somepoints to the funny joke.?

Answer 1

Why doesn't Tigger have any friends?
He plays with Pooh.

Answer 2

14 Signs Your Online Relationship Isn't Working Out





14) You discover that "Chesty McBust" isn't her real name, and she's dialing in from Langley, VA.

13) You: Large, hairy man. Your online girlfriend: Large, hairy man.

12) Her postmaster rejects your e-mail not as "undeliverable" but as "unlikely to get you anywhere."

11) After months of shared experiences and emotional investments, she attacks you in the Mines of Quarn with a Vorpal Sword when she
learns you're worth 45,000 points.

10) "Returned mail: User unknown and never wants to hear from you again."

9) Your cyber-lover is just too busy editing that silly little Top 5 List.

8) Getting perhaps a bit too comfortable, she lets a reference to cutting her chin shaving slip by.

7) You discover that she has been cutting and pasting her orgasms.

6) You can barely make out your S. L.'s face in the JPEG she sent because she's obscured by her 25 cats.

5) He claims to be the richest man in the world, but his GIF looks like some geek who works for a software company.

4) Since her first e-mail, Make.Money.Fast!@cyber-promotions.com has become cold and distant.

3) She's suddenly changed her address to [e-mail]

2) Ken Starr launches an investigation into your relationship with the mysterious [e-mail]

1) In an ironic twist of fate, you discover that the object of your affection is a curvaceous 18 year old, rather than the geeky 14 year old boy she'd pretended to be

Answer 3

The Pastor's A$$

The pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won. The pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in another race, and it won again. The local paper read: PASTOR'S A$$ OUT FRONT.
The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the pastor not to enter the donkey in any more races, The next day the local paper headline read: BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR'S A$$.
This was too much for the Bishop, so he ordered the pastor to get rid of the donkey. The pastor decided to give it to a nun in a nearby convent.
The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline the next day: NUN HAS THE BEST A$$ IN TOWN. The Bishop fainted.
He informed the nun that she would have to get rid of the donkey, so she sold it to a farmer for $10. The next day the paper read: NUN SELLS A$$ FOR $10.
This was too much for the Bishop, so he ordered the nun to buy back the donkey and lead it to the high plains where it could run wild. The next day the headlines read: NUN ANNOUNCES HER A$$ IS WILD AND FREE.
Alas... the Bishop was buried the next day.
MORAL OF THE STORY????
Being concerned about public opinion can bring you much grief and misery, and even shorten your life. So, be yourself and enjoy life...
STOP WORRYING ABOUT EVERYONE ELSE'S A$$, and you'll live longer and be alot happier!

Answer 4

A woman named Shirley was from Beverly Hills. One day, she had a heart attack and was taken to Cedars Sinai hospital. While on the operating table, she had a near-death experience. She saw God and asked, "Is this it?" God said, "No, you have another 30 to 40 years to live." Upon her recovery, she decided to stay in the hospital and have collagen shots, cheek implants, a face lift, liposuction and boob augmentation. She even had someone dye her hair. She figured since she had another 30 to 40 years, she might as well make the most of it. She walked out of Cedars Sinai lobby after the last operation and was killed by an ambulance speeding up to the hospital. She arrived in front of God and said, "I thought you said I had another 30 to 40 years?" God replied, "Shirley! I didn't recognize you!"

Answer 5

There was a dim-witted young fellow who was no good with girls, but somehow, he got a date anyway. He asked a friend of his for good, safe topics to talk about on their date.

"Well, don't bring up religion or politics." his friend told him. "That's asking for trouble. But there are a few topics that are generally safe. One is food-- everybody has to eat. Another one is family-- everybody has one. And the third is philosophy-- everybody has a view of the world."

"Food, family, philosophy..." the dunce repeated. "I think I can remember that."

So the evening of his big date came, and he was sitting nervously next to the girl and sweating, and wondering what to say next. He struggled to recall the three big topics, and then all of a sudden, he remembered the first:food!

Turning to her, he blurted out, "Do you like noodles...?"
She drew back a little at this sudden interrogation and, wide eyed, answered him, "No...."

This was terrible! he was getting nowhere, when he suddenly remembered the second topic of conversation: family!

Turning to her again, he blurted out, "Do you have a brother...?"
She drew back again, as before, and with her eyes twice as wide, she answered, "No...."

This was even worse! He was almost in despair, when he remembered the third sure-fire, guaranteed topic of conversation: philosophy!

Now full of self-confidence and poise, he turned to her and asked, "Well, if you DID have a brother, do you think that HE would like noodles...?"







Laugh or I'll tell it again!

Answer 6

one day a mom and her 4 year old son were sitting at a bench the mom was talking on her phone so the kid stuck hid finger in her mouth she got off the phone and laughed but the 4 year old was cring she asked whats wrong he said YOU ATE MY BUGGIE!

Answer 7

A lesson to be learned from typing the wrong e-mail address.

A Minneapolis couple decided to go to Florida to thaw out from a particulary icy winter.They planned to stay at the same hotel they had spent their honeymoon 20 years before. Because of tight schedules,it was difficult to coordinate their travel schedules. the husband left Minneapolis and flew to florida on Friday,and the wife was flying down the following day.

The husband checked into the hotel and unlike years ago their was computers in his room,and he decided to send an e-mail to his wife however, he accidentally left out one letter in her e-mail address without noticing his error, sent the e-mail to the wrong address.

Meanwhile...somewhere in Houston..a widow had just returned home from her husbands funeral. he was called away from home to go to the hospital after suffering a heart attack ,but unfortunately passed away.the widow decided to check her e-mail expecting messages from relatives and friends.after reading the first message, she screamed and then fainted. the widow's son came into the room and found his mother on the floor, and then glanced at the computer screen which read:

To: My Loving Wife
Date:Friday,October 13, 2004
subject: I have arrived!

Dearest love,
I know you are supprised to here from me. they have computers here now, and you are allowed to send e-mails to your loved ones. i have just arrived and have been checked in. I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tommorow, and look forward to seeing you then.

Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was.

P.S....Sure is freaken Hot Down Here!!!!!

Answer 8

an old man goes to the doctors for a checkup. the doctor says "sorry, really bad news. you have cancer and you have Alzheimer's disease." the old man stares ahead for a minute or two and says "well, at least I don't have cancer"

Answer 9

A clown's face is a joke.

Answer 10

tell you girlfriend that you are gay and tell her that your penis is TOO BIG LIKE 900000000 INCHS OR SOMETHING. HAVE THAT JOKE FOR FREE