Funny Bushisms: The Funniest, Saddest and Scariest Mangled Statements and quotes by President George W. Bush
Bushisms: Funniest Mistakes, Blunders, Bloopers and quotes by George W. Bush
"Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we." —Washington, D.C., Aug. 5, 2004
"That's why I went to the Congress last September and proposed fundamental—supplemental funding, which is money for armor and body parts and ammunition and fuel." --George W. Bush, Erie, Pa., Sept. 4, 2004
"For every fatal shooting, there were roughly three non-fatal shootings. And, folks, this is unacceptable in America. It's just unacceptable. And we're going to do something about it." —Philadelphia, Penn., May 14, 2001
"There's an old...saying in Tennessee...I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee that says Fool me once...(3 second pause)... Shame on...(4 second pause)...Shame on you....(6 second pause)...Fool me...Can't get fooled again." --George W. Bush to Nashville, Tennessee audience, Sept. 17, 2002, MSNBC-TV --Politex, Sept. 17, 2002, 10 PM
"There's no doubt in my mind that we should allow the world worst leaders to hold America hostage, to threaten our peace, to threaten our friends and allies with the world's worst weapons." --George W. Bush, South Bend, Indiana, Sept. 5, 2002.
"As you know, these are open forums, you're able to come and listen to what I have to say." --George W. Bush, 10.28.03.
"The ambassador and the general were briefing me on the -- the vast majority of Iraqis want to live in a peaceful, free world. And we will find these people and we will bring them to justice." --Washington, D.C., Oct. 27, 2003 "" --George W. Bush, 10.27.03.
"I know something about being a government. And you've got a good one." --George W. Bush, campaigning for Gov. Mike Huckabee, Bentonville, Ark., Nov. 4, 2002
"We look forward to analyzing and working with legislation that will make--it would hope--put a free press's mind at ease that you're not being denied information you shouldn't see." --G.W. Bush, Washington, D.C., April 14, 2005
"I want to thank you for the importance that you've shown for education and literacy." --G.W. Bush, Washington, D.C., April 13, 2005
"Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB-GYNs aren't able to practice their love with women all across this country." —Poplar Bluff, Mo., Sept. 6, 2004
"We spent a lot of time talking about Africa, as we should. Africa is a nation that suffers from incredible disease." —Gothenburg, Sweden, June 14, 2001
"You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test.'' —Townsend, Tenn., Feb. 21, 2001
"We both use Colgate toothpaste." —after a reporter asked what he had in common with British Prime Minister Tony Blair, Camp David, Md., Feb. 23, 2001
"Tribal sovereignty means that; it's sovereign. I mean, you're a — you've been given sovereignty, and you're viewed as a sovereign entity. And therefore the relationship between the federal government and tribes is one between sovereign entities."
—Washington, D.C., Aug. 6, 2004
"I glance at the headlines just to kind of get a flavor for what's moving. I rarely read the stories, and get briefed by people who are probably read the news themselves." —Washington, D.C., Sept. 21, 2003
"I'm the commander — see, I don't need to explain — I do not need to explain why I say things. That's the interesting thing about being president." —as quoted in Bob Woodward's Bush at War
"I am here to make an announcement that this Thursday, ticket counters and airplanes will fly out of Ronald Reagan Airport." —Washington, D.C., Oct. 3, 2001
“The war on terror involves Saddam Hussein because of the nature of Saddam Hussein, the history of Saddam Hussein, and his willingness to terrorize himself." —Grand Rapids, Mich., Jan. 29, 2003
"I saw a poll that said the right track/wrong track in Iraq was better than here in America. It's pretty darn strong. I mean, the people see a better future." —Washington, D.C., Sept. 23, 2004
"We need an energy bill that encourages consumption." —Trenton, N.J., Sept. 23, 2002
"After standing on the stage, after the debates, I made it very plain, we will not have an all-volunteer army. And yet, this week — we will have an all-volunteer army!" —Daytona Beach, Fla., Oct. 16, 2004
"Do you have blacks, too?" —to Brazilian President Fernando Cardoso, Washington, D.C., Nov. 8, 2001
"Now, we talked to Joan Hanover. She and her husband, George, were visiting with us. They are near retirement—retiring—in the process of retiring, meaning they're very smart, active, capable people who are retirement age and are retiring."
—Alexandria, Va., Feb. 12, 2003.
"This foreign policy stuff is a little frustrating." —as quoted by the New York Daily News, April 23, 2002
"I wish you'd have given me this written question ahead of time so I could plan for it…I'm sure something will pop into my head here in the midst of this press conference, with all the pressure of trying to come up with answer, but it hadn't yet….I don't want to sound like I have made no mistakes. I'm confident I have. I just haven't — you just put me under the spot here, and maybe I'm not as quick on my feet as I should be in coming up with one." —President George W. Bush, after being asked to name the biggest mistake he had made, Washington, D.C., April 3, 2004
"The really rich people figure out how to dodge taxes anyway." —explaining why high taxes on the rich are a failed strategy, Annandale, Va., Aug. 9, 2004
"...that's just the nature of democracy. Sometimes pure politics enters into the rhetoric."
-George W. Bush, Crawford, Tx., August 8, 2003
"Security is the essential roadblock to achieving
the road map to peace."
-George W. Bush, July 25, 2003
..."It's very interesting when you think about it, the slaves who left here to go to America, because of their steadfast and their religion and their belief in freedom, helped change America."— George W. Bush, Dakar, Senegal, July 8, 2003
"My plan reduces the national debt, and fast. So fast, in fact, that economists worry that we're going to run out of debt to retire." —radio address, Feb. 24, 2001
"See, free nations are peaceful nations. Free nations don't attack each other. Free nations don't develop weapons of mass destruction."
—Milwaukee, Wis., Oct. 3, 2003
"But all in all, it's been a fabulous year for Laura and me." —summing up his first year in office, three
months after the 9/11 attacks,
Washington, D.C., Dec. 20, 2001
"I try to go for longer runs, but it's tough around
here at the White House on the outdoor track. It's
sad that I can't run longer. It's one of the saddest things about the presidency."
—interview with "Runners World," Aug. 2002
"Can we win? I don't think you can win it." —after being asked whether the war on terror was winnable, "Today" show interview, Aug. 30, 2004
"I just want you to know that, when we talk about war, we're really talking about peace." —Washington, D.C. June 18, 2002
"Perhaps the biggest problem is that we have passed children from grade to grade, year after year, and those -- child hadn't learned the basics of reading and math." —Washington, D.C., Jan. 8, 2003
"One year ago today, the time for excuse-making has come to an end." - —Washington, D.C., Jan. 8, 2003
"I think the American people—I hope the American—I don't think, let me—I hope the American people trust me." -—Washington, D.C., Dec. 18, 2002
"I trust God speaks through me. Without that, I couldn't do my job." —to a group of Amish he met with privately, July 9, 2004
"I don't bring God into my life to—to, you know, kind of be a political person." --Interview with Tom Brokaw aboard Air Force One, April 24, 2003
The law I sign today directs new funds and new focus to the task of collecting vital intelligence on terrorist threats and on weapons of mass production." --George W. Bush, White House, Nov. 27, 2002
2006-07-02 03:52:42 · 12 answers · asked by WORD UP G 1 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Wow... how did you fit that into 1000 characters... O_O
Now, I'm not sure if this is bush or not, might be al gore:
1. "I'll make sure everyone in America has above-average payments."
2. "I'm going to turn this country around 360 degrees!"
Reasons why they're funny:
1. If everyone has higher payments, the average will also go up...
2. If he turns it around 360 degrees, it'll just keep going in the same direction it's going right now, i.e. towards corruption.
2006-07-02 04:09:47 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 13⤊ 6⤋
"The point now is how do we work together to achieve important goals. And one such goal is a democracy in Germany." —George W. Bush, D.C., May 5, 2006
"That's called, A Charge To Keep, based upon a religious hymn. The hymn talks about serving God. The president's job is never to promote a religion." —George W. Bush, showing German newspaper reporter Kai Diekmann the Oval Office, Washington, D.C., May 5, 2006
2006-07-02 10:58:32 · answer #2 · answered by slackster1998 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow! Brazil is big." —George W. Bush, after being shown a map of Brazil by Brazilian president Luiz Inacio Lula da Silva, Brasilia, Brazil, Nov. 6, 2005
2006-07-02 11:20:37 · answer #3 · answered by iiiis 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
"Wow! Brazil is big." —George W. Bush, after being shown a map of Brazil by Brazilian president Luiz Inacio Lula da Silva, Nov. 6, 2005
2006-07-02 11:07:15 · answer #4 · answered by shashasha 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
this is not really a quote but i loved when he was getting ready for a news conference, while thinking that they were still off the air. some lady out of the camera's shot, was getting on to bush about his hair. after the second complaint, george flipped the bird right in the camera. after they realized they were being filmed, the camera goes black.
2006-07-02 11:06:18 · answer #5 · answered by str8tupgirl 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not a quote but he thinks he's on a mission from god...gods help us.
2006-07-02 11:22:14 · answer #6 · answered by lpaganus 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Wow.....I think you just about summed it all up! I am sure there are more!
2006-07-02 10:57:13 · answer #7 · answered by ? 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
"I'm the decider" not funny, but very scary.
2006-07-02 11:02:10 · answer #8 · answered by sue-sue 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Funniest? You mean dumbest for sure...?
2006-07-02 11:12:43 · answer #9 · answered by lizbabe01 2 · 6⤊ 1⤋
"Gas prices are high, and theres no magic wand to wave," Isn't he the president? Cant he change it when he wants? Duhhhhhhh!
2006-07-02 10:58:18 · answer #10 · answered by *disco_queen21* 1 · 2⤊ 5⤋