2006-07-01 03:51:57 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Time
As they say, time heals all wounds. It's completely normal to be upset and to be afraid of trusting again.
I mean you'd be irrational if you didn't get upset. You planned a future with this man, you thought you'd be together forever and he totally destroyed all of that.
I think you're going to have to work through it. Eventually you'll realize not all men are pricks.
I say be alone for awhile, get your **** straight. Don't date immediately. Then after a few years, start dating again, but ultra picky. Make sure your friends and family like him - if not then it's a bad sign.
One day you will learn to love and trust again. It just takes time. I'm sorry, there is no magical answer. =/
*I say wait a few YEARS b/c first off you don't want to go into a new relationship with baggage. You don't want to get hurt again and assume all men are asses. You don't want to love again too soon and 'not see the forest for the trees' (be naive and needy). I mean over all, you need to become independant and emotionally stable again. You also need to get your financial **** together. If you were dating this guy I would say give it a few months, marriage is different, there's an 'expectation' attached to marriage, hence it's going to be harder for you to get over.
Good Luck!
2006-07-01 03:54:00 · answer #1 · answered by Corn_Flake 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi,
Been here done that thing your talking about....For me it took a lot of talking with my friend that I have know for a lifetime....then one day the pain started slowly going away and the other day I met someone that I really like and he told me to quit being angry he and I were hitting it off and then he said to me he was going to try and get back together with the ex wife. All I can tell you is that no matter what we do in life there are mountain tops and pitfalls....we can be happy and take a deep breath on the mountain top ...but when we fall into the hole, we need to choose wisely the road we take back to the top .....IE learn from our mistakes and not make them again....oh yeah...just remember that you will put up walls to make the hurt go away ...but you will need to let them down sooner or later to feel again.
Hope this Helped..ALLIE
2006-07-01 04:00:08 · answer #2 · answered by redhotcowbaby 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you staying with him or leaving? If you are staying with him it will take lots of time. This man is going to have to re-earn your trust and respect. He is going to have to cut loose those guys night outs and poker nights (or whatever he does) and spend quality time with his wife for a while if he deems his marriage important. You must either decide to forgive him immediately or to not forgive him. If you forgive him things can work out. If you don't forgive him you might as well start the big "D". Martin King says it best, "Forgiveness does not mean ignoring what has been done or putting a false label on an evil act. It means, rather, that the evil act no longer remains as a barrier to the relationship."
2006-07-01 04:03:20 · answer #3 · answered by Secret Squirrel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You move on by accepting the fact that he cheated and you can not trust him anymore.look sweetie now you know that you can start all over again. you have a fresh start a clean sheet.You do not have to go for anything less than your expectations. if you sit down at home home moaning and groaning, honey you ai'nt helping yourself a bit. what you need to do is get up and get on with life.and listen sweetie emotions can be controlled ,so the next time you wanna go and cry over him think about how much hurt you endured when he cheated on you.girl you will get fired up and say what am i sitting here for i'm about to go party!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-07-01 04:00:49 · answer #4 · answered by Sexytaurusaka305 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This sounds like a familiar question: But...here goes. WHY ARE YOU TORTURING YOURSELF? Do you like the pain? Does making yourself miserable bring you some kind of pleasure? Get yourself a diary/binder and write everything you want to write about "him" in it; your feeling when you were cheated on, how angry you are! Pour out everything. When you're done....Burn IT and let your feelings go with it. You're not hurting anyone but yourself reliving this. So, get out and make some new friends, don't talk or think about the loser and go about your life.
2006-07-01 03:57:55 · answer #5 · answered by Sassy OLD Broad 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
move on with ur life n try not 2 let ur emotions affect
2006-07-01 03:56:18 · answer #6 · answered by koumba s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
in case you've tried each and every thing you could to recapture that love besides the undeniable fact that it really is merely no longer there, then you definately could go away him. in spite of if he would not want you to. do not stay jointly for the youngsters. you're truly preparation them that that is totally well to be in a loveless courting. you won't be able to sacrifice your happiness for the strong of him or your household and searching a love that's significant will be ten circumstances better on your children. it really is a poisonous enviroment you're in with him and your children and also you should do what you sense is ideal for you and your children. in person-friendly words your heart and head can inform you what the subsequent step is.
2016-10-14 00:52:33 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well sweetie it is gonna b hard trust me. but all u can do is pray and try to get over him it will take a while. make sure that u r over him b4 u move on cause if u r not then u might find mr right and possible mess up that relationship due to the feelings that u have for your x.
2006-07-01 03:56:16 · answer #8 · answered by b_ladyme 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It`s gonna take time, but you gotta just do it and move on. Your emotions are going to be effected until you let go of the past.
2006-07-01 03:59:20 · answer #9 · answered by dragonchopper 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Im sorry to be a bearer of bad news but thats like asking how do you live forever or how do I make the color of the sky into green instead of blue. theres just no way that can be done.
2006-07-01 03:55:46 · answer #10 · answered by thmslln3 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋