i live in a very small, conservative town, pop, 160. i have lived here 3 years, with my husband, who has lived here for 38 years(nother story) they dont like "outsiders" here, and i am not accepted. Granted, im nowhere near conservative, swim nude in my pool(no one can see) dress like madonna(at times) have piercings and a tattoo(so?) and the women just seem to plain outcast me. I'm 42, attractive, in good shape. I have a small band and we sing here at my house sometimes. no, we do not party and are not wild. yet, i have heard rumors that i am a whore(no) and the women simply wont befriend me. and if they do at all, it is shortlived(no i dont make passes at their husbands) i am intelligent, outgoing, make a wonderful friend, i'm a helpful person, and i'm great with kids and dogs. what the hell is going on here?
2006-07-01 08:44:51 · 10 answers · asked by sangellai 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
oh, yeah, just last night, i heard that i'm a stripper?(yeah, okay)
2006-07-01 08:45:49 · update #1
you aren't from there and don't have history with them, you are different than they are and therefore they feel threatened by you and make up stories to make themselves feel better. i wouldnt let what they say bother me, people that judge other people when they don't know them do nothing but demonstrate how small minded they are. its like this everywhere, and community type setting the new one is always the target. i relate it this way, i was a bartender at a local bar where nearly everyone was a 'regular' when a stranger did come in oh my goodness, well the same thing happened. just stick to your guns, be yourself and sooner or later it will work out, probably not until there is another new one though. you could try to fit in more, be more like them and then reveal your unique aspects slowly, or you could just say hec with them i don't care what they think. that stuff about being attractive and in good shape probably just makes them hate you more, if you were frumpy and unappealing and therefore non-threatening they'd love you to bits.
2006-07-01 08:54:01 · answer #1 · answered by dappersmom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry to say this but a lot of times people are just afraid of the unknown. From what you described as being a very conservative small town I am sure the people who live there are quite taken a-back by your tattoo and piercings. My suggestion to you would be get involved with some kind of volunteer work in your community, and give the people of your town a chance to get to know the real you and not the outside persona. Get your hubby on board to start entertaining the folks with BB Q's casual dinners etc. Perhaps you might even go to church and meet people there.
I hope this helps you
2006-07-01 12:23:13 · answer #2 · answered by Laurie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not doing anything wrong. It sounds like you and your husband might need to sit down and have a talk about moving out of that town. Granted, your husband's been there for a long time, but if he knows how miserable his wife is, he should put her first rather than 160 people...after all, your his wife, the one he chose to be with for the rest of his life and your happiness should be a top priority for him. Sometimes people are so closed-minded that they cannot accept anyone that is different than them. That is their loss, not yours. After living there for 3 years, it's time you both need to find another place to live. Good luck! I hope you find a better place for you!
2006-07-01 08:55:09 · answer #3 · answered by frajo 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It could be They are Jealous of your lifestyle and are afraid to come out of there shell's or the could just think you are the Devil's Daughter and if your not go visit there Church.
But if you are then i would say it's just you.
And if you cant handle there talking behind your back move if your Husband truly Loves you he will help you deal with this. Small town"s always pick out some one to taunt even when they say they are God fearing people
Be thankful its not 200 years ago they might burn you at the stake because you are different then them.
2006-07-01 08:59:05 · answer #4 · answered by jamnjims 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, you can not worry about those people!! Who the hell are they? You are an attractive 42 year old woman!! They probably dont come close to you!! They all probably had there eyes on your man and there not use to big city livin!! Just chill out, If it depresses you that much have a talk with ya man, and try to move!! But dont let them change you!! Screw them!!
2006-07-01 08:51:32 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
people get caught up in societys standards. its not you, its them. simply put, they're haters. lol in fact, half of the women would probably love to be "you" in regards to your not being so reserved. they have to maintain an image among their peers.... so when in Rome... but I doubt if they're SO "conservative" when no one associated with their current lifestyle is around (like say if they went out of town alone). you know how it goes... you didnt do it if no one knows.... so no its not just you. they're simply jealous haters because you're not bound by your societys standards...and they are. not that they have to be. they chose to be (a long time ago) and now they're stuck..... take it as a compliment. if they're talking about YOU, its ok. all of their talking lets you know some good s**t stay on their minds.. lol
2006-07-01 09:02:06 · answer #6 · answered by mind b 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well sometimes them old prude will just be like that..always worried bout what everyone else thinks..oh well dont let it phase u ..i been here for 3 yrs small town with set in their ways peeps n i am ghetto as hell no blacks here either but maybe 3 so i say i dont care what they think of me ...i aint changin fo no one..i got my man n family so who cares...i apologize for nothing.
2006-07-01 08:52:08 · answer #7 · answered by devil_queen_biatch14 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think that the people in that town hasnt got to know you yet. Have you tried to make any friends with the famlies next to where you live.
2006-07-01 08:51:18 · answer #8 · answered by bobcat7756 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
most people are ignorant and reject the unknown. And it seems like where you are living is like "Leave it to Beaver" times. Just forget about them - bottom line, they are jealous!
2006-07-01 08:49:07 · answer #9 · answered by kizdrop 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like i live in a mormon reserve but im guessing they just country hillbillies, watch they dont cook u up for dinner
2006-07-01 08:49:20 · answer #10 · answered by www.snoozey 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋