She is an older twin and throws fits and acts up all the time over everything!!! Her twin sister is the exact opposite. Always well behaved. I call them night and day. Can anyone help me???
2006-06-29 04:17:58 · 29 answers · asked by Nikki S 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
she's looking for attention. obviously you make her feel like she's trouble by calling them night and day. if you're constantly praising the 'good' twin, then the other will act out for sure. give her some attention. talk to her and spend some one on one time... she needs it.
2006-06-29 04:20:39 · answer #1 · answered by gummi bear 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a friend who has a twin sister too. she's totally opposite from the sister. though she's all grown up now and more matured now, she still has those traits in her. how old are your daughters? beating her up or ignoring her ain't gonna solve it. beating her up will make her growing up hating you all along, especially if there are scars on her along the way. likewise, if you ignore her, she'll think you favor the other twin and love her less - that ain't good either.
the best way is try to talk to her to understand why is she behaving so rancidly. try to tell her that if she behaves well like her sister, and do well in school, you'll reward something like a toy or something. and tell her that you love both of them equally but if she keeps throwing fits and act up, then she'll only making you loving the other twins more than her. it's her choice.
though there's a saying of "Spare the rod, spoil the child", spanking is not always the best solution.
2006-06-29 11:45:36 · answer #2 · answered by jay-z 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well first she may do that because she feels like she doesn't get enough positive reinforcement, and she may act out like that because she figures if you aren't proud of her, at least she will get your attention. Maybe you should try making sure you balance attention between the two. Give her compliments on her positive personality traits, not saying to not discipline her but what I am saying is make sure you equally let her know how proud you are of the things she does well. Also try spliting time, I mean like, do things that both of your daughters like to do, let the one that acts out pick sometimes and let the other pick sometimes. I'm not sure that this is the problem, but a lot of time in a twin situation they are complete opposites, and it is for the fact that eventually one child is always being praised and the other is always being punished, so eventually acting out is the onlly way for them to get any form of attention, and it becomes routine. I hope this helped. Good Luck!
2006-06-29 11:22:23 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am a twin. My twin was that way. Ignoring works best. Explain to her that whe she acts like that she won't get anything at all. Most important, do not give in to her demands or the behavior will continue. Let her calm down, and then talk to her. Communicate why it's bad behavior, and when she does it, tell her it's wrong and then ignore her. She will eventually calm herself. When she does stop, tell her again that it is not acceptable that she acts that way and what you want her to do instead of being a brat.
Good luck!
2006-06-29 11:27:02 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
im a daughter and i dont throw fits... its probably because she thinks you cant understand her and is frustrated all the time because of little things that u might not notice. you could ask the day twin why the night twin is so moody. maybe u treat the twins differently. if u treat the night twin like she's a good great beautiful daughter, she will become one.
2006-06-29 11:23:49 · answer #5 · answered by kay 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try ignoring her when she is acting up. It sounds like she is looking for attention. Kids sometimes think yelling and kicking is a sure fire way of getting their parents attention. Just go to another room (not to far away) when she does this. It might take a few days but she will finally see that she's not getting the attention she used to get. Don't praise her when she stops having a fit. Just go about your normal day. Good luck. It will make you feel like a bad mother, but your not.
2006-06-29 11:23:10 · answer #6 · answered by christy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know it seems as though your daughter is trying to hold your attention when she acts up, maybe because the other twin is good all the time, maybe she feels as though she is not getting the same attention, i would sit her down and let her know that this kind of behaviour is not acceptable, also ask her if there is anything bothering her, and reasurre her that you love her, but wont tolerate this behaviour, if the behaviour continues try ignoring it hopfully she will get fed up with her behaviour not being noticed.
2006-06-29 12:40:08 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was like that and now I'm the most wonderful adult. Lemme guess, the 'good one' is like beautiful and butter wouldn't melt? Yea?
Ok, ok, look, Solomon said two things. First, spare the rod and spoil the child. Second, and I forget the exact words, but he said be sweet with them. I interpret thus- if my daughter is naughty I first off give her a little smack. But if she seems as if she's being pushed so hard that she rebels then I just go, 'oh, honey; you're such a good girl', and I *forget* about what ever she's done. She responds well to that. She *is* a good girl.
2006-06-29 11:29:16 · answer #8 · answered by welcome_to_how_things_will_be 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is the older twin, a-lot of older siblings feel this way. Not just twins, they feel as if they have to be the mature one all the time and look out for the younger ones, it's almost built into their intellectual being.
2006-06-29 11:20:35 · answer #9 · answered by john's brat 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ignore her behavior and put her in time out when she throws her fits and only reward her when she behaves she knows that her acting out gets her attention so she will continue but negative attention is not the right kind of attention
2006-06-29 11:21:42 · answer #10 · answered by toosexy4thisshit 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋