together for a while, but things did not workout between both of them, they finally broke up 2 and haif years ago, i met after they broke up, we spooke on the phone for more 8month before i finally meet him physically a year ago,now we add a baby boy together,few weeks ago he ask me to marry him, am really confused, i dont know if i can ascept his first child as a step daugther,i love him.am not sure of what to do, Advice me pls
2006-06-28 02:10:21 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
i believe u shd take it slow & not rush into things... dun take ur kids as a reason to make hasty decision cuz children are God given angels that he entrust us to take care... i suggest that u sit down & hv a gd positive conversation w each other in rgds to hw u feel, what to be done, how & when... i believe communicating & proper planning is the key.. also support frm trusted friends & family members reali help alot...
2006-06-28 04:56:25 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 7⤊ 2⤋
Well First of all u should have thought about that Before you went out with him i mean u knew he had a baby with someone else and u didn't think about the long run..... so now u have a baby with this guy and just to let u know U dont HAVE to be the step mother u could just be a friend to the step daughter cuz last thing a child want is the step mother from HELL..... SO Deal with it...... Sorry but somehow that Pisses Me Off..... So u know what the little girl probably doesn't even want u as a step mother How would u feel if she told u that?...... I bet u would be hurt!!! hope No one ever does that to u'r kids!! Good Luck
2006-06-28 02:16:52 · answer #2 · answered by •°♥Ms. SeXy♥°• 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
isn't that something you should have reflected on a while back? that is your sons half sister , maybe his only sibling, you wanted the baby daddy but not the baby, that's why they call them the baby daddy, cause he already has a baby . you can't take a donkey and make a race horse out of it. you bought a donkey, if he wants to marry you, you might ought to take him up on it, because if you are so negative about taking on someone Else's offspring, that's where you are , an unwed mother with an illegitimate child, some day you may hope that someone is willing to overlook your lack of morals (unwed parent with child) if you don't marry this guy or even if you do and it doesn't work out. just because you make it sound virtuous by talking on the phone for 8 months without crawling in the sack with him, it ended up how it ended up. don't be a hypocrite.
2006-06-28 02:22:50 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly, if you are ready to have a child with a person, you should be prepared to stick with them. With maturity come responsibility. People always say that it is better to leave a person if you are not getting along, than to stay because of a child. The fact is that the most recent studies show that it is not true anymore. It is better for the child and the parents to stay together for each one of them's sake. It build better bonds between child/father, child/mother, and even father/mother. If you think you are ready for a child, then you should also be ready for the outcome and prepared to support your child in all manners.
2006-06-28 02:17:08 · answer #4 · answered by spdrmnky 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You loved him enough to have his child. Hopefully you realized that was an automatic LIFETIME commitment.
He will always be your sons father just as he will always be a father to that little girl.
Hopefully you will encourage him to be a great Daddy to BOTH.
I really don't understand your question. And choose to be a wonderful caring step parent to his little girl.
My stepmother was there for me and loved me in a way my biological mother never did. So I guess I'm partial to stepmothers.
Seems you made this choice when you choose to become pregnant and have a baby.
If you love him you will grow to love his daughter. After all she will always be part of him.
Love is always the answer! Pandora
2006-06-28 02:29:48 · answer #5 · answered by Pandora R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
before each little thing, i does no longer evaluate spending money on nutrients a waste. If I were you, i'd sit down your buddy down and talk about some issues. before each little thing, you need to be upfront such as her and tell her that there is not any longer something incorrect such as her existence. optimistic, she made some blunders alongside the way, yet she nevertheless has time to regulate and turn her existence round. 2d of all, she's previous sufficient to take responsibility for her moves. If she were given desirous about drama, she might want to stumble on a thanks to tug herself out of it. some people a twin of drama, what are you able to do? no longer something. Secondly, are not any more making all of it sound adverse. She's only going to pity herself extra. Make it sound empowering. "look at each little thing you've been through thus far, you're a survivor!" or something like that. She would not favor a guy to assist her out. "you've finished so nicely on your human being already, why upload more advantageous rigidity?" optimistic her motor vehicle were given repoed, yet this type she's helping the surroundings, she will be able to get some extra exercising, and he or she might want to even make searching for a job a dedication to accomplishing her objective of having a clean one. Thirdly, you do not should be so obtainable for her. look after your self first and superb and once you sense like it or at the same time as she extremely, extremely desires you (close lack of existence in the relations, eviction, etc) then you definately will be there for her. in the different case, only lean decrease back and enable her look after herself. people like that do not study till they have been confronted with huge disaster and performance to commence from the bottom. provide it a shot. If none of this works then i'd say you've extremely were given no longer something to sense undesirable or responsible or regretful about in putting forward see you later to the friendship.
2016-11-15 08:56:14 · answer #6 · answered by sorensen 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That little girl is his and if you truly love him then you will accept that child as your own. Being a good step-mom is cool because you get to be like a grandparent - spoil her then send her home. And won't it be fun to have a little girl too. Boys are fun but you can not fix their hair and dress them in lace. She comes as part of him (package deal) and as long as you know that he wants to be with you and no one else you will be fine and since you have a child already- the mothering should come easily.
2006-06-28 03:53:16 · answer #7 · answered by jessica 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my boyfriend has a 4 year old daughter from another marriage so i know from experience how these things go. i have no problem with the poor girl. she's to important for him for me to even think of disliking her and further more she's such a good kid. you shouldn't be so selfish. you love him but you hate his daughter... if he would know that he would feel really bad. if he has kept his daughter near him, to raise her it must mean that she is very important to him. it's very hard but you have to do it. help him raise her even if she will start the relationship with you by hating you too. you shouldn't let that show for your sake and your relationship's sake. since you have a son together you should try to make them be friends at least if not really brother and sister. soon you will see that she is not that bad try helping her and your relationship with her father will be better. accept her at least one of the most important things in his life. i know it pisses you of but she does mean a lot more to him than you like. patience. a lot of patience and hope, she is still at an early age and she may begin getting attached to you to like a friend. but this will happen only if you act like it, like a friend and not a mother because you will never be her mother.
good luck
2006-06-28 02:29:39 · answer #8 · answered by placintzica 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like that you dont accept his first child cause that is the only reason i could see that you cant accept her as your step daughter. If you cant accept her, then maybe you needs to find another guy who doesnt have any children cause he will not drop his first born for you.
2006-06-28 02:15:54 · answer #9 · answered by baby_luv 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
learn how to spell please, than ask questions and don't be such a bi.ch your child could end up the same way as the 6 year old somebody asking the same question be nice and try for your boyfriends sake it's his child u talk about if u love him so much show him how much by being nice don't be the wicked stepmother
2006-06-28 02:21:03 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you love him right? So kids grow to like people they don't liek them from the start but eventually they'll come around. Don't worry about it right now. Marry him if you're ready if not just tell him you need more time Good Luck and Hope i hepled
2006-06-28 02:14:16 · answer #11 · answered by mdwillridge 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋