No matter what I am doing I keep thinking about the ex. The ex says he still loves me....what should I do. My heart and my head can't figure it out.
2006-06-29 07:58:59 · 30 answers · asked by TextnQueen 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Seems your heart and your head is looking the same way.
What's to figure out?
2006-06-29 08:01:19 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your ex sounds controlling. Who broke up with whom? To quote Montell Williams, "An ex is an EX for a reason." If it didn't work out, it wasn't meant to be. But that's not always the case. Sometimes, two people are supposed to be together and they just haven't figured it out yet. I think, in my unprofessional opinion, that people often break up mostly because we expect "perfection" from our honeys. But if we get over that, we see that the person we love is imperfect and that's perfectly normal.... As for the visions during sex, girl, it happens. I'm soooo in love with my new bf, but still randomly have daydreams about my ex-friend with benefits during..... It means nothing, but we put too much emphasis on it, making it into a bigger deal than it really is. If you love the new guy, stick with him. If you feel strongly about your ex, go with him. It's ultimately your decision. But I don't recommend seeing two at once. Someone is bound to get hurt. Good luck!
2006-06-30 17:22:09 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are probably any number of good reasons why your ex is, in fact, your ex. Do not mistake you fantasies about him as an authentic desire to rekindle your relationship. Also, do not mistake your fantasies as a sign that your present relationship is inadequate.
No matter how bad a relationship has gone, all of us can find something that was good to remember...something that we miss about that relationship. The simple fact is that most of us do not give ourselves enough time to grieve an old relationship before moving on to a new one. So, what happens is that we continue our grieving process even as we are trying to build a new relationship. This can make things quite complicated.
Were there good things in the old relationship? Of course, there were. Otherwise, it wouldn't have lasted as long as it did. But remembering those things and even fantasizing about those things does NOT under any circumstances mean you should go back to that relationship. Old relationships are like old mistakes: if you've made a mistake once, why would you want to repeat it?
Give yourself time to grieve for the old relationship, to acknowledge to yourself what was good about it, and to reach a more balanced understanding both of what was good and bad in it, but also of what finally ended it. Above all, do not let your sense of loss, your memories, or your fantasies poison your present relationship. What you fantasize about is your private business. Just because you think of a thing does not mean you either have to do it or that you have to tell someone about it.
2006-06-29 15:13:24 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
think of the reasons y ur noth with ur ex and i'm sure u know it's gonna take a while to get ur ex of of ur head, my ex says he still loves me and wants to be with me, we broke it was almost 3 years ago and i'm happily married and never think about my ex during sex, i only think of him as a friend. Stay with ur new man for now, but if this continues then talk to ur ex and talk about what ya'll should do. Good Luck
2006-06-29 15:03:56 · answer #4 · answered by Jen S 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was with my ex for ten years and it's been almost 7 years since, and I still think of him. We have both moved on but I wish I could have realize when I was with him how special he was. I truly loved him and I regret letting him go. You will only love once like this so don't let him get away.
2006-06-29 15:08:47 · answer #5 · answered by September 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well this sounds realy tough, i think if you told him this already, wich it sounds like u did, and he was understanding and still loves you, then don't leave him, but figure out why you are thinking about him, if it's that you guys just broke it off a little while ago, then thats natural, you'll get over it, but if it's been like 6 months, then you should start thinking about sitting down with the guy you are with right now and having some talks, mabey the openes of your realationship will bring you closer to him, cus openes always makes a realationship realy good. now if you havent told the guy you are with that you are thinking of your ex during sex, then you might want to start thinking about telling him gentaly, and if he isn't sopurtive, then you might want to think about going bak to your ex, cuas it seems to me like you stillhave feelins for him
2006-06-29 15:08:56 · answer #6 · answered by nicolieo16@yahoo.com (nikki) 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like deep inside, you still have feelings for him. Probably the best thing to do is (if u want to) get a break from ur boyfriend...and start hanging out with ur ex to see where ur heart truly belongs. Best of luck
2006-06-29 15:02:03 · answer #7 · answered by JOLIE69 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why is he the X ? There has to be a reason, and if that reason is valid maybe he should stay the X, as for the new guy don't tell him just enjoy the sex and think about whoever you want!
2006-06-29 15:02:33 · answer #8 · answered by me4tennessee 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you don't love the man you are with right now then move on but don't go back to your ex. You left him for a reason so move on.
2006-06-29 15:01:39 · answer #9 · answered by bubbles26 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's actually normal.
You made a soul-connection with your ex and it's normal to still have those moments during passion with your current guy.
2006-06-29 15:01:14 · answer #10 · answered by drsteve362005 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋