I met this guy out side a club we exchanged number and we have been talking on the phone for about a mounth...I just recently met up with him and he said I was marriage material... then he asked this if he was to get me pregnant would I work on a marriage with him...Wow that was a bit much for me... and i am scared now... he is a nice guy...but I dont want to think about sex and kids with him yet.. well sex yes but not kids...is it to soon to have a kid talk?
2006-06-30 04:50:17 · 24 answers · asked by CreateSomthing 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If you want sex, then its the right time for a kid talk. Since its only been a month, I strongly suggest you wait longer for sex. If he is someone you could see yourself marrying, then you both need time to learn about each other. I got preggy my first time, so I'd never suggest casual sex. I'd been with my guy a year, so I knew enough about him to know he'd not run off. So if you are thinking relationship, then go slow. If its just sex, you need to tell him that. No point in either of you expecting too much.
2006-06-30 04:56:14 · answer #1 · answered by Velken 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well, if you're not ready to be in a permanent relationship, then don't move in that direction. This would mean also not thinking about sex in any active manner either, because once you do that (even without kids) you've created a permanent change in the relationship, there should not be a breakup after that.(*)
Find out what he means by 'marriage material', and what he means by 'working on a marriage with him'. In as much detail as possible. And think about how you would answer these same questions, because he will no doubt ask.
And then use your answers to determine whether you are ready, whether he could be the right one, and as a guide for what to ask about to find out everything you need to know to make your decision.
May God bless you and grant you wisdom
2006-06-30 05:00:38 · answer #2 · answered by songkaila 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depending on how old you are. If you're a teen, WAY to soon. If you're in your twenties, that is a conversation for after a number of months, maybe a year. If your in your lower thirties, could be after two months. If you are in your late thirties to early forties, I'd wait until to 3 week. If your in your mid to late forties - if your talking about having kids, you better talk about it on the first date because your time has just about run out. Beyond that, unless the words adoption or foster are mixed in, you should be planning on having children.
2006-06-30 05:00:20 · answer #3 · answered by Nemo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok hopefully this was just a hypothetical question he was asking. Let's look at it from that idea. That makes it a little less scary.
Have a conversation with him about things you want for YOUR life. When do you see yourself having kids and settling down? What age, perhaps? Tell him if he's the right one for that, it'll happen in its own time. Let him know that till then, your current goals are to go out, have fun, and just get to know him. Tell him you don't think either of you should be worried about marriage stuff at this point. If his goals don't match up with yours, you may want to just look elsewhere to avoid heartbreak later.
2006-06-30 04:56:37 · answer #4 · answered by blueskies7890 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow yea that was really soon..i think that you should make sure that the other person wants kids but not YOUR kids..cuz you dont want to have a serious relationship with them an then find out they don't want it so yea that was too soon..I'd say to wait bout 2 yrs
2006-06-30 04:56:22 · answer #5 · answered by samantha1989 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think some people just get scared that they are going to waste thier time with someone that dosn't want the same things they want. I would tell the guy that you are marriage material but that you arn't ready to think about marriage and children. Don't waste your time either.
2006-06-30 05:38:28 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
H*** yeah it way to soon tell at least give me 4 years before u start talking about kids and marriage any time after that it cool but at least give me 4
2006-06-30 04:57:52 · answer #7 · answered by poohbearbear 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is a really couple of minutes to discuss topics like that. possibly, you would possibly want to offer the courting your time to work out if all factors of concurs with both genuinely one of you. there is not any guarantees that once you're married that you gained't locate a number of his habit below agreeable and vice versa. this is what courting are, and also you want someone who is going to be good with you in the course of the undesirable cases besides because the best. do not rush into something too right now.
2016-11-30 01:15:30 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh Jesus - dump this loser - sounds like he just wants to *** inside then bail on you
and, imho, don't get married before having sex with them
and having sex with someone doesn't mean you have to marry them
dump the loser - GUYS AT NIGHTCLUBS ARE NOT "STEADY" MATERIAL - even if they are, that environment is not a quality environment to meet someone - and more than likely both people had their drink on and don't have clear perceptions anyway
2006-06-30 04:56:29 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
WAY too soon for him to be talking like that. It almost sounds like he's trying to get married for some other reason than love. Like maybe he needs a green card or something. I'd be very wary of him and stay away.
2006-06-30 04:53:56 · answer #10 · answered by rocknrobin21 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋