Our sex life really sucks. I have told her how I feel, but she doesnt even seem to care what my needs are. I would leave but we have 3 kids I love and I dont want to leave them. I find myself looking at other women wanting to be with them. am I bad?
2006-07-01 12:16:01 · 9 answers · asked by flyboy_447 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
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2006-07-01 12:20:02 · answer #1 · answered by Tiyana D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you and your wife needs some down time. If you have 3 children, then she probably is exhausted. She has to care for them, the house and probably you. I don't know if she works or not but I know from experience, that this will drain the life out of a woman. Try helping her around the house, with the kids, fixing dinner and treating her like a queen and I promise you that she will feel loved and the problem will solve itself. She probably feels like she has no energy left for sex or anything else. Men need to understand this. You're lucky that another woman is being honest with you. She needs to feel loved instead of used up by everyone in the house.
2006-07-01 19:52:20 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I'm sure that after 16 years of marriage plus however long you were dating before that, things cool off and aren't as hot as it used to be. But I don't think you should base leaving your wife on your sex life. That's kind of shallow. I know you have your wants and needs, that's not shallow. Yeah, it is kind of bad that you want to be with other people, because you are still married. I would suggest marriage counseling and if you don't want to do that, I would be straight up with her and tell her that her lack of interest in you is making you have wrong desires. If my boyfriend came to me and said "Look. You never want to have sex with me anymore and I've been looking at other girls"...I'd change REAL quick! lol. I think she'd take you seriously if she knew how deep this problem really is.
2006-07-01 19:24:34 · answer #3 · answered by Jenn 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you're not bad, this is your wife's fault. Does she know about these feelings you are now having about other women? Share that with her...bet you get it three times a week and I bet you it will be good again. Ego is a mf, even for women. It sucks that you have to play games with your wife of 16 years but it sounds like she is taking you for granted. The minute she finds out her security may be threatened by another woman she will snap out of her sexual rut.
2006-07-08 19:22:56 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don,t know if you are a bad person, that all depends if you do other women in your own bed. marriages go south for a number of reasons. My wife is an alcaholic and I don,t want to sleep w/her either cuz of the smell of old liquor. I have 2 kids and love them both also, but sooner or later enough is enough and its time to move on.
2006-07-01 19:22:44 · answer #5 · answered by blabeddyblaa 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. It sounds like the blame lies with her, unless she has told you of some medical problem, or that she isn't attracted to you etc...
If I were you, I would tell her point blank that you are going to start hiring high priced hookers to satisfy your needs, if she won't. Then ask if she has a better idea for resolving the problem. I think she will agree it is unreasonable for you to go without sex for a long period of time, for no good reason.
2006-07-01 19:20:43 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
look but don't touch. look when she is not there. but also find out what she is lacking from your relationship. usually when a woman is not interested in sex anymore it is because you are not giving something that she desperately wants outside of the bedroom. alot of women want some romantic connection that does not have anything to do with sex. try finding out or figure it out for yourself what is she missing.
2006-07-01 19:23:08 · answer #7 · answered by jcn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get counselling ASAP if she won't go with you, go without her. you need to decide if the tradeoff is worth it, but I wonder how old she is...could it be menopause? maybe she should see a dr
2006-07-01 19:20:49 · answer #8 · answered by Sharon S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe she is going elsewhere
2006-07-01 19:24:56 · answer #9 · answered by dakey 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋