my son is 12 will be 13 in sept is it to late to give him a sister or brother.?

Answer 1

The real question is how old are you? I'd say past 30, is a little late. And if you feel you are ready to have another child when you already have a 13 year old, maybe you started too early.

But thats just how I feel. Why don't you ask your son what he thinks.

Answer 2

Helping Children Adjust to a New Sibling
Most children welcome new siblings with a mixture of positive and negative emotions and behaviors. They may show pride and affection toward their new brother or sister, but they may also feel jealous or left out. Experts believe that children between 18 and 36 months have the most difficult time adjusting to new babies. Children in this age group are aware of how life is changing for them but they do not yet have the social or cognitive skills to handle the frustration of the situation.

Regardless of the age of your child, it is important to prepare each member of the family for the new arrival. There are many ways in which parents can help their children learn how to adjust to the new addition to the family. Siblings are more likely to get along if the parents show they value this new relationship.

If your family is planning to make any room or bed changes when the baby arrives, the sooner this is done, the better. Many children feel that the new baby is going to take their place. Extra love and reassurance will help him or her let go of this fear.

Read books with your children about new babies and allow time for questions and concerns to be shared. Teach children the way they should behave with the new baby by focusing on the ways in which they can interact and have a safe and enjoyable time together.

Because of this big adjustment, parents should expect some changes in a child's behavior or personality. Parents may recognize regression, the appearance of behaviors a child has previously outgrown. This behavior is perfectly normal. There may be more toileting accidents and difficulty at bedtime. Remember these behaviors are only temporary.

After the new baby is born, let the older children visit as soon as possible. It is a good idea to let the older siblings make a gift to give to the baby at the hospital. Some families refer to this day as the baby's first birthday, so the older children understand why the baby is getting so many gifts. You may want to keep a stash of small presents at home for the other children, for those times when visitors arrive with presents for the new baby.

Once you get home, include older siblings as much as possible. Even young children can help with bath time, assist in dressing the baby, or get diapers or burping towels. This instills a sense of accomplishment for the older kids. Even if it takes a little more time, it will be well worth it. On the other hand, if your child chooses to ignore the baby, do not force involvement.

Feeding time is a typical time for children to be more demanding. Make this a special quiet time by reading books together while the baby is eating. The older children will feel included and will be occupied. Everyone will benefit from the time spent reading together as a family. Parents want to let children know that every member of the family is worthy of their love and attention.

Answer 3

13th Birthday? Give him an iPod, far less trouble; or a mobile phone so he can talk to friends his own age. You don't have children for the sake of other children. But maybe the question was:-

"How will our 13yr old son react if we have another baby now, will it cause problems?"

At 13 he may not be able to relate to a baby, he may dive in and be the "best big brother - ever". At 13 he is going to be seeking attention and going through his teens right at the point all your attention could be on a little one.

If you want one then you want one, don't do it for him; but you are right to consider the impact. If you want one then don't worry, things have a way of working out and in a loving environment a baby is a manifestation of that love.

I can only base this on my experience, I was 9 when my brother was born, we didn't have a thing in common then, we don't now.

I'm not saying don't do it, babies are wonderful; it's only when they become children they are horrors. :-)


Good Luck.

Answer 4

it is never too late, but THINK about this long and hard before you decide to get pregnant. You are 5 years away from freedom, 9 years max if he goes to college. If you have another child now, you get to start all over from scratch and trust me a LOT has changed since the last time you went thru the diaper and bottle routine, plus the fact you yourself are older and the sleep deprivation is more taxing as you get older.

Take it from one who knows, the children will tolerate one another, but not ever really get along as they will both suffer from what I refer to as only child syndrome, plus the fact that there will be almost 14 years age difference between them.

If you decide to do this, you will find yourself sitting at your son's HS or College graduation and thinking to yourself, if I had just quit with him, I would be done now. It is an awful feeling to have, you don't wish that you had never had your youngest child, you just seriously doubt your judgment at the time.

Answer 5

My only sister was born when I was 11. I am 24 today and she is barely stepping into her teens. It has always been very difficult for us to communicate with each other let alone be more of sisters. I love her... but at no point of our lives have we been at the same levels or phases of lives in which we could relate to each other. Also it was difficult to allow another sibling into my life after being completely used being on my own and my toys and room to myself. It wa good to learn that but it was difficult to adjust to.

If you wanna do it... do it for yourself...... but I dont think it will make the kids life any easier especially if there are no siblings in between to bridge the gap between the eldest and the youngest. I know our mother really wanted her after her miscarriage when I was a 5year old. Get your reasons right.

Answer 6

Not really, I had a friend and she was in 7th grade (about the age of 13) her mom had another baby and she was fine with it, infact she was very protective.
If you really want another baby go ahead, infact it might be easier for you son now that he's older, he's also old enough to learn how to take care of a baby, it would be good for his future family, he'll already know a little something about babies, and he can currently take some responsiblity for the new baby.

Answer 7

There are 12 years between my oldest sister and I.
Have a child because you want one or don't have a child because you don't want one.
Don't make a discission like that based on anything outside your relationship with the other parent. You're not just "giveing him a sister or brother" your giveing the next child parents.

Answer 8

Nope! My son is 13 and is very excited over our expecting twins!

Just make sure that the baby has a separate room from him - at his age, he's too old to have a baby in his room. Kids closer in age are ok together, as they have more in common.

Answer 9

My mom gave me a baby sister when I was 11 yrs. old & I couldn't have been happier. Not only were we always very close, but you get an instant helper built into the family. I ADORED taking care of my little sister! As long as you're physically & mentally ready for it - I don't see why you shouldn't go for it!

Answer 10

NO!

Just let your son know that you are wanting to have another baby. Since he is older he will be so much help to you when the new baby arrives.