how do u cope knowing your mom has lung cancer?

Answer 1

Having lost family, I can suggest the following:

1. First, know the prognosis. How long is she expected to live? What can be done to improve her chances of longer life?
2. Know your mother's wishes. This is her life. How does she want to approach this? Is she willing to fight? Does she just want to accept this and settle her affairs and live the rest of her life in peace?
3. See to your mother's comfort and her state of mind first. Believe me, you will have time to dwell on your own grief later. Consider this a healthy postponement of your grief.
4. Accept the fact that sooner or later, we lose our parents. It is a part of life and how we deal with it will be an example to our own children and grandchildren. We want them to live on and thrive, not spend their lives in heartache and sorrow.
5. Create more memories now! Enjoy your time together as much as possible. It is difficult to watch a loved one struggle through hard times, but being there for her, just holding her hand, showing your love will send her off with a feeling of deep satisfaction and leave you with fewer regrets.
6. Say what you've always wanted to say now.
7. Cry. Allow yourself to feel the sorrow, helplessness, even anger at this situation that we have no control over. Grieving cannot be denied. Cry it out.
8. But have hope. Always. Cling to the hope that there is a higher purpose for all things. Hope that the truth is we will be together again with our loved ones who have departed. This is only a short separation. They will be able to see us, visit us and whisper softly to us even though we, in our earthly bodies, will not be able to see them. We will be able to feel their presence. We will be reunited again.
You see, my grandmother, my father and my little boy died within one year. I can't describe the heartache. But I can describe the hope. And I have heard their whispers to me! So joyful, so hopeful, so encouraging! I feel their love. They can't wait until we are together again!
Until that time, please, please, spend your moments together caring, loving, laughing...then weep in dark rooms when you are alone. Have courage, my friend. And always hope.

Answer 2

When my momma got cancer, I remember asking myself the same thing. "What am I gonna do?" Turned to "What can I do". And then I tried to come to terms with what was really going on.
I was going to lose my mom. My son would lose his grandmother. I watched her grow weaker due to chemo...And ultimatley, 5 months later, watched her pass away.

Now..when I look back...these are the things I did to cope...
1. I cried. A lot. But not around her. I tried to be the pillar of strengh for her sake. Crying really did help, although it happened so often I was always exausted.
2. I talked to ma on a daily basis. I learned from our chats what she wanted for herself after she passed. This helped the family immensly when it came to making final arrangements. There were no questions as to what she would have liked.
3.Friends and Family are your number one support network. They are there for you to vent. I suggest that you take the oppurtunity.
4.I realized nothing can break the bond between a mother and a child. My mom lives through me.
5. Take things day by day. There will be bad days. And really bad days. And then a good day will come along and make up for it.
6. Roll with the punches. Its out of your hands. And when you realize that, it will be better for you.
Good luck, hunny.

Answer 3

I am not going to lie and say i have been there before. I haven't, i think the bet thing you can do is put in a lot of activities in your life and have fun with the time you have while you have it. You can never dwell in the past or present to long. Because it is then it will eat you up inside then you will be worse off then what you started to be. I know you may have a lot of pain but if you give it all to god and ask him to relieve you of you problem he will hear you and let you know that he is there no matter what happens. Remember never give up or you will be given up on.

Answer 4

Well that's Tuff ,I got cancer in my left eye and soon will have to lose it really nothing i can do as for you're mom let her know you are there for her but the more you talk about it with her that mite make her more upset ,you know how moms are they don't want there kids feeling bad that will up set her even more its almost a no win thing just be there when she wants to talk she'll let you know moms do that. ps spend time with her doing things that you really want to do for the both of you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 5

My Dad died of small cell carcinoma 3 years ago tomorrow.
When he was alive, it was about him.
I ran interference for him and made sure that the doctors and nurses gave him proper care (do not trust them).
We talked for hours.

After he was gone, I grieved. It never ends but does get better with time. You can talk or pray to them and you will gradually forget the bad stuff. The parts you love will remain in your heart forever.

Take advantage of your time together and pray. I will pray for you. God Bless You and Your Mother!!!

Answer 6

This is very hard for anyone to go through, but especially for a child.

You don't mention if she is being treated for it or if it is past that stage. Either way it's hard to even hear that word...cancer.

Talk with your mom. Listen to her. If she is past the cure time, ask her what her wishes are. Let her know you love her and will miss her. Ask her questions that you want answers to. Hug her, kiss her, tell her you love her. Take pictures with her now. If she's able, do things with her...fun things.

It is not going to be easy. Life isn't easy. If you believe in God, pray. Don't pray for the cancer to be gone...turn your pain over to Him. That is what he is there for. Pray for guidance through this all, whatever the outcome.

Some of my most precious memories with my mother when she was dying was of laying on the bed with her and talking. Talking about everything. How she felt when she found out she was pregnant with me, what she thought of me as a baby, how she was feeling now, where she wanted to be buried and what funeral home she wanted. Even what she wanted to wear. Who she wanted to be with her when she died. We laughed and we cried...a lot.

My hardest thing I had to do was tell her it was ok for her to die. She was trying so hard to hang on because she thought I wasn't ready for her to die (and I wasn't)...but I couldn't let her keep fighting and hurting so I had to tell her it was ok and that she could go and see grandma and that I loved her and always would.

It's something that is very hard to live with and you don't know how you can...but you have to. Talk about it to friends, to your dad or grandparents. Talk to a teacher that you trust and like or a counselor. Talk to a preacher/priest.

I hope your mom is able to get treatment and will come out of this ok. It could be a long road, but hang in there. Prayers are coming your way! Bless you.

Answer 7

Enjoy the times with her, pray, and keep her memory alive in case( and I fervently pray she doesn't!) she dies. Remember the times you had together and the things she taught you. Most of all pray though, it always works, but remember, if it's her time, let her go. ={:::::. I wish you both happiness, no matter what.

Answer 8

definitley talk about it to people, ask the doctors questions, adn make sure family and friends are around..i wish you and her luck