Blonde daughter (15) with a soon to be?

Question

red butt, (not violent dad just pissed) came home from a stay over with her girlfriends with a shaved head, 4 of them did it. I am livid and mom said let it go just kids. Have any of your kids done this? am so embarrassed to take her anywhere...humm

Answer 1

It's hair it can grow back, how is her grades? Is she running the streets? Any change in habits (besides haircutting)?
Is what i'd be conserned about, if you have a good relationship with her and she talks to you and isn't in alot of trouble and such, hey then your doing a good job.

Answer 2

Let her deal with it. If she's like any fifteen year old, she's really embarrassed about it and just can't wait for her hair to grow back out. And if she's not embarrassed, then good for her because she's more confident than the average fifteen year old.

But I don't suggest just letting it go. You need to sit her down and explain to her that she can't just bring little surprises home like a shaved head. If this is clearly against the rules in your home, then you need to place consequences such as grounding or extra chores.

That's your house and if you just keep letting things slide when she's 15, she'll keep pulling bigger stunts, and you won't really have the footing to do anything about it.

Take this from me because I'm a 17 year old girl so I obviously I wasn't 15 very long ago. My father makes it very clear what the rules are, and that I'm free to change those rules when I move out or get married.

On the other hand, I've seen friends of mine break blatant rules, then justify it, get away with it, and use the experience as a passage way to pull even bigger stunts.

I may seem like a party pooper to all teenage girls right now, but she's 15. She doesn't really know what she wants, or what her hair should look like, or if her friends are really her friends...so just help her out through high school because it's a rough time...and if you don't set those rules and enforce them, she'll feel obliged to make crazy decisions like that on her own...she'll give in to peer pressure because she won't be able to tell her friends "oh no, my dad will freak out". It's as simple as that.

Answer 3

Let it go. i did the same thing when I was young. Dads like their daughters to look like girls, and you're just having an issue because of it. Trust me, with the ribbing she'll get from the other kids she knows, it won't happen again. Take her to the mall a lot, and to hang out with other girls in the area. Make a point to show her where all the lumps and bumps are on her head. And remember, her hair will grow back. I would evaluate her current friends though. Are there any other things that they are doing that your daughter would go along with? Things you may not approve of? And if all else fails, take pleasure in knowing that you are just as big an embarrassment to her as she is to you. Next time her friends are over wear your rattiest clothes and belch a lot, or crop dust them. Public butt scratching is also a great method of retaliation.

Answer 4

She is only 15, not eighteen. Where did kids get the idea that they were in control of there own lives before they were '18'?? I would restrict her to the house until she either grows more hair or agrees to wear a wig that the price of, will come out of her allowance. She definitely needs to understand that she should have consulted her parents before making such a decision, if for no other reason than out of common curtsy and respect. Where has respect gone, is it a thing of the past?

Answer 5

No spankings at 15 please. It's just hair and will grow back. If you are that concerned about what others think, tell them she is supporting a friend with cancer. The more you react, the more she'll press your buttons. Choose yur battles carefully. Both my daughters did that at 15 and 16. Take pictures. it's fun to show her future boyfriend. Now my daughters are in college with normal hair studying to be an RN and pharmacist. It's time to focus on her future, issues like sex and birth control. You have more credibility because you're a guy. Focus conversations about alcohol, drugs, education. I didn't care about the bald thing and they eventually got tired of the negative attention from others and grew their hair back. With positive attention comes negative attention. She'll learn the lesson. Have a great day. You love her and care about her, now be a dad!!!

Answer 6

well i dont have kids so i cant say they've done that. But i do have to agree with the mom, just let it go, i had my phase when i did some weird stuff to my hair, i never shaved it but i did have blue streaks for a while. and also, dont be embarrassed to take her places shes probably a wonderful girl no matter what her head may look like, so be proud of her for what she does that doesnt involve her hair

Answer 7

It's just hair. The way people treat her with a shaved head will be punishment enough. Sometimes kids just have to learn things the hard way. You'll laugh about it years from now. Granted I would be livid too, but there's nothing you can do about it now, so why be upset?

Answer 8

She's 15 and she's experimenting. Also, where she did it with friends, it's a way of telling the people in her school that she's a part of an in-group. Sort of like a Brownies uniform, but alternative. Don't be angry, it'll grow back. And she's becoming a healthy independent-thinker away from her parents. That's what you want, trust me.

I just wish she'd kept the hair (did she?) and donated it to cancer so that it could be made into a wig for some bald person who doesn't want to be bald.

Answer 9

It's just hair. It will grow back and in the mean time she should be the only one that is embarassed. You have to let them express themselves and find out who they are. At least she didn't do anything permanent. She'll be mad when it starts to grow back but it's at that awkward stage where you can't really do much with it.

Answer 10

I wouldn't be embarrassed. its HER head .she should be the one embarrassed ( she got the reaction she wanted from you didn't she?)
it will grow back
make sure you take her to many ,many places where she has a chance to feel humiliated
do not let her wear a hat- even in the hot sun
I guarantee she will think twice before doing that again