but someone probably should- "Please, shut the door to your room while you're doing that."

Answer 8

He's an adult. It's normal. It's legal. It's none of your business.

If you feel you must say something anyway, tell him you thought he should know that you accidentally saw him looking at it and that you thought he might want to know so your younger brother won't be the one to have that same accident, next time.

Answer 9

well he may have actually found the porn in your 11 yr old brother's room...and then he was just doing is fatherly duty and checking it out to see what he was watching.

Answer 10

So let the old man have some fun. I'm sure ya'll took the fun out of his life years ago. He works and pays the bills let him do whatever.

Answer 11

As long as it's not kiddie porn, what business it is of yours? He's a grown adult. He gets to make his own decisions.