Since the age of 5, my hubby n I have talked with both of our kids about sex,?

Question

Granted it was about the "inappropriate kind" and we have answered their questions throughout them growing up as well as educated them, ie, abstinance, condoms, birth control, also all the other alternatives if that should happen, even with sex education classes through out Jr High and High School in which now a days they teach "abstinance only" which in my view is unrealistic, they also have witnessed their cousins who are numerous struggle with their kids, they all started young....Can anyone tell me if you have done all the right things to prevent them from getting in the family way, why our daughter who is 16 didn't want to listen? To what she has seen with her own eyes, or paid any mind to the education that we instructed as well as the schools?
A very frustrated soon to be grandma....Don't get me wrong we will support her and babies are a blessing........but Jeez.........They really have no clue...

Answer 1

don't beat yourself up its not your fault, you did everything right

the truth is that 60% of our 14 year olds are experimenting with sex, and no where near that many are on reliable birthcontrol... stand behind your daughter and support her she is going to need it but under no circumstances do you need to raise her child for her. the only way she will be a good mom is to do it herself.

it is time to treat her like anyother adult, tell her to get a job and support her baby, and tell her she needs to finish school, charge her for child care and housing (although given the age perhaps less than normal) and let her learn responsibility

Answer 2

First of all, abstinence only is NOT the only way things are taught. I'm only a few years removed from High School and remember very well the 5 minutes on Abstinence and the 4 day lecture on Proper Birth Control Options.

Secondly, young children will make their own decisions regardless. Perhaps you were too accepting?

Answer 3

you'll discover that she will be able to have diverse questions at diverse a lengthy time period. you're able to discover age ideal solutions, and do not provide them extra information than they want, save it short and to the point. I requested my mom even as i became 6 how might want to a lady get pregnant, because she became pregnant with my youthful brother. She defined what your era is and why we are able to get pregnant. yet no longer how he were given in there with the aid of the undeniable fact that's no longer what I requested. even as my older youthful ones requested how thier little brother or sister were given out of my abdomen, I had to grant somewhat anatomy lesson, and advised them there is yet another hollow between the bum and pee-hollow, that's linked to the position the toddler is interior, I advised them the uterus, is a particular "pouch" the position the toddler grows. lots of the time, in the adventure that they are previous adequate to ask a question, then they are previous adequate to get an answer. yet now and again they get ideas from television, or youthful ones in college that they does no longer even want to ask about in the adventure that that they had no longer heard it elsewhere. So.... there have been circumstances, when I pronounced, "you're too youthful to entice close that yet" if i did not have an "age ideal answer" Or if i really felt it would want to attend. yet that's ok too. ~once you've those little talks all alongside, then, even as she is older, she will be able to be gentle coming to you with questions, and also you'll be extra gentle, citing the concern once you sense it could be needed to ask her if she should be positioned on delivery-administration, or purchase some condoms, for instance.

Answer 4

My suggestion is that you need to sit down and talk to your daughter about what her goals in life are. If you discuss her future with her and then tell her that her actions may cause her to be pregnant and having a baby makes it harder for her to follow her dreams then maybe she will see that it is better to not have sex. Furthermore, I think that you should actually take her to a clinic, get her to talk to a doctor about STD's and its gory truth, this means with pictures, and perhaps even a few patients who have an STD and who want to tell her the truth. Also, tell her that if she gets a severe disease like AIDS or something that is harder to treat and has no cure, how miserable she will be. Those scare tatics in the 90's worked for me.

Answer 5

I don't have any kids and you might consider me to be a kid (20) but I can tell you from experience that even though you have the right resources and tools, sometimes you don't use them. Sometimes the best lesson is pain and hopefully your daughter will learn from this experience. It's not your fault, sh*t happens. My parents are great, but I have done somethings that they have warned me against. That's life. Just support your daughter.

Answer 6

...you puzzle me..., did you also talk about disease, rape, pregnancy, problems relating to teenage pregnancy (the 'physical' problems for mother and child?) Sounds like you covered the 'sex' part, but perhaps left out the consequences...
As far as abstinence...it only seems unrealistic, if a person doesn't want to do it! It's a 'choice', not a sentence...

Answer 7

You have done all you could, in my opinion. My parents told me NOTHING of sex. I had my first child at 17 by an abusive man who was 4 years older that me. Sometimes kids have to learn the hard way.

Answer 8

My mother did the exact same thing for me. I was put on the pill at 14 and ended up pregnant at 18.(Missed one pill) Just be very supportive and give your daughter all your love and care. She will need it. !! On top of you guys being disappointed in her, she is dealing with her changing body and the fact that her life is about to change forever!! Good Luck !!

Answer 9

I am sorry you are going to be a young grandmother.

Answer 10

and the question would be?