Why am I so obsessed with domination; either by me, or by someone over me? This has been a life long fetish.?

Question

No date offers please.

Answer 1

From your question, it sounds like you are equally comfortable giving and getting. That is unusual.

I can only speak for myself here. I'm not really into domination as a fetish, but because I had been vicimized as a child, I cannot handle being dominated in any way. If someone is going to do the dominating, it will be me. I am a control freak--not just in relationships, but in life.

The fact that you can swing from one side to the other is intriguing, to say the least. You might want to start exploring your past for reasons since most of these fetishes are rooted in early childhood. However, if no one is being hurt and the activity is consensual for both parties, engaging in that type of activity is not the worst thing you could do.

Answer 2

There's no way for us to know why you're obsessed with domination, whether it's by you or someone else. That this has been a lifelong fetish doesn't help us to help you sort it out. Additionally, your question is confusing. I understand domination, but when you ask, "...either by me, or by someone else..." are you saying that you're both dominating and submissive?

In any case, only you can answer that question. You may want to go over events in your life that could have contributed to your acquiring this fetish, to better understand it. That's not to say that understanding it would RESOLVE it, or even that your fetish needs to be resolved.

Finding and understanding your fetish's origins may help you to more fully appreciate and enjoy your fetish. I'd guess you only need to RESOLVE it if you're participating in self-destructive behaviour.

Either way, good luck.

Answer 3

if this is a sexual thing, than so long as it it safe and does not significantly harm them, it should be fine. But if you are talking about relationships. It might have been strife in the past where you were often not the winner.

but if you are looking for the cause of domination fetishes, I am not sure there is a definitive way to figure that out from a psychological point of view, the causes of certain things, can be so small and subtle they may never be found.

if it's destroying your relationships, then maybe you can talk to a psychologist to get you someone compatible, or find out where to look.

Answer 4

I just want to know is "Why?!" Having power isn't what it's all out to be. Why would you want to be denominator over someone or them to dominate over you? Why has that been a long fetish? I won't judge you, but I don't understand it or get it. The reason you like it, is because you may feel as though you or someone should have power over someonelse. They should dominate someone besides themselves. Do you think that's right? Would actually agree with anyone having power over someone.

Answer 5

Why are U wasting time typing this crap? Did I say U could think? Get your lazy butt over and clean my house in your little maid outfit while me and my friends make U get us beers and slap U on your butt when U walk by !!! How U like that,baby??

Answer 6

I am dominant, and I think a lot of it is genetic myself. I gave up looking for answers about why, and just accepted it.

Answer 7

I often thought the best match would be a sadist and a masochist. But the masochist would say "Beat me" and the sadist would say, "No".

It's power. Relinquishing or abusing. As long as your partner is willing to fullfill and isn't truly being forced, then enjoy.

Answer 8

Apparently you feel a need for a single controlling force in your life. Partnership has some real perks, you should try it.

Answer 9

maybe you've been abused as a child? I don't think yahoo answers is the place to solve this issue, unless off course its a power trip for you

Answer 10

It's just a fetish, like you said. You answered your own question..... I DECLARE THIS QUESTION OVER.