I went with this boy for 41/2 yrs. he wants to have sex what should I do?

Question

I don't know what to do should I do what he wants me to do.. But I don't know because, I want to save myself until marriage..I have been goin' with him since Elemantary and I love him to death and I don't really know should I do because, I love him... I really realize how much I love him now that he is in jail.... Please tell me what should I do??

Answer 1

Since elementary + 4.5 years means you are AT MOST a sophomore in high school.

I teach sophomore English, and from the essays I've read, you want to stay away from having sex that young. I have yet to read an essay from a young girl that talks about how she is happy to have lost her virginity. If he's pressuring you - he sucks. I know it's hard to hear, and I doubt you'll listen, but he's just a little boy who wants sex. If you two weren't together, he'd find someone else easy enough. Don't lower yourself to that level.

And if you do, for God's sake, USE A CONDOM. I'm SO tired of my students telling me about their pregnancy and how their boyfriend dumped them.

Answer 2

If you love him that much, and want to wait until marriage. tell him to put the ring on your finger and he can do it all he wants. If he balks then maybe he do not love you as you feel you do him. If he really loved you he would understand AND RESPECT your desire. He knows what the entrance fee is. So if he loved you as he say, he would be willing to pay the price. Your virtue is priceless. Once you give it away no amount of cash can buy it back. Even if the moment he took it he became the biggest jerk in the history of the world. HE OWNS THAT PART OF YOU FOREVER. He has bragging rights to it the day he dies, and there will not be a damn thing you can do about it. Would you give him an expensive Cartier watch, a 60 in plasma screen TV, a Lamborghini just because he said he loves you and you should give it to him? those things you can take back or at least get paid for. So, if you would not give him that on GP, why give him something priceless that you alone own and can only give away once? And if you did, and he did not marry you. What priceless would you have to give to your future husband? the one who proved he loves you because he vowed to spend the rest of his life with you? And I.O.U.?

Answer 3

Don't do it! If you want to save yourself for marriage then you should! I know it's probably hard to imagine, but the odds for this guy being the one are slim to none! If you've been with him since elementary, then at the oldest you might be a freshman in HS!? That's way too young in my opinion! You have the rest of your life for serious relationships, sex, and all of the responsibilities that come with it! Don't take a chance of ruining your life, you're so young! If he doesn't respect your wishes, he's not worth your time or your heart!

You should never do anything unless you are ready and willing to accept the consequences...i.e. STD's, Pregnancy, etc....

And if you do decide to do it! BE SMART, WEAR A CONDOM EVERY TIME!! Maybe take birth control too for added protection! Be careful, and take care!

Answer 4

wait...What??? that made completly no sense. But I will hang on to your sex question. Well if you really do love him and if he feels the same then he will understand that you want to wait until marrage to have sex. But if he does not understand then I would dump him because that is pervy and he obviously just wants to get in your pants....but the part about jail and elementary school...and also how could yall even THINK about sex if you guys are only 4 years out of elementary school? And wont it be a bit hard to have sex if he's in jail?

Answer 5

I have to admit, this is very confusing. When I was in elementary school, the highest grade people went to was 6th before going to junior high. So, in 6th grade, I would figure you would be somewhere around 11 or 12, & now that it has been 4.5 yrs., that would put you in the 15.5 to 16.5 range, right? If this guy is in jail, it sounds like he is older than you, at least by 1.5 yrs. minimum. Forgive me if I'm misunderstanding anything so far, but I'm trying to get a grasp on the situation.
Now, let's get down to brass tacks. If you truly want to save yourself for marriage, someone who loved & respected you would be able to respect your decision. It sounds like you are being pressured to do something you aren't ready to do. If waiting until marriage is the personal choice you are most comfortable with, then you should stick to your guns & not succumb to peer pressure, even if a guy says he loves you. Many, many guys have said the words "I love you" to get a girl to take off her panties. I'm proud to say I have never resorted to that, but I know guys who have. So, if you don't truly want sex, don't have it because he wants you to give it to him. If you want to wait, he should respect that.
Let's move on to the cold hard slap of reality for a minute. I'll try to make this gentle, as you are young, but tact isn't my strong suit. If this guy is already in jail, & we're assuming he is at the youngest 18, since any younger & most states would send him to juvenile hall, what sort of future can you two have? Do you really want to be the woman who in 10 years has 3 or more kids, & when they ask where their father is, you have to tell them a cellblock & cell number? I know, every girl has probably said it: "he'll change, I just know he will", & every girl has been wrong. Most likely, even if he wasn't in jail, this relationship is a first love & will eventually come to an end. With him being in jail already, that just makes the chances that much greater.
So, my advice to you is to wait until you are comfortable with the idea of having sex, & if you want to remain a virgin until you're married, do so. You'll probably be glad you did. Also, focus on you right now, & making the most of your life. Get an education so you can get a good career & make a bright future for yourself & your future children. When you're ready, find a man who also has career goals higher than printing license plates, & you may have a good future husband & father on your hands. Be proud of your moral stance to abstain, & stick to your guns. You deserve the best in life. Don't settle for less. Best of luck.

Answer 6

If you're not ready to have sex, then don't, I don't care what anyone else here says, because YOU'RE the one that will have to live with yourself and the decision you make. If you want to wait until your married, then great! That is your decision, and no one has the right to try and make you feel like a freak or anything because you want to wait. The man who truly loves you will respect you for that.

BTW, if you're so unsure about weather or not to have sex w/your bf, then don't until you're sure.

Answer 7

Honestly u need to move on from any1 who is n jail and plus how r u going have sex wit sum1 n jail? Is he going to stick his penis thru the bars thats not rational. People n jail talk crazy n e way out of loneliness

Answer 8

If you started going out in elementary school, you probably aren't very old. Also, why is he in jail? If you want to save yourself for marriage, then don't let him pressure you into it. If he loves you, he'll still respect you.

Answer 9

Honey you should follow your heart. if you're ready go ahead but don't do it because you're boyfriend wants you too. you're young don't be afraid to set your limits and stick to you're guns. Plus you might want to think about what kind of relationship you're going to have with a jail bird.

Answer 10

if he loves you, he waits. sex is not a requisit for a relationship. maybe is a step up but you should not feel obligated to do it.
this is when you notice if your gal want you or love you.
be pure to the end and god will reward you. if he leaves you and you have faith you will find your true love in many other ways or places