She has just left the father of her child, has no job and the baby is due any day. She has always felt that she is unworthy and does not make the right choices as far as relationships and friendships. She is a very warm and caring human being, but seems to be somewhat negative at times. I want to help her so that after the baby arrives she can find a job and feel good about herself and maybe one day meet someone that deserves her and will treat her well.
2006-06-27 16:08:01 · 20 answers · asked by Bluewillow 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
You really cant..but you can help push her to realize she is worth more then she thinks. i was 19 when i had my first child..having a child to love..and that loves you back is the best feeling in the world. when she has her baby she will realize how great life is..i was like her..felt useless..unloved..hated..all that...but the minute i held my baby girl for the first time changed everything. It makes you realize you have something and someone to love, live and care for. Just wait and see..you will see a drastic change in her attitude when that baby is here
2006-06-27 16:16:32 · answer #1 · answered by mommy2savannah51405 6 · 11⤊ 2⤋
You have to let her know that no matter what you will always be there for. I know its very hard to be under those circumstancesbut things will looks up for mostlikley. You have to let her know, Look do you see all of those ugly girls on the internet on t.v almost everywhere having babies without their father around and yet still have a good life. Because they have relized that the baby has to eat eventually and it can't do that by them sitting down with it not having money for its nessecities. That she has to get up find a job now and after the babies born she can find a nice respectful young man that will be willing to take care of her child. Because only GOOD guys do that, Let her know that she has the ability to make the right choices as long as she takes it slow and does not rush into things that shes not ready for. Good Luck
2006-06-27 16:48:40 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to start building her self esteem. It is very low. Praise her often...............every time you look at the clock in the house or
some object (visual reminder) praise her and tell her how much you care for her. Help her to see her true gifts and encourage her to use them. Take classes with her on parenting or buy her books on parenting.
Purchase some books on how to raise self esteem...read them and then apply the practices to her when you are talking etc.
Mom, when she holds that baby in her hands for the first time............with a lot of prayer from you, she will realize that she needs to get her life together and be the best that she can be for her new baby..................your grandchild!!! Congrats, being a grandma is a blessing.
2006-06-27 18:20:58 · answer #3 · answered by heartwhisperer2000 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The man your daughter left proably told her she was unworthy and she thinks she feels that way. But tell your daughter that you will always love her and help her with the baby. Find her group that have women who has gone through the same thing and they can help her through this odeal.Before look for someone esle get herself and take care of her baby.
2006-06-27 16:27:24 · answer #4 · answered by cmaymay26facaringperson 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give her time soon she will have a reason to live for.....she will understand what a mother like you are really like. tell her others have it worst , no mother and no one to love her....tell her ..i was 16 years old when i got pregnant, and a abusive baby father..i finish high school i finish college...and today i have a good job....my son married and gone..and now...i have a five year old again with an abusive relationship....tell her...moms is on her side and me too...i am rooting for her....her baby will only bring joy to her...her baby will listen to her cries when she is afraid to tell moms so moms won't suffer...tell her....I'm 42 years old and i made it and she will too....god has given her a present...her child....then and only then will she understand mom..where you are coming from...tell her ..that there is a woman on the other side of the world...that been there...done that ..and that i am on her side...and this too will pass....
2006-06-27 16:22:09 · answer #5 · answered by gengen 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm...that's always difficult. I think she may be discouraged and sacred right now. I'm 25 years old and I've had obstacles you wouldn't believe thrown in my path, but having the support of my friends and family pulled me through.
Find out what she has a passion for. What would she want to do with her life if money was no option, and she would love doing it even if she does not get paid. Then, get her involved in that and support her. Making achivements, however small, will boost her confidence.
Hope this helps!
2006-06-27 16:16:02 · answer #6 · answered by jaynicolegraphix 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only thing that you can do is to support her decisions and be there for her. Anything that will boost her self-confidence would help. Could she join a group for young single mothers? Maybe further her education in the evenings while you watch the baby for a few hours? I know that furthering my education made a huge difference to my self-esteem. Good luck to you and your daughter!
2006-06-27 16:37:11 · answer #7 · answered by seaofsapphires 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
somewhere she has chosen to believe that she doesn't deserve better & that its not worth trying.
(where did she learn this? who were her examples? some people don't know how to love themselves better if they've never had the proper role models.)
this is a self esteem/insecurity issue.
she must learn/be taught how to love herself in higher, more respectful & nurturing ways (most likely things shes not practicing now or not enough of it.).
when she can continuously, joyously love herself better, she will start meeting people who love themselves better & know how to love her better!
it hard work to become aware, but its always worth it!!!
also remember this: her future relationships will be the example by which her child will grow up to define as "love". don't let that child think that "love" includes disfunction, disrespect, abuse, irresponsibility & pain!!!
(there may be a highly aware man out there just waiting to share his wonderful level of loving & he's just waiting around, tapping his toe, wondering, "where is that highly evolved, really self-loving individual at? she's late!"
so, tell her to get to work!! time's a'waisting!!
2006-06-27 16:31:07 · answer #8 · answered by Silvaworks 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can talk to her but she has to learn some lessons for herself. Maybe when the child is born it will be an incentive for her make smarter more responsible choices. The decisions she'll be making will affect not just her anymore.
2006-06-27 16:14:34 · answer #9 · answered by daljack -a girl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think all parents want to some how take away the pain and confusion from their children but when it comes down to it, it is something only they can figure out themselves. I think your encouragement and support will help her a great deal, it may not convince her but it can't hurt.
2006-06-27 16:28:51 · answer #10 · answered by mia 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋