How can one suffering 18 yrs of depression ever expect to be happy? Meds, talking, friends/family dont help.?

Question

Ive been told that depression can be a mental disorder, sometimes caused by a chemical inbalance in the brain. Ive been told that depression is by choice, that Im making my self feel sad. I dont know what it is, but what I do know is that I wake up everyday feeling horribly miserable, Im almost afrai to go to sleep b/c of how I will feel the next day. Ive seen doctors and Im taking meds, nothing helps. I figure, if I could ask the wrld, then why not? Maybe there might be some help for me out there...

Answer 1

It's totally up to YOU whether or not you survive having Depression. YOU are the one in CONTROL not anyone else.

YOU have to be PRO-ACTIVE in your survival. Learn as much as you can on the subject. Consult your doctor. Make it a TEAM effort with your doctor. Do this for YOU!

Sleeping makes me clear headed during the day. It's the NIGHTS that get me going. Can't sleep worth anything. Toss & turn all night long.

Answer 2

I am in the same boat (why am i here at 2AM when i have a busy day in 5 hours)

I wake up sick to my stomach with bad dreams. So much more but you don't want to hear about my problems...

Sought medical help 7 or 8 years ago and what a bad scene. the Paxil that was prescribed made me more suicidal. Against doctors orders I quit cold turkey and didn't go back. I'm better off without them.

Exercise has been my salvation. endorphins from 1 to 2 hours running a day keeps me sane.

Was just thrown for a loop when dumped on New Years Day. Last 6 month have been bad again.

A friend recently gave me a book to read... very good. mindfullness based cognative therapy for depression. Haven't finished it yet, but the idea is to use meditation to clear ALL thoughts from your head so as to stop the depression from making you focus on the bad and break the cycle. Seems to give me some hope. Works much better than the drugs. Relief is instantaneous. I am learning to notice and be able to shift my mind at will. Also if you find a situation that triggers difficulty for you, change your life to avoid the triggers. That may be a major change but what do you have besides your life? Aren't you worth it?

Answer 3

Well I don't know if you're depressed clinically or just bummed about something like a girl, family issues, or what ever. If it's the latter of the two I recommend taking up a sport, activity or hobby, lift weights, or exercise as it naturally produces endorphins, which is the body's own natural "happy" chemical. Kava Kava is a natural plant extract that is over the counter and it promotes a sense of calm well being, but OTC remedies work for some, but not others. It's hard to say "do this" or "do that" without knowing what the root of the problem is, maybe you know.... if so try to find a way to address that issue. If it's a chemical imbalance, it may require some medication, you could visit your primary care doctor for "allergies" and speak with the doctor about what's going on,but not if your depression isn't the result of a medical issue as opposed to a person, event, or other such occurance. I am guessing if you're depressed you may spend a lot of time dwelling on what makes you unhappy, isoating yourself, and giving yourself the "poor me" type of treatment, and my opinion is that only compounds the issue, get out there with some friends, do things you enjoy, I'm not sure what else to tell you.

Answer 4

I was on an antidepressant for 38 years before someone figured out I was bipolar. Perhaps you have the wrong diagnosis.

The other thing is you CAN change your brain chemistry. I did! But it takes a lot of work on your part. You have to choose to be happy. Sometimes that means faking it until it really happens.

First try going to bed at night and thinking about each and everything you have to be grateful for. It's hard to be depressed when you are grateful for your health, your sister, your brother, your parents, the place you live, the pet that makes you laugh, your car, the food you had to eat today.... It's OK if you fall asleep doing this. It puts your mind to work over night thinking about good things rather than bad things.

Second, find your faith. And ask for help and guidance during the day. Also give thanks for every thing that happens during your day as it happens. You don't have to do this out loud.

Make gratitude and faith priorities. And help other people. This isn't a quick fix. But it works. It's called cognitive restructuring.

I was actually able to get off of 2 of the 3 meds I was taking because of the exact same routine I explained above.

Best wishes!

Answer 5

Listen...don't let anyone tell you it is in your head. I have been diagnosed as having Borderline Personality Disorder for a good three years or so now. I have been on medication and been through therapy. I can honestly say that the combination was one of the best things for me. Now, I have had my fair share of meds that did not work. Right now I am on a combination that works very well. If you really feel the need to, seek therapy - but the right type of therapy. There are several out there such as cognitive, or behavioral. Also remember if you do not like your therapist/psychologist you can switch. Many people do NOT understand any sort of mental condition, but there are many people who do and group support is good too. So, keep that chin up! I have been down a rough road and I fought this! So can you!

Answer 6

I was diagnosed with depression 30 years ago. It's part of my personality. There are lots of meds you can take. Ask tour doctor. And as hard as it is to get out of bed in the morning, I've found that that's the best thing for me. Get up, shower, face the day. I could stay in bed the rest of my life, but that would be pretty miserable. You might want to look for a therapy group. It's good to know that you're not alone.

Answer 7

I came to this website looking for the same answer ....for about 1 year I am living like a plant or maybe worst.O dont go out,I am always feeling afraid of leaving my house and when I do it has to be at night.I lost my job and I am living on my savings.I cant even go out look for a job.I am sleeping only a few hours at nigh,I am irritated and sometimes I blow up with my wife without reason....I never went to a doctor and I never took any medicine.I had thoughts about suicide long time ago but I spent some time on a church and thank God at leat I dont think about it anymore.I am 26 years old and I am married for 5 years..with no kids..I just dont know to expect ..everything sounds bad and looks bad...Is very hard to live like that,I dont wanna do anything....

I am sorry I cant help you,I am just replying because I want to share my feelings and maybe get some help here...lets pray!!!I hope you get better my friend!
And if anyone have any tips to help us please post here.Thanks!

Answer 8

I have been suffering from general anxiety and severe depression for more than 10 years now, I have seen a therapist for just over 5 years, been on max doses of different medications, been singled out at school for related reasons, so I do know exactly what you mean. Depression is not a choice, clinical depression is an imbalance of the chemicals in the brain. It runs in my family in different forms, and hits randomly at first. Now I have a husband who is manic depressive and then there is our son. He is too young to have anything show up yet, but it is highly likely because of both parents having depression problems that he will have some kind of problem with depression and I worry about that. But in the mean time I have not taken any depression medication for 3 years now, once I got pregnant with my son and now with trying to conceive again. I still am not up to par with where I should be because I think mine is not just chemical, it is my surroundings, my family and my friends. Within 5 years I lost 3 uncles, my father and my grandfather from the closer family in my day to day life. I am facing losing my grandmother and my husband's grandmother soon too. I won't be out of the woods anytime soon, but my love for my husband and son help me, knowing that my son is totally dependant on us is what makes me do what I have to and it keeps me busy enough to not think about these things as often as I had been.
You do still have a future that can be brighter, maybe you just haven't found the right combination of meds and psych help. Maybe you need more intense therapy of some kind, but there is a light at the end of your tunnel you just need to keep searching for it and asking for help anyway you can get it.

Best of luck to you and I hope you find the help you really need.

Answer 9

"I figure, if I could ask the wrld, then why not? Maybe there might be some help for me out there..."
This is a good start. It's good that you take action and ask.

And please don't listen to "...depression is by choice, that Im making my self feel sad..."

I am not sure if chemical imbalance causes your depression, did you ask your psychiatrist?

I think for depression, when one is taking medication, it's more effective, if you go see **counsellor at the same time. They can sometimes inspire you about different perspective and blind spots.

Answer 10

I used to be the same way pretty much my whole life. They put me on meds too, but they put me on the wrong ones, so it made the situation worse. You should ask the doctor if something else might work. I definitely feel your pain, but things can look up. It's been about 3 years for me since I have been severely depressed and though I am still dealing with some issues and still depressed....life isn't so bad. It takes some work to feel better, but it's worth it. Good luck!