Would it be a sin? revised?

Question

I have been divorced for nearly a year from my husband. He was physically abusive, he was sleeping around on me, and was constantly drunk. My pastor agreed that these were grounds for a divorce and that I was not sinning. He also discussed remarriage. I am only 25 and have two little kids.

A few months ago I began dating. I have met a WONDERFUL man and he is meshing well with my family. He is also divorced, he wife was sleeping around on him. He is 35.

We have talked about marriage, but we are working together to make sure that this is the best for both of us. We are very passionate towards each other, we love each other very much. Is it a sin to have sex out of marriage if you are getting RE-married? I was a virgin with my husband, but I am not sure what the rules are once your divorced. My body aches for his touch. It is really hard to not have sex once you've started. Any wisdom? Thank you so much. God Bless you all!

Answer 1

It is a sin for the fact that not only does God want us to learn self control but also you can't tell the future..you may intend on being together forever but you have no way of knowing what tomorrow brings. Just stay strong, resist temptation and put all of your frustrations into the planning of the wonderful day that the 2 of you become 1.

Answer 2

I definetley feel for you havinf been in a very similar situation about 7 years ago. It is very hard to fight those feelings and God Bless you , You have done better than I did. I had had an abusive husband verbally and physically and then when I would not take it he turned on the oldest of my eight children and stared going on down the line. To make along story short, his family told me I would go to hell if I ever left him, myself told me I could not let my children get hurt. I told hm no more hitting the kids or I would see him in rot in Jail. H e turned his anger back on me and that was it. I met a man 17 years my jnior a very good man. we had relations before we married, then we had to make apologies to my children and our heartas told us we had to recieve forgiveness from the Lord. It may be aproblem with your children and you could set an example you do not want your children to live by. Be Strong In The Lord Please Wait for the marriage. Yes we can be forgiven but it is hard to have to answer to these children and set them straight. I fI could do it over again I would definitely wait. I would be married to my husband but the besroom would have waited. I was IN my first marriage fior 22 years and my feeling were never taken into consideration. I did as I was told. I pray this helpd. Love in the Lord.

Answer 3

Henry D. Taylor, “Thou Shalt Love Thy Wife with All Thy Heart,” Ensign, Jan. 1974, 36


A wise man once counseled: “Before marriage keep thine eyes wide open, then after marriage keep them half closed.”

Marriage brings adjustments, because each has his or her own personality. Reared in homes with varying backgrounds, marriage naturally will require the making of adjustments.

Marriage, my beloved young brothers and sisters, should not be just taken for granted. It must be worked at, but realize that you can have the kind of marriage that you earnestly desire and for which you are willing to work. Marriage will require giving and taking; it will mean sharing, because life was meant to be shared. A happy and successful marriage means forgetting oneself and thinking of ways in which to make one’s companion happy. It might be well each day for the husband to think, “What can I do today to make Mary happy?” And Mary should say to herself, “What can I do today to make John happy?” A happy Home is where the wife is treated like a queen and the husband is treated like a king. And so, it is not only marrying the right partner, it is being the right partner.


If you think this is the one person for you, then you have a whole lifetime ahead to be with him, you don't have to rush into things, take it slow and steady and the more work you put in the more you get out.

Answer 4

The short answer is no, it would not be a sin. The long answer deals with religion and the purpose behind Christ's sacrifice.

In science, as time goes on we gain a better understanding of Creation. From time to time we gain insight that changes our whole perspective. Men like Newton and Einstein revolutionized our understanding in ways that changed the world. Each one brought us a step closer to the truth, though none was exactly "quite right". Now, we have come to realize that the entire universe, in all its majesty and diversity, is made up of only one thing (we call it the ultimon). All the stars, all the planets, all the energy, everything, is just different aspects of the same, simple thing.

Creation gives us clues into the mind of the Creator. In all His infinite majesty, glory and diversity, at the core God is made of one, simple thing. You've heard it before. God is Love.

Read your Bible and pay attention to the history contained there. At first, men did whatever was right in their own eyes. Then came "the prophets", who ruled from time to time and gave what insight they could. After that came the Law with clear, distinct rules of behavior. Each step in this process brought us a little closer to the truth, though none was "quite right".

When Christ came he had a new message. He took all the Law and condensed it into one simple rule. Love. Love God, and love others as you love yourself. That's it. His death was meant to fufill the Law. Following the Law no longer brings righteousness. Breaking it no longer brings condemnation. That old rule is over. Finished. Complete.

God is love. You show respect, obedience and honor to God by Love. Not by following rules that no longer apply. You say very clearly that your reasons for being affectionate with this man are based entirely on your love for him and his for you. Having love is pretty pointless if you don't express it. You're not going to be screwing this guy. You're going to be making love to him. There's a difference. Not in the act, but in your heart... the motives and thoughts that fill you.

Think about it. Even in marriage sex can be used for reasons other than love. It can be used to manipulate and control, abuse, hurt, demean... That's not love and under Christ's rule it is not permitted. Even in marriage. If the act of marriage no longer sanctifies the act of sex in all respects, then the lack of marriage no longer condemns it in all respects. That Law is finshed. It no longer applies.

The truth is, if you don't make love to this man, you won't be acting out of love. The sin isn't in making love to him. It's in not doing so.

Answer 5

Hi. It's a sin if you go by that kind of thinking, I think.

On the other hand, are you really damaging your soul by loving him physically? I doubt it, especially since you seem to love each other so much.

I think that you both deserve to be intimate with each other. It sounds like it's been a while since either of you made love with someone worth your time.

I don't personally believe that there is anything wrong with being intimate with each other. It's not like you're just sleeping around. You are in love and mature, right?

Answer 6

Who knows what's best for you? Society? Religion? No...you do. Doesn't God want you to be happy? Rules don't make people happy...especially idiotic ones like sex out of marriage. Is it better to have sex out of marriage or rush into a marriage just for sex? What if he's lousy in bed...it happens. Follow your heart, your higher self. If it feels right, then do it. Don't live your life paranoid thinking that this "judging" God is going to condemn you for silly rules like that. Live your life by what your heart and intuition tells you. If your looking for a divine answer, look within yourself because that is where divinity is.

Answer 7

Sex out of marriage is a sin no mater how you look at it. If I were to steel and ask for forgiveness then steel again would the second time be a sin (yes) Sorry try to hang on and don’t just jump into anything your not sure of.

Answer 8

It sounds like things are going well for you and you're doing your best to stay in God's will. I really respect and admire that.

I was in your position once.

Yes, sex outside of marriage is still sin, even though you've already been married. It's still fornication. Wait till you're married - God will bless that. Believe me, I KNOW how hard it is not to cave . . . I haven't resisted like you have. I hope you make it.

Answer 9

I do not think it would be a sin to get remarried.
But your question about sex is a good one. I suggest that you do whatever you feel God would want you to. If it were me, I propably wouldn't, but that's just me.

Life is very hard, you know. You don't know what age to settle down, or be single for a while. I understand your concern. Pray about it. It is your descision. I'm not a conservative Christian.
God Bless

Answer 10

Yes, it is a sin.
Having sex without being married shows disrespect for marriage and for each other. While you are getting married, you are not married.