Have your kid's ever said,"I hate you!"? How did you react? What age did this happen?

Answer 1

As crazy as it sounds, if your child says "i hate you," you are doing a great job - don't change a thing. You are not there to be a freind or buddy. You are there to raise, educate, an keep safe your child. When they say they hate you, it's because you are just keeping them from doing something that would be detrimental to their well being.

My child has said it a few times, and I just respond with "thanks, and I love you."

KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK!!

Answer 2

I have three kids, 20, 18 and 17 the youngest being a girl. The boys have said "I hate you" several times over the years. The middle one is the worst. I believe I remember them saying it when they were about 7 or 8 for the first time, when they didn't get their way. When they tell me that they hate me, I usually respond with, " and I don't like you very much right now either" and walk away so they do not get a chance to get another word in or it might go on forever. By doing this they stop and think for a few minutes and usually come and appoligize before long. There have been the few times when my middle son was 15-16 that he said it and it took a few days before he came and said he was sorry but just remember they are usually just saying it out of anger. Kids are very dramatic and life can be ending one minute and couldn't be better the next.

Answer 3

Unfortunately, I have heard this all too often from my son because the first few times he said it I broke down in hysterics, and now he wants to see if he can still get the same reaction out of me. When he says it I tell him that it's OK, that I'll always love him no matter what, but that he should never hate anyone because it's not a nice word. I also usually send him to his room to let him think about what he has said, and he usually comes out saying he's sorry and that he loves me "big as the sky". Good luck, cause I know it hurts.

Answer 4

This is an acting out of frustration & not to be taken literally...usually because this is a button that when pushed will put them in charge of a situation by putting you in a state of shock & then an emotional craze...any reaction is a good reaction to them...Age could be any, because the condition of such frustration could come at any time.
It is difficult not to react irrationally, however, if you take a deep breath, put your hurt feelings aside for a moment, and in a calm tone, say something like "Wow, I'm so sorry you feel that way right now, but I love you anyway...you are the world to me...why don't you go cool off & we'll work on this better afterward"...then go take a nice hot bath & relax yourself...shake it off...& when they have toned down, find out what is getting to them so harshly, and then work on solutions.

Answer 5

My 14-year-old has been shrieking this at both my wife and me for about a year now, in between telling us she loves us dearly.
This is normal behavior. Teens are going through massive brain and body changes, and are under constant assault from newly-activated glands in their bodies. Makes 'em absolutely nuts.
The best reaction (which we discovered after much trial and error) is to simply say, "Okay." and let it roll off your back. Responding to this is like asking a drunk with the DTs to describe his pink elephants ... you'll get a lot of verbiage that ultimately adds up to "I'm not feeling right in my head just now."
Be patient. Eventually they will outgrow their condition and become more affectionate again, just before they leave home.
Mark Twain remarked, "When I was 17, my father was the stupidest man I'd ever met. When I turned 20, it was remarkable how smart that man had gotten in just three years."
Sort of says it all.

Answer 6

No, my son is too young to tell me he hates me, but my sisters kids tell her that quite alot! She looks at them and tells them she hates them too! She decided that if they are going to cop an attitude with her, she'll just cop one back. When she reacts this way, they look at her like "oh, no" then they don't say anything. I'm pretty sure I will react to this when my son says he hates me by telling him that I love him anyways! I think all kids at one time or another will tell their parents they hate them. I know I did my mom! Don't feel like they really hate you, cause they don't. They do this when they don't get what they want. Don't give in.

Answer 7

My son has never said it to me but occasionally I do get "the look of death". Usually right after I have used the word "no".

It's a given and it's going to happen in some form or another at some time or another. Ignore it and move on. It serves no purpose to reward negative behavior with attention other than to produce more negative behavior.

Answer 8

I have never has this happen with my children...
If this did happen, I would tell my child that it is okay to have feelings and want to express them, but not in that manner. I would ask why he/she felt that way and try to work out the issue. I would also teach my child alternate ways to express his/her feelings. Just don't yell or get mad...it will only give them more the reason to "hate" and they will bottle up their feelings and not talk at all. Best wishes.

Answer 9

Yes, it happens....my daughter at 16yrs. because she was upset and unhappy with me, I would not allow her to get her tongue pierced. We got Thur it.... I am the Mom and I set the rules....for what I believe is best for her as my child... It was just a passing thing....she is very happy now....that I did not let her do it! Kids Will test you....when you say no....it shows and Proves you Love them! Kids Need Rules and Tough Love! I always say back....I am sorry you feel that way...But I Love You, Always!

Answer 10

My kids are now 5 and 7 and they have occationally told me or my husband "I hate you" or "you're mean!"

Our standard response is "I love you anyway."

I never get mad or upset when they say that, they are just blowing off steam and they don't have the vocabulary yet to express themselves when they are emotional.

We have even cought them saying it to each other. They fight sometimes (of course they do!) and sometimes one will tell the other I hate you, and the other one will just say "I love you anyways"

Now that is what makes it all worth it.