i have a 2 year old daughter. when she doesn't do what she is told my hubby and i place her in time out. this consists of her sitting on the first stair inside our house for two minutes. this usually calms her down and she is then willing to do what she was asked.
however, sometimes she just starts slapping her hand! for example: i can ask her to put her toys away, if she doesn't want to do it she yells, "no" at me and slaps her own hand, not once but a few times! we have ignored her when she does this behavior but soemtimes my hubby just has to tell her to not do it. even sitting on the stair for time out she will slap herself.
any suggestions as to why and how i get her to stop doing this? there's a little more to it than this ... my ex-hubby, her bio-father, used to have visitations and i suspect he slapped her on her hand and said, "naughty" when she did something wrong. i suspect this since my Now hubby and i dont use "naughty" ....
does this make sense??
2006-07-02 10:08:19 · 7 answers · asked by timpoops 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
My son went through this for about 2 months. We have never hit him either, so it wasn't learned. We just pretty much ignored it and it stopped. Don't let her see that it is getting to you.
2006-07-02 10:13:30 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Consider that she's trying to communicate something to you, and that at this stage in her journey, her new technique is the only way she knows how to express it.
Have you asked her — both at the time of the behavior, and at a later time when things are joyfully and all feels well in the world — why she does it? The key is to ask without having a "right answer" in mind. Just let her talk without judging what she says (even though some of what she says might hurt a bit).
Kids need help learning to communicate complex thoughts and feelings. Your free, loving attention helps her to bumble through the process, and slowly find new, more effective strategies for communicating the complex feelings she wants to share.
Hang in there! I've been through this one too.
2006-07-02 19:14:59 · answer #2 · answered by united 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes children "escalate" their behavior in order to have you cave in and take the punishment away. Our daughter did this when she was around the same age. She would throw herself on the tile floor and bang her head. We simply picked her up and placed her on her bed and told her when she was done with her tantrum, she could come out and join us again. She never got the response she wanted so she eventually gave up the practice. Children often try to test us to see what will happen. Don't give in and don't give it a lot of attention and it will likely stop.
2006-07-02 18:59:36 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Makes perfect sense and you are correct in believing she is just recreating the past teachings.
She is telling you something here ... by the way .... she misses her real dad (have no idea if she should or not) but she is trying to show you what she feels is the correct way to "teach" her ... in turn she is trying to teach you what she has learned about discipline.
She sounds very bright but very confused.
2006-07-02 17:15:01 · answer #4 · answered by sam21462 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would take her to her doctor and let him/her know of the situation. I would maybe say it is her way of remembering getting into trouble with the ex....I would take her to see her doctor before she starts hitting more than her hand.
2006-07-02 17:13:06 · answer #5 · answered by maureen 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your over reactaing it called getting attention she hits herslef, your like " AHHH" poor baby we can't get mad at you have a candy. Hell I'm 19 get frustrated and hit myself she wants attention and it works, I'm guessing.
2006-07-02 17:22:21 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you or your husband hit her when she does something wrong she is just imitating what she sees!!
2006-07-02 17:13:33 · answer #7 · answered by justme_248 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋