He is starting to take me forgranted because he thinks that I will always be here for him, and that in a few years we will get engaged and then get married. I am really really upset!!! Because I want to make him know that I am devoted to him and that I love him, but I guess in a way it has backfired on me. I just want to put him on his toes a bit, so he tries just as hard as he used to, to make sure that I'm not going anywhere, instead of just assuming.
2006-06-29 06:22:54 · 21 answers · asked by Green Tea Happy 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I have talked to him about this. But he says that he's not taking me for granted, then he's like besides if we were married, this happens to married people sometimes. AHHHH!!! He thinks what he's doing is competely fine, and he thinks that his lack of affection at times is fine, just because he isn't a very emotional person all the time. I really dont' know what to do. I dont' want to loose him, but so confused...
2006-06-29 06:31:03 · update #1
Be more independant. Don't spend all your free time with and the best thing to do is just tell him how you feel. If he's the one, he will understand and things will work out.
2006-06-29 06:25:22 · answer #1 · answered by billgutsky 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First: Don't do anything drastic like flirting with other guys. You want him to appreciate you, not hate you. That being said, I'd just go the direct route and tell him you're feeling a bit insecure about your relationship with him. At the most, you could hint that you're not feeling so great about the two of you and that might get him to pay a bit more attention. In general I guess, do what you have to, but BE careful. These kinds of games can readily get out of hand.
2006-06-29 13:26:04 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Once you start playing games it can only create more games....which in games sometimes you win and sometimes you lose. Are you willing to lose? Sometimes feeling taken for granted is only because a sense of security has taken its place. Security can be a good feeling.....you should just tell him you are feeling this way and if you have been together this long obviously he must care! The new does wear off, but is replaced by other wonderful feelings also.
2006-06-29 13:28:59 · answer #3 · answered by Geez Louise 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you enjoy the chase more than the relationship.
True love is mutual. And if you want your boyfriend to love you more, then you have to love him more too.
I don't think it's a good idea to break up with your boyfriend a little bit and make him chase you some more.
If it's marriage he is thinking about, then he definitely values stabililty and security in his relationship with you. And if you are going to make him feel insecure, then he may decide that you are not the right woman for him and start looking for someone else.
2006-06-29 13:35:13 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave him...that will shake up his pants. If he does not respond, then you are better off in the long run. If he get the message make sure he and any other boyfriend you may have understand that you think too much of yourself to be taken for granted. Always remember...if anyone treat you as a pushover...it's because you are.
2006-06-29 13:32:09 · answer #5 · answered by Robere 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hold up wait a minute......
You have a guy who is talking about spending the rest of his life with you, and you want to @#$# it up?
What's wrong with you?
How much more trying do you want him to do?
Granted we guys may skimp on the little things after awhile, but do women realize what we do in exchange?
If he's trying to reconfigure his life from "his" and "yours" into an eventual "ours" SHUT UP AND APPRECIATE IT!!!
It seems to me from your explanation, that you are the one who is taking HIM for granted.
Did you ever stop and think....(Probably not,) that he may be putting so much time and energy into building a life for the two of you, that he doesn't realize he's missing the small (relatively unimportant) stuff????
Try explaining it to him, but don't be surprised if he gets pissed off and stops trying completely for a while. You've already irritated me and I'm not even involved in the situation!
2006-06-29 13:33:05 · answer #6 · answered by blackwolf917 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't wait on him hand and foot. Go out with the girls. Go away somewhere without him. Get some guy friends and hang with them.
Sounds like he does take you for granted, and this could lead to possessiveness and controlling behavior in his part.
I thought I had a girl for life. We went out one night, she talked to a guy at the bar, next thing i knew she broke up with me and married him 8 months later.
2006-06-29 13:26:39 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Haha there are allot of things you can do. One is flirt it will make him realize that you can have allot of different guys if you wanted. another way is to go out allot maybe with a few of your friends without him after a while he will get the point. But it won't happen over night.
2006-06-29 13:27:49 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
why do they do that????? well I think that sometimes they just feel so darn comfortable that they forget....so put on your cutest dress next time you go out anywhere!!!! once he sees how many guys check you out and girls give you jealous looks ......he will wake up!!!! men are visual creatures.....sometimes they need to see the hottest version of you to get it.
always put yourself first, be confident in yourself, do something different make some new friends on your own........and do not forget this is your life and you should ALWAYS make sure you get the most of it.
2006-06-29 13:36:19 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take your free evening once a week ..... take a free weekend with a friend to travel somewhere ..... develop a personal hobby which needs contacts with other persons like chess, music, spiritual activities (just something, he doesn't really like but you enjoy)
2006-06-29 13:28:21 · answer #10 · answered by consultant_rom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋