should i have sex with the man i love!?

Question

god know who much i love my man! i really want to have sex with him but the thing is i'm afraid i get pregnant! i know he did it already but still........... and i don't like condoms so forget that option!.........he never asked me for sex but i want to have it with him......i want to feel the pleasure with him..........what should i do? and my family is a strict christians and they don't believe in sex before marriage!!! what bshould i do?..........please help me!

and also! he he does not have hiv...........i made sure of that by getting him tested and he wants to marry me but i said not now........he was a bit disappointed but i don't like marriage because my father left my mom when i was 5 so i don't think marriage works.........(sniff) my life is so screwed up........i finally meet the guy of my dreams and because of my work cause i travel alot and my parents past.........i don't believe in marriage or true love but god alone knows how much i love him! we were friends at first and i didn't even reliaze that he was inlove with me until three years ago that's why i want to have sex with him...........i know he thinks sex is not a game and neither do i but i want to be in bed with him and give him my heart body and soul...........i want to have sex with him. yes i am a virgin and i don't like condoms because of the risks that bare involved. my friend used a condom and he still got his girfriend pregnant.i'm sorry that i think love is crap.

Answer 1

Wait until you're married. You WILL appreciate it later.

Answer 2

First, how old are you?
Assuming you are over the age of legal consent, then it's a decision you have to make. It basically comes down to a moral one for you. If you've been brought up in your faith your whole life, is going against that something you'll feel comfortable with, or something you'll regret?
If that isn't really an issue for you, then do it. Use a condom, if you've never had sex, how do you know you don't like them. A condom is better than a STD or HIV. Unless you are in an extended mutually trusting, committed relationship, and both have been tested for disease, never have sex without a condom.
And since a condom isn't 100% safe against pregnancies, if you're that worried you should be on the pill.

Answer 3

If you're not going to protect yourself against pregnancy and/or STD's, then you're probably not responsible enough to be having sex. Get on some birth control at the very least, and get a more mature attitude about condoms than "I don't like condoms so forget that option!"

Apparently you've had sex before, with someone who used a condom, or you wouldn't know that you don't like condoms.

Religion aside, it's your body, your conscience, and your business. But if you're going to take risks or make foolish choices, be prepared for the consequences. If you use proper birth control, there's no need for your family to know you've had sex outside of marriage...if you get pregnant because you "don't like condoms" and didn't get on the pill or something similar, it'll be a lot harder to hide your big ol' belly from them...

Answer 4

Honestly you are the only one who can anwer that question. It's a personal thing. However, judging by your writing I would say that you are quite young. And if you are having such doubts and concerns, I would really wait on it a little longer.

Also don't be stupid about a condom. In this day and age with all the diseases and such you do not want to put yourself in that position. How do you even know if you'll like condoms if you never particiapted in sex before. Especially for a women, trust me there is very little difference on your end, and the protection is well worth it.

Answer 5

listen to me carefully , not cz ur dad left ur mum thus means that he will do the same , n the proof that he asked to marry u when a guy ask a women to marry him n didn't ask her for sex it means he loves her really so he will never leave but this maybe u will lose him , so marriage is something great u share ur life , body , ideas , ur money , everything with the one u love so try .
Also dnt make a sin it's what bible said so dnt deviate from god's word , not just this but me too i saw some couples married n they r very happy together since 20 years ( more than a couple ) and i am sure u have a really wonderful guy cz he wants u not only ur body so he is in love with u so take care u won't lose him n marry him .
Another thing i will tell u 2 experiences of 2 of my freinds th1st did sex with her husband before marriage , she said she felt no difference in her marriage day it wasn't that special she wanted it to be n she was sorry she didn't wait till her marriage day .
The other waited she said it was a really special night where she felt rewally great cz in one day she shared with him everything , she said it was great n she was happy she waited .
So wait , marry him he is a great guy , dnt lose him n u will marry him god will bless ur life n u will be happy cz u waited So the bless of god n his love n urs will make the happiest marriage ever .
MARRY HIM N U WILL THANK ME LATER , MARRY HIM N BE HAPPY , MARRY HIM .
i wish i convinced u with my word n now u knw what to do .
good luck .

Answer 6

If you dont like condoms then there really is not other option for you not to get pregnant even birth control isnt good enough alone. I know you said you love him and you want to feel the pleasure but chances are your to young to even be thinking about it and you should really use a condom if you are still wanting to have sex with him.

Answer 7

hi dear, I grew up in a very strict christian home and just like you I was anxious but a condom don't only protect you fron getting pregnant ,I think you should worry more about the diseases that are out there then the preganacy at least you can get a second chance and learn from your mistake but you becomes hiv positive there is no second chance there.I think there is more to a relationship than sex and if he is not pressureing you to do any thing then just take your time, because that alone tells me he probably cares for you.

Answer 8

You must understand that once you make a commitment then you can't take it back. No one wants to wake up in the morning and say, "Oh my God! I wish that I wouldn't have done that last night!" You can love him without doing any of that sexual act stuff. He can love you too without doing it. Some people treat sex like it's "I knew that it was his favorite color, so I went to the store and bought him one. And it fits perfect!" But SEX is not like that. YOU don't give anything and YOU don't take anything. YOU SHARE! It is the love that you share with each other all because you are both caring and sensitive toward each others wants and needs. I can talk to you in private if you'd like. Good luck.

Answer 9

You can have sex without having sex. sex so overated for love. love is so much more then sex. if you do not like condoms, then you are S.O.L. that and birth control pills to prevent pregnancies. its 50/50 chance that either you will or not. If i were you i would wait until was married the man 1st. oh does he truely love you back? hes not playing games or mind games with you and just saying that he loves you? sex and marriage are both big steps to take. actions speak louder then words sometimes.

Answer 10

if u really want 2 do it w/out a condom but r afraid of getting pregnant just wait till ur married or try birth control. u have take a chance somewhere. u wanna feel him but hate condoms, u wanna do it but aren't married, what about anal or oral sex. Ive never tried these but in ur situation maybe u could give a try, i mean he is the man u love right?

Answer 11

girl 1st always used a condom, even if you don't like them. it will save your life. he might look clean but you never know. you would not want to get a STD or worse HIV so use a condom.

2nd if your not sure, then you should not go all the way. wait till you are a little bit older a mature to take theses kind of decision. no offence.