What if I've had sex with my boyfriend only once this month?

Question

We've been together for more than 2 years! But a month ago when I told him I loved him (what I used to tell many times everyday) he has suddenly told me "Really?". At first I replied "Sure" but he asked me that question almost every time I told him I loved him so I began to think if I really do love him or maybe not! And just stopped telling this to him because I don't want to tell this if I don't think so!! I also try not to have sex with him because I don't want to do this if I might not love him!!! So we've done this only once in this month when he has really insisted on it! And I have not told I loved him at all in this month (when I used to tell this every day :( )!! He has also began to care less about me, to call me much less and when I ask him why he asks why don't I sleep with him! So today I told him that I was offended by that his question and he asked me if I loved him and I didn't reply anything. So what do you think of this? What will you do if you were at my or his place

Lol! We are 21 !

Answer 1

I've been In a 3 year relationship before, and I know what your going through. After so long, the feelings seem to go away. My aunt used to tell me, Love only comes natural for so long, then you have to work at it. I didn't listen to her, and I broke up with him. It has now been a year that I've been without him, and I have to say- You really dont know what you got till its gone! All that questioning I did, as to westher I loved him or not, and all it took was for me to lose him to realize it.
Just please, think about what you gys share, and if it really isnt working than maybe you deserve better, but dont do thing to quickly, really consider and talk about it with your boyfriend. i would want to see anyone make the mistake I did.
Good-Luck. If you ever need to talk more, email me.

Answer 2

You are either very young or very confused about this relationship. If you have questioned your love for him then why do you think he should not begin to pull away.

Do you want your cake and eat it too? You want to have him around but you don't have a clear reason why. You refuse sex almost all the time. That is your right of course but ask yourself what is the real reason? If you are not attracted to him then time to let him go. You can tell someone you love them every hour on the hour 24/7 but if your other actions show you may not they get the message.

Get your own feelings straight and things will work out.

And the thing you said about him sayng "really"......it means while you say you love him he sees nothing else that proves it. I am not talkiing about sex. There are many ways girls who have truly lost attraction for a guy tell him that they have. The....."really"....is trying to make sense of what you say and how you act.

Answer 3

Sounds like your not communicating very much at all.
You need to be talking about your relationship. Answer with what your really feeling. Maybe he didn't believe at first you really did care for him a lot. And when he said "sure", it put doubts in your mind. And the longer it goes and you get no feed back that he is feeling the same then you start putting up bearers and pull away.
Your both afraid of being hurt maybe.
If you can't talk about it, it won't clear up the problem.

Answer 4

You are confusing the hell out of this guy. He has started to care less about you probably because you have put distance between you two. You don't tell him that you love him anymore, you don't want to have sex with him anymore, and then you get offended when he asked you about your feelings? If you don't love him or need time to think about things, then tell him. It's unfair that you are hanging on to him and you don't even know if you care about him or not. Time apart with help the both of you decide what path to take.

Answer 5

Sounds like you may need to take a few weeks off from one another and see how you feel during thous two weeks off. That will tell you in each others hearts if the love is really there or is it a word that you say just to hear the other person say I love you back.

Answer 6

I had a friend in the same problem that you are in.

First, you shouldn't say you love him unless you really do.
Second, you shouldn't have sex with unless you really want to.

I honesty think you shouldn't have had sex with him in the first place cause now he is going to want to do all the time and you're are going to in up seeing different sides of him.

You should break up with him before it gets out of hand!

Answer 7

I would question at the point he said "really". That's a red flag that there is a high probability there is someone else. If your just t boyfriend and girlfriend and he needs to beg he's going somewhere else to his sexual needs. prior to my marriage I questioned the love of women as way to get out of the relationship and trust me there was always someone else.

Answer 8

Love and sex are not the same and sex is not necessary for love. Don't get the 2 confused.

Answer 9

As a man I would say you shook him up. He may not be ready for love. Ask him directly about this in a non-threatening way. Good luck, I hope it works out.

Answer 10

Ugh, another teenager asking a relationship/sex question.

You are both immature kids and should not be having sex or complicated relationships. Wait until you are older and are able to have mature relationships.