my fiance sudenly says i'm gaining too much weight and i need to reduce in size or it will do me 'more harm than good' [as in calling off the wedding].should i be angry or happy he is open to me and wishes to get along with the marriage.
2006-07-02 00:33:54 · 17 answers · asked by Schezor 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Why would you go through with a marriage to someone who doesn't love and accept you as you are? If you were to become pregnant and gain baby weight, would he divorce you for that? It sounds to me like he's way too superficial and doesn't sincerely care for you. Have some self respect and get rid of him. Tell him his shallowness has done him more harm than good.
2006-07-08 09:49:37 · answer #1 · answered by junebug 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would be angry, especially in suggesting calling off the wedding. He makes it sound as if you actually need him and cant get on without him. I would tell him if he ever says it again it will do him more harm then good. My husband would never say something like that to me. He says he loves a girl with some meat on her anyways. If a skinny bag of bones is what he wants then let him go find it. Imagine what he'll say when your pregnant and afterwards when your trying to raise a child and loose the weight. Not a good support system if you ask me.
2006-07-02 09:08:05 · answer #2 · answered by Jenn ♥Cadence Jade's mum♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Personally, if my boyfriend said that to me...I'd walk right out. Planning a wedding is a very stressful thing and the body will react in a variety of ways. Some people lose weight and others gain it. He should be more considerate and not threaten to end the engagement because you've added a couple of pounds.
2006-07-02 20:44:53 · answer #3 · answered by Patricia D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As cruel as it is, if he's not attracted to you as you gain weight, it's better to know that now. It's easy to sit here and say that you love the person inside, but if their outside is repellant to you for some reason, then it may not work out, depending on the person's priorities. If he doesn't still find you attractive simply because there's more to love now, then things will never be right for the two of you. He can't expect your body not to change over the rest of your lives.
2006-07-03 17:02:26 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if he has made it specific that he will call off the wedding just cauz u gained a little weight, ur bound 2 get angry. if he really wanted 2b open, he wud hav just suggested that u shud lose weight in a nice way, showing his concern 2 u. but he ough not 2 b threaghtening u 2 call the marriage off.
but remember, this just cud b his concern 4 u. he really might b just saying that u shud lose weight in order 4 u 2 aviod healthn problems and hav self confidence. find out wat he really means.
also, excersize and eat healthy to lose weight, dont take drastic measures just 2 please him. that wud b sumthin that wud do u more harm thn gud
2006-07-02 07:47:23 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd be angry and now you see what marriage life would be with this jerk. So honey either you stay a size 4 or your marriage is going to be plagued with comments on how fat your *** is. This guy is marrying for what ??? Your weight or who you are. He;s a loser.
2006-07-02 07:36:23 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've read the comments on here and I have to disagree with most.
As awful as his comment sounds at this time, it shows that he cares deeply about you and that he feels comfortable enough in your relationship to be completely honest.
Maybe he meant that it would be harmful to you healthwise, not relationshipwise. Would you rather spend the rest of your life with someone who sugar coats things for you even if it means watching you hurt yourself. Whatever you decide, good luck.
2006-07-02 08:24:14 · answer #7 · answered by ResyG 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u should be angry tell him to go find the song "don't change" by muqic it about a married couple and in the song it say i dont care it u gain wieght or ur hair turns gray just dont change what it means is dont let ur love change and he should feel the same way if he wants to spend the rest of his life with u as long as ur love dont change for him that all he should care about
2006-07-02 08:57:23 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well.... i wouldnt say him being open with you a "happy thing"" but his little threat is one you should be taking into consideration. he should be getting married to you because he loves YOU the person inside not trying to make you some kind of trophy wife. he starts out with this.. whats next? what color your hair should be? where you should be at at all times? it could lead up to him being VERY controlling. I'd seriously start thinking this over before this time next month your stuck in a marrage with him who will never be happy for who you are.
2006-07-02 07:40:44 · answer #9 · answered by Kittie_Nash 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask him if he is marrying you for who you are or for what you have(natural assets).He is going to be a controlling freak once you have said i do.Be sure you want to get into marriage with him.I believe he never had problem with your weight when he first laid eyes on you why now when you are engaged.
2006-07-02 07:45:50 · answer #10 · answered by Shosh-B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋