I have a very VERY picky eater (my 2 yr old daughter)- I cannot get her to try anything!! Any suggestions??

Question

I cannot get her to even eat a p b & J !! no sandwiches at all!! I have tried shapes and colors, but no avail!!! What else can I do ?

Answer 1

You should definitely pick up all of the books written by renowned family nutritionist Ellyn Satter! I can summarize her main points for you here but you will be much more informed and prepared if you read them yourself and you'll be astonished at how well her methods work! I am a preschool teacher and I teach in the 2-year-old room and we use her method as part of our curriculum. Kids who practically starve themselves at home or refuse to eat anything but candy or hot dogs try everything and usually like it too when they're in class. Its amazing. First serve meals family style. Put smallish serving bowls (larger cereal bowls work well for this) on the table, each one filled with what you have prepared. Make sure everything is cut into small enough pieces ALREADY, not after your daughter puts it on her plate, so that she's not frustrated by the food she can't deal with. This will give her a lot of confidence and satisfaction, already opening her to the idea of putting it in her mouth. Put regular sized spoons in the bowls to serve. This may frustrate YOU (yes you'll be serving yourself at the table from these too, and anyone else in your family who shares the meal table) but will make her feel in-control, confident, self sufficient and able. Let her choose what she eats and how much. Its scary I know, but she WILL make good choices for her body after she is able to explore the new foods on her own terms. You don't need to force her to eat anything, and never scoop anything onto her plate unless she asks you to. Trust her, it will take awhile but it DOES work. Lead her by example. She may choose to put 5 scoops of mac and cheese on her plate and 0 scoops of peas. That's ALRIGHT! You may choose to put peas AND carrots AND salad AND mac and cheese on your plate. This will fascinate her because even though you may not know it, she is ALWAYS watching you, even if she pretends not to. That YOU seem to enjoy those gross looking green things is going to eventually make her too curious to resist. She may start out just by putting ONE pea on her plate and then not eating it. She's acclimating herself to the fact that its something to eat, possibly even a yummy thing to eat. You don't need to make a big production out of it, and you shouldn't. Don't hype the fact that you are eating peas and don't hype it when she does either unless she looks for recognition for it ("look mommy I ate one! It was yummy!) then feel free to respond by acknowledging that she tried something new "Hey you did eat one! What did you think about it?" But its not necessary to go crazy like "WOW Lizzie! You ate a pea! Good for you! What a good girl you are! That's fantastic". If you think about it you can see how that could lead to some food issues later in life lol! Avoid talking about dieting or your own issues with food in front of her. Meals should be a low pressure, low stress time (this is definitely one of those fake it till you make it things!) where she should feel comfortable with what and how she eats. Show her table manners by using them yourself. If she needs to eat with her hands for some things (like peas, they're tricky) offer her her spoon or fork, but don't force it on her. "Lizzie, would you like to use your fork?" She can say no! Is she really going to be eating with her hands when she's 20 simply because she needed to sometimes due to her motor development when she was 2,3,4 or 5? Heck No! Is it possible for 2 year olds to serve themselves?! Yes absolutely! I eat with 12 2-year-olds every day and they all serve themselves (I pour the milk, but they say "when") It can get messy but that's what cleaning up is for. Offer her help if it looks like she needs it, but respect her words if she turns it down and keeps trying on her own. She'll be able to conquer any food before you know it! Definitely get those books if you can though and if not try visiting her website (www.ellynsatter.com) or checking them out at the library. Good luck and don't worry! She'll won't starve or develop malnutrition in the meantime I promise!

Answer 2

Everyone else's answers all seem to be the commando approach. I have a 3 1/2 year old son who is very picky as well and have found that with him, subtle and mellow tactics work best. I tell him what's on the menu and that I am not making anything else in a friendly, yet firm voice and tell him that it is his choice whether he eats or not. I do not threaten him. I do not tell him that the food I prepare is all he will eat until he eats it either. This approach was complimented by my pediatrician, who has stated that children are like animals and they will eat when they are hungry. He also said not to worry if the child misses a meal. They have enough body weight to sustain them during their time of resistence. But, be sure to keep your daughter hydrated. Good luck, and know that eventually she will grow out of this phase and move on to her next opposition. :)

Answer 3

First of all, she's 2 yrs old and at that age they go through stages like this. If you want her to try new things, try simple foods that don't look weird or interesting to her. For breakfast, give her something like a bowl of dry cereal and a sliced up banana. For lunch, try putting some plain lunch meat on her plate and some crackers and let her make her own little sandwiches. For dinner, it's going to be harder because you have to find things that she as well as you will eat. Try taking a breaded chicken breast patty (you can buy those in a bag in the frozen food section at the store) and for you put some spaghetti sauce and mozzerella cheese on top but for her just give her the chicken patty and let her dip it in ketchup. And if all else fails, let her help you cook her meals. If she gets to make her lunch and dinner then she should be excited to try what she has made!

Answer 4

If she gets hungry enough, she will eat. It's that simple. I have been through the terrible 2's twice now. I simply didn't give my kids an option, they ate what was put in front of them. It didn't take them long to figure out I meant business. I do not have the time to fix a seperate meal for someone who's being picky. Your daughter is not going to starve if she is stubborn and refuses to eat a meal or two. Most 2 year olds don't eat a lot any how, or at least it seems to go in spruts, where they eat A LOT for a couple days, then go back to taking a couple of bites.
I don't know how you handle her when she doesn't eat, but if you do cater to her and fix her what she wants, you are just setting yourself up for disaster. Kids are smart, they figure out how to manipulate early.

Answer 5

I have the same problem w/ my 3 year old son. For the longest time I just fixed him what he wanted, but I got tired of fixing 2 or 3 different meals (I have a 1 yr old too). Anyway, my friend's 2 year old came over one night, and she brought a bowl of what they had for dinner & said, she can't have any treats w/ the other kids until she eats her dinner. So, all night the dinner sat there until I brought out the pop-corn to snack on. When she asked for some, I told her "Mommy said you can't have any until you eat your dinner". What do you know, she ate her dinner (at least most of it).
SO, I started doing that w/ my son. There are still some nights that he won't eat dinner, but one meal isn't going to kill him. My Dr. says it's perfectly fine, and is a great way to get him to try different foods. Like the other guy said, if they try the food & genuinly don't like it, they don't have to eat it. But I'd say 9/10 times he ends up eating most of the meal.
Good luck!

Answer 6

Some of it is being 2. Give her whatever you are eating at mealtime. Tell her she has to take one bite in order to get something that is her favorite. My son is also 2 and loves Popsicles, so that is what we use. Don't worry about sandwiches, my son is just now getting to eat some sandwiches. I give him his favorite meat, cheese and crackers or a lunchable. You can continue to offer sandwiches, but don't worry about it. Also, my doctor says it is very normal for 2 year olds to not eat much anyway. Your daughter will eat when she needs to.

Answer 7

My 4 year old has been picky since he turned 1. (my 2 year old eats or at least trys everything and anything!) He has gotten somewhat better in the past year. (has never liked any kind of pasta, mac n cheese, etc) He will now eat peanut butter and strawberry fluff on potato bread, Purdue Dinosaur chicken nuggets, apple slices diped in peanut butter. He loves the Cheerios with dried stawberries, so we went to Trader Joes and bought containers of just the plain dried strawberries, he loves them! He drinks carnation vanilla instant breakfast before preschool. The Stonyfield Farm drinkable yogurts are good too, they have fiber. We make english muffin pizzas for him too. You really can't make them eat, if they don't want to. Good luck!

Answer 8

I have a 4 1/2 yr old, 3 yr old and a 9 month old. I have been through your dilemma too. My kids love Spaghettios and chicken noodle soups with Dora, Batman , etc. I usually drain most of the broth after I cook it and they love the noodle shapes. How about grapes cut in half, baby carrots with ranch dressing to dip. In the refrigerated meat section at Jewel they have popcorn chicken (kind of like chicken nuggets, but with white meat), hot dogs wrapped in crescent roll dough (bake for about 5 to 10 minutes), bologna wrapped in cheese, apple sauce, mini tacos. Hope this helps

Answer 9

Put it in front of her... if she doesn't eat it/try it.. tell her she's getting it for dinner.. then breakfast.. then lunch.. and nothing else until she eats it. My parents did that with us... we'd go one meal.. that's it.. and then try it... if.. IF we honestly didn't like it.. we wouldn't have to eat it again... but the point was we tried it.
Kids get away with far too much... and many kids really know how to punch their parents buttons. YOU are the adult.. YOU say what they do and don't do, especially at that age. YOU will decide what they do and don't eat... let her go hungry for a few hours.. she'll eat it.. or at least try it.

Answer 10

We let our 3 1/2 year old dip anything and everything in Hersheys chocolate syrup. As long as he eats the good food, does it really matter what it's coated with on the way down?

Answer 11

Don't sweat it my son is 2 and all he wants to eat is hot dogs. He can eat that for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. So just go with the flow eventually she will get over that and change to something else i know he did now its french toast. Good luck