My boyfriend and I want to legally get married now so that we can get more money from the military and therefore save to have our BIG catholic wedding. And I mean BIG. I have a HUGE family. We are planning to have our wedding next July. Will being legally married first change anything in our catholic ceremony? Will we still be able to have the same type of ceremony? All answers would be greatly appreciated. I've posted on Catholic forums and have not received any replies. Thanks again!
2006-06-28 09:32:28 · 13 answers · asked by your_caligirl 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
The church will welcome your effort to sanctify your marriage. To the church, the civil ceremony is pretty meaningless, so they will consider that you are not married until you do it with your priest.
What I THINK may happen is that the priest will probably expect your to confess the fact that you have been "living in sin." If he does, then you will be expected to do an Act of Contrition (as you would for any confession) and do your atonement. All of this part should be private, between you and God.
Your wedding ceremony should be like any other. However, I know the Catholic mass is different for gajillions of different reasons and ocassions. I wouldn't worry. If there is any difference, it will be transparent to most people present. Talk to the priest if you are concerned. If there is a passage or two that calls attention to your previous legal state, maybe you can ask him to do that part in Latin.
2006-06-28 09:44:01 · answer #1 · answered by Vince M 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Responding as a Catholic
NO you cannot do that. You would be barred from the sacraments until your marriage is con validated.
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Also I check through some sources....I am afraid that you are out of luck on doing a "Second Wedding"/"Renewal of vows".
Canon 1127 §3.
It is forbidden to have another religious celebration of the same marriage to give or renew matrimonial consent before or after the canonical celebration according to the norm of §1 [i.e., the Catholic wedding]. Likewise, there is not to be a religious celebration in which the Catholic who is assisting and a non-Catholic minister together, using their own rites, ask for the consent of the parties.
I suggest that you just have a really fancy 1 year anniversary where you invite all your friends...it would also be a good way to explain a thing or two about the Catholic faith and the seriousness that it places on the "I do", so much so that you can only do it once.
2006-06-28 10:46:36 · answer #2 · answered by Liet Kynes 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well I'm not Catholic but I heard a co-worker talking about her son's wedding. (They are catholic). They got legally married by a judge but weren't allowed to take of communion until the marriage was blessed by the priest or something like that. They had to have their catholic wedding before the priest would bless their marriage. Sorry I don't know much. Hope it helped some!
2006-06-28 09:38:04 · answer #3 · answered by BeC 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm, I don't think its looked highly upon...
That being said, I am not familiar with any Church teaching on that subject specifically. However, after the civil 'marriage', you would only possess the benefits granted by the state, not by God. You would not be able to participate in conjugal union until the actual Sacrament of Marriage, which would occur in the Church.
So, if you needed to because of the benefits, then go for it. If you are just doing it so you can have a big wedding, that is probably leaning towards vanity and I would advise against it.
2006-06-28 09:39:38 · answer #4 · answered by renaissance_man_1981 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi,
You may get married in a catholic ceremony, but there will be a issue of your souls marked by what the church might consider a mortal sin. This would require confessions to a priest before taking the eucharist. If, you are having your marriage blessed by a "stickler" priest,he may insist that you abstain from intercourse while you are not married in the eyes of the church. Also, intercourse without the intention of bearing children is forbidden.
Your civil marriage should carry no weight on the decsions that the church makes. I sure would like to know what the priests have to say. (Hint: I was married by a priest from Opus Dei, and the rules were set out quite clearly. It wasn't much fun waiting for the big day.)
StewE
2006-06-28 09:48:01 · answer #5 · answered by Gone 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not according the churches teachings but then it will depend on which priest you go to ask. Some will let it go and some will not. Just the nature of the beast so to say. Like some priests will tell you that you have to go to the confessional and confess your sins to be forgiven but some I have heard say you don't have to do that but go to God. And I was always taught they are god. So it depends on the priest you go to whether it will be accepted or not so best check first or you may be disbarred from getting communion, getting a church wedding, or any of a number of other things. Some that I have known were married in a civil service and then they could not be married in the church. Lots of extra expense for something that you have already done but to each his own.
2006-06-28 09:48:06 · answer #6 · answered by ramall1to 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A marriage is a marriage in the Catholic eyes.
The marriage is blessed when a Catholic Priest bears witness to the marriage. Most Priest will require counseling and for the matrimony to be in a holy place ... I don't know of too many who are gung-hoe about attending a court marriage, but it is possible. You could ask your priest. Worst case scenerio, they'll no, but they WILL help you in blessing the marriage.
PS Congradulations!!!
2006-06-28 09:39:13 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly, if you get married now and you plan on getting married by church next year for the sole purpose of having a big party, then you're not getting married because you love each other but because you want a big ceremony. I can understand the situation but if you want to get married by church you have to remember that divorce is not an option. Search the bible and you will find the answers.
2006-06-28 09:44:03 · answer #8 · answered by kermet_da_frog69 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As far as I know it's fine! Just remember that you aren't bound in marriage by God yet, and all the little details of what can happen *after* marriage only happen after the actual sacrament of matrimony. ^___^
2006-06-28 09:36:29 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As far as I know, it shouldn't change anything about your Religious ceremony if you are already legally married
2006-06-28 09:36:28 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋