my oldest child soon to be 4 will not act or respond to me until I raised my voice. When I ask her to do something nicely once or twice, she don't hear me until I get loud. Regardless of what I ask of her, pick up toys, to something nice, come and eat, or stop doing something, she don't hear me. When I raise my voice that's when she act. What can I do?
2006-06-30 20:11:22 · 10 answers · asked by KaPaul L 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
Have her hearing checked,and if it's ok,then do the following. When you ask something of her,go to her,turn her face to you,and make sure you have eye contact. She might just be zoning out,and doesn't hear,or perhaps she has other problems. If she's normal every other way,she's just zoning out,I'd say
2006-06-30 21:34:23 · answer #1 · answered by dragonfly 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, like others said, have her hearing checked.
If her hearing is fine, then you'll have to be more proactive. If she doesn't respond the first time, get down on her level so that she's looking at you, and repeat what you said. If she still ignores you, ask her to tell you what you just asked her to do.
If that doesn't work, you may have to remove her from her current situation, start putting away whatever she's playing with, etc.
My husband doesn't always hear me the first time I tell him something, so I know that my 3-year-old comes by it honestly. I give her a couple chances to acknowledge me, and then she's lost her right to do whatever it was herself. It usually sends her into a tantrum, which I ignore, but she's slowly learning that if she listens to me, she gets to do more of what she wants to, and life is easier for all of us.
Good luck!
2006-07-01 15:35:27 · answer #2 · answered by Mom to 3 under 10 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would have her hearing checked. She may have fluid behind her ear drum. That would make low sounds hard to hear. It is fixable if that is it with tubes. When i was younger i had that problem i could only here loud noises but i got the tubes i can hear perfect now. If you know she hears you i would start the one, two, thee magic program. It works great alot of schools use it. Its where you give a child three chances to do something then after the thrid time they are sent to time out or punished so sort of way. It takes a while but it does work. I have a nephew that is ADHD and Bipolar it works great for him. All i have to do is hold up fingers. He knows when i get to three the Tv will go off or etc... for example ask your child to go pick up toys. Sue please pick up your toys. and they do not move. Wait a minute or so, and say, Sue holding two fingers up This is number two go pick your toys or i will pick them up and you wont be abkle to play with them anymore and you will be in time out. Still If nothing Sue thats Three Now lets go to your room. Pick her up or what ever you have to do to get her in time out. 3 mins for every year old she is or something like that. Then you pick up the toys and put them were she can see them but not reach them and when she asks to play with them tell her no because she didnt them up. I would keep the toys from my nephew for like two hours. It works it really does. Again the program is called 1,2,3 magic.
2006-07-01 09:25:10 · answer #3 · answered by cajunprincess97 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, have her hearing checked. If she really cant hear you, that may be something to check on first.
If her hearing is fine, then its probably stubborness. She hears you, and ignores you, thinking she may not have to do it if she thinks you think she cant hear you. Its not uncommon at 4, my son still does this and he's almost 6.
When you dont get a response the first time, get down on her level and make her look at you while you ask. "Mommy said please pick up your toys", if she refuses and her hearing is fins, ask again, in the same way, making sure she is looking at you "Momm asked you to pick up your toys, and if you dont listen to Mommy, you'll take a time out"....or whatever punishment you decide. If her hearing is fine, you have to combat the stubborness.
2006-07-01 14:14:50 · answer #4 · answered by sweetie_baby 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
gently grab her arm and turn her to you and look her in the face and speak to her. Make sure she knows that when you are speaking to her you expect her to listen, it could be for her safety. And yes have her hearing checked.
2006-07-01 03:20:22 · answer #5 · answered by ednasorcas 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i bet that she needs tubes to open her ear canals, i had the same problem with my 4 year old. Get her hearling checked, then you will know what is wrong, and how to respond.
2006-07-01 23:16:12 · answer #6 · answered by wiltrk 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If her hearing is okay, try whispering. Then she will have to strain to hear what you're saying and will pay more attention.
2006-07-08 00:58:18 · answer #7 · answered by mrsbornkuntry 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have her hearing checked.
2006-07-01 03:14:37 · answer #8 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She might have more problems then just not wanting to listen to you. Talk to her pediatrician about it
2006-07-01 03:16:16 · answer #9 · answered by HPEmomofone 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
welcome to parenthood
2006-07-06 05:04:14 · answer #10 · answered by Sandra K 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋