Troubled 7 year old...possible eating disorder?

Question

Hi, I want some advice on how to handle my daughter's problem. She is 7 and thinks she is overweight and shouldn't eat....can somebody offer me some advice on this subject. I offer her healthy choices and she always says NO....

Answer 1

My sister has an eating disorder and I worry about her daily.

Are you still married? It's unfortunate, but a daughter gets her self confidence from her father; I know this from a lot of research. Every little girl needs to hear her father say the following simple sentence a million times, "You are beautiful, and you will always be perfect in my eyes". This is like water for a plant. Are you overweight? Do you rationlize about food (be honest with yourself here for your daughter). Is your daughter overweight at the end of the day?

The best blanket advice I can give you is to get you and your daughter in some family counseling. Eating disorders are self-image disorders and are paved with lies and rationalizations. The problem isn't the food, you have to get inside her head to find the problem.

My sister has claimed acid reflux for years now. My sister simply has chipmunk cheeks and can't see past them to her sickeningly skinny skin and bone body.

Good luck and please don't simply pray about this, take the action and get the two of you in joint counseling. Get her in some activities which improve her self esteem. Pay for something outside of school where after some hard work, she will find herself truly good at something impressive which she cam then later share at school. I promise this will also pay off in her self image. School is so critical, outside of school is an area of open arms.

Answer 2

Sometimes young children do feel this way, and its very unfortunate. I know that the first time I tried not to eat was when I was 8. And when I tried to limit my diet to just bread and salad i might have been 7. It's important that you take care of this now because with me, eating disorders are still an issue because of the way I started to view my body then.
She probably didn't come to see herself this way on her own. Are there bullies at school or any one else that tease her or call her fat? My grandmother called my mother fat and now calls me fat. It can be very hurtful to a child's self esteem when someone that they love and trust as much as a grandparent says these things to them.
She also could have started to see herself this way because of the media. If you see models, watch music videos, or just commercials and billboards, women's bodies are not what most of us look like. She could get the message that since she doesn't look like these women and girls she's not pretty enough. The more she watches television the more she's going to get these messages, so monitor how much and what kind of television she watches.
If you sit down at dinner with her with the whole family eating every night, she might fall to eat one of her favourites. If she does eat, make sure you tell her how good it is that she does eat. She could see it as failing in her mission to not eat and try to throw it up. The first time I tried to throw food up was when I was 11, so it does start young.
Try to do healthy activities with her. Take her on a bike ride or on a walk. Maybe she will feel good enough about having gotten some exercise that she will eat. But make sure that she doesn't start to exercise too much. There was a time not that long ago when I would only eat if I had ran 4 miles that day. Exercise addiction can be as bad as any eating disorder.
If this has been going on for a while, I would seek professional help. Therapy can be expensive but I would say here that it is definitely worth it. To develop a negative body image at this young an age is a horrible thing, and can have terrible consequences in the future. Eating disorders wreak havoc upon the body and the mind and take some lives. It's important that you change her body image.
Don't think that the reason this happened is because you're a bad parent. My parents are great and very supportive, but bad things still happen to good families. If you do think the reason is partially because of you, because of your attitude to food or weight, then try yo change that attitude. It will be the best for the both of you.
Good luck!

Answer 3

Who's the parent here? 7 year olds DON'T get choices. If she doesn't want to eat what you sit before her, don't force her, BUT, make that her next meal, and the meal after it until she does eat it. Will it kill her or harm her? No, but it will put the discipline back where it belongs. Some kids don't eat (I had one) for a day or two but always eat when they are really hungry. Don't give in to temper tantrums about food. You are the parent. You prepare the meals. She has a choice--to eat or not. Believe me, she WILL eat when she is hungry and WILL eat what you serve when she is ready. Keep it healthy and she will learn to eat healthy and learn that she will be the "right" weight for her height and build.

Answer 4

Does a family member have a problem with weight or talk about themselves or others needing to lose weight? At this age children pick up everything they see and hear, including the attitudes of others. Does she know anyone who feels they must look perfect all the time? Does she have a favorite actress or singer who is super thin? Is it possible someone her age (friend, sibling, cousin) has told her she is fat?

Regardless of the cause, a trip to the doctor is in order. Make the appointment now.

Answer 5

You need to eat more. Do they math. You eat 900 you burn 600 to 1000. So lets work on the high side. You now have 300 calories to burn. For your size you burn 80 calories an hour by sitting. 80X24 1920. SO if you sat all day you would be short 1620 calories to burn. Be smarter live long and healthy. As said see a doctor if not a couple.

Answer 6

You should take her to a specialist. If she does indeed have a disorder, only a trained doctor with experince in this field can aid you and your family. i wont lie to you, you and your family are in for some rough times. This is the hardest thing a parent has to do, but you must force her to get help, especialy if she wont admitt she has a problem. Nip this in the butt know and it will be easy to deal with in the future. There is no cure all for these types of disorders. The only why you can help your daughter is to get her help. i ight also suggest that you and your family seek counsleing to help all of you deal with this problem.

Answer 7

I've taught kids this age, and anorexia and bulemia defiantely can start this early. Make an appt for your daughter with her prediatrician, who will talk to her about her weight, eating, and health. Then, if necessary, he/she will recommend counseling.

Make sure you model positive behavior in front on your child. Are you or your spouse (or older siblings) always dieting, obsessing about food, etc.? Do you make fun of chubby friends or classmates? Even when you think she's not listening, she is!

Answer 8

See a doctor. My mom thought I was too skinny when I was a kid and the doctor weighed me and gave me a physical and told her no I was right in the zone, so not to worry. Maybe your daughter needs to be told the same thing. And, if she is overweight, the doctor will suggest a good diet.

Answer 9

Hard question without having a clear idea where this self image idea has surfaced from, or even if it actualy is a self image thing and not somthing she is parroting back from another source. If it were me I would get out her birth health book with healthy age/height/weight charts and try to sway her about what is considered 'normal'.

Answer 10

Seriously, at seven years old ..I would take her for counseling..One on one..This could be a start of something emotional disorders..She may hereing stuff from older kids..try to keep her away from kids that are 11 + ..try having her with kids 5- 10 yr olds..