i want to find a church, and meet people who put God first, and participate in my own life?

Question

My question is how do i get over the fear of rejection in meetiing new people?
I understand that i have GOD Iin my Life and Loving Jesus first and learning more of his word, is where i never looked before, I WANT TO FIND A CHURCH a christian group to join and learn and make friends too, I am very empty inside, i am not lookiing for a romance, or husband, yet if a man came along with the same values, and we had things in common i might be iinterested, The problem i have is taking the first step, i am shy, not as young as i use to be and i am overweight, not obese, i just have no confidence, i really want to participate in life again, i have been practically a hermit, and only around people who are different and only need something from me, i want to be around people who value good friendships, and then earn one. any suggestions on how to begin, i have even once picked a church, got ready and then got cold feet, panick attack went home, cried and prayed for confidence.

Answer 1

REALIZE THAT IF IT'S HIS WILL IT WILL WORK OUT. EVERYTHING IS FOR HIS GLORY... NOT OURS... JUST REMEMBER THAT. READ THE BIBLE THOROUGHLY... IT TEACHES THAT A PERSON IS BEAUTIFUL NOT BECAUSE OF THE OUTSIDE.. BUT ACCORDING TO THEIR SPIRIT. THE LORD WILL BE INTERESTED ON YOU HAVING A BEAUTIFUL SPIRIT. IF YOU ARE OPEN AND HONEST THEN YOU HAVE NOTHING TO FEAR. PEOPLE WILL ONLY PICK ON YOU BECAUSE THEY ARE JEALOUS.. EVEN IF YOU ARE OVERWEIGHT... PEOPLE GET JEALOUS OVER TALENTS, PERSONALITY TRAITS, HUMBLENESS.. ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING... NO MATTER WHAT YOU LOOK LIKE.. IF YOU PUT YOUR TRUST IN MAN.. YOU WILL ALWAYS SURELY FAIL.. GODLINESS IS BEAUTIFUL... GODLINESS IS ATTRACTIVE... BEING CLOSE TO THE LORD WITHOUT BEING A HYPOCRITE WILL AUTOMATICALLY DRAW PEOPLE TO YOU... (THAT IS OF COURSE AFTER YOU WEED OUT THE NEGATIVE FAKERS) THE PEOPLE WHO PRETEND... WILL ONLY BE JEALOUS.. THE PEOPLE WHO ARE TRUE... WILL HELP YOU GROW STRONGER... FIND A CHURCH AND START TALKING TO THE PASTOR FIRST AND FOREMOST.. THAT WAY.. YOU ALREADY HAVE A BUDDY.... CALL THE CHURCH ON THE PHONE AND TALK TO HIM AND TELL HIM WHAT YOU FEEL... THAT'S HOW I GOT INTO THE CHURCH THAT I'M IN AND I LOVE IT... YOU'LL KNOW BY THEIR RESPONSE IF THEIR GENUINE...

TRY A PENTECOSTAL CHURCH... YOU'LL FEEL RIGHT AT HOME... (MAKE SURE IT'S TRINITARIAN THOUGH.. NOT THE WEIRD ONES THAT DON'T WEAR MAKEUP OR CUT THEIR HAIR)
BTW... WHERE ARE YOU LOCATED... MAYBE I KNOW OF A GREAT CHURCH...!

MESSAGE ME IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS!

Answer 2

Church is not a frightening thing in the least, especially going for the first time to a Catholic church. You should read up on what the people in the faith you pick do during mass -- at Catholic churches, although it has a community feeling, no one at all is picked out as an individual. If you want to be "lost in the crowd," to get a feel for the community and learn a little about how they worship God, then that's probably one of the easiest things to do! The smaller the town the church is in, though, the more likely you are to be noticed since it may be a tight-knit community. I say go for it, pick a place you don't think you'll be singled out right away (that, honestly, is a very easy task), and just sit in for a mass.

If it's the crowds that bother you, go in right after mass, and maybe talk to a parishoner that's leaving, or one of the clergy (priest, deacon, whatever -- he'll be all dressed up in robes, so he'll be the easiest to pick out =D) and ask whatever you want. Go for it. You've got nothing to lose! And even after all this, if you're still scared, you should go see a counsellor of some sort who will give you better tips on how to approach a situation like this. =) Wherever you go, I trust in God that you will be accepted, because your faith is so strong.

Answer 3

That is a very tough question, as churches are filled with broken people. Sometimes the first people we meet in a church are not exactly the most welcoming. I would hate to have you visit a church, have a negative experience, and then never go back. The church may be composed of 100 people, 99 of them would be so incredibly welcoming and you happen to meet the 1 person that has their own issues.

To reduce the chances of this happening, I would recommend calling the pastor first. Explain your circumstances and inquire if there is a small group that meets outside of church that would be a good fit for you. Then you can start off with this small group, getting to know them and allowing them to get to know how wonderful you are. After you are starting to feel comfortable with them, then you can make your appearance at a church service. Perhaps you can go with someone from your small group. Then they can introduce you to others. Before you know it, you will be able to be active and participate in all areas of the church, all on your own.

Good luck to you and God bless you!

Answer 4

"Maureen" I love people who are not shy to confess they love the Lord Jesus. That is a first step to defeating fear of any kind(including rejection). The Lord has not given us the spirit of fear, but he has given us the spirit of power, and the spirit of love and the spirit of a sound mind. You are not fearful, I don't think you are ~ may be you lack confidence, I don't know. However, what I do know is; if the Lord were to tell you to say something, and the whole world seemed to be against you ~ you would go ahead and say it. Now that's not only confidence, and that's not only courage, it is also obedience.

The victory that we have in this world against whatever we face ~ is the Lord's victory. The battles that we seem to fight, they are not ours but the Lord's. When the Lord overcome, he overcame in us.

After he was raised from the dead the 3rd day, as he was departing he promised us that in the world we will have tribulation, "but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world".Fear not, Maureen, for it is your father's good pleasure to give you the kingdom.

As for finding the Church, don't worry ~ live that to God. God will make a way when it seems there is no way, he works in ways we cannot see. He will make a way for you Maureen. Just keep spending time with him in prayer and also in reading his awesome word. Don't let anything worry you. Be anxious about nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanks-giving let your request be made known to God. And the peace of God which surpasses all understanding will guard your heart in Christ Jesus.

Answer 5

Why don't you find one of those big, non-denominational churches that hold their services in really big auditoriums? Then there will be so many people that you won't have to feel like you stand out and are the only one there who doesn't know anybody. Afterward, they usually have coffee and donuts or something, so just go get yourself some coffee and stand around with a friendly look on your face. Most likely, someone will approach you or at least smile back at you and give you enough confidence to say hi. You can do it ! There are people out there who would love to meet you. Give them a chance !

Answer 6

Look for a spirit filled church...a church that urges you to have a relationship with Christ...and not practice a religion.

Religion is man's way to get to God.

Relationship is God's way to reach man through Jesus Christ.

I will be bold and make a suggestion. Try finding your esteem in Christ and not in the world. (www.dsheriff.org has free tapes on the subject matter. It's an awesome ministry and is located in Durant, OK.)

If you look to the secular world; there will always be someone else prettier, smarter, thinner, taller, better skin, hair or eyes. Our society puts so much on our physical looks; it's really, really sad. God judges a man by his heart and not his appearance.

Find a church for fellowship...and to learn more about Jesus. The rest will fall into place :o)

Answer 7

Have u go agoraphobia? Its where ur scared of going out side. Or some kind of people phobia. I would have thought in churches people would be very friendly. Maybe u could contact the church like phone them asked them about what its like there like what kind things take place. I would say that maybe u should talk to a councilor or a therapist coz it sounds like u have a bit of fear. Why are u scared of being rejected? I think contact the church maybe u could tell the church about ur problem and contact a therapist to help u get over ur fear. if ur having panic attacks u really should get help and see ur Doctor.

Answer 8

Several times I've walked into the service of a church I've never been to before. It's not a problem. One, most of the people there won't know you haven't been there before. Two, they're church-going folks. They're not going to mind at all that you've stopped in. They'll probably think it's very cool that you chose their church to visit.

If you don't want to go in "cold", call the priest/minister and tell him/her that you're looking for a church to attend regularly. They will help you, meet with you beforehand if you'd like. They're very welcoming. They'll help you through any anxiety you have and make you feel welcome.

Answer 9

You will find that the right church will welcome you. Those who know Christ as Savior also know their sin and weaknesses so most or at least many are of a humble spirit. Make sure you test all things with the Word of God though and not just on acceptance or friendship because God is to be central at church not us or our needs. He has promised that if we seek Him first He will take care of us.
Blessings to you

Answer 10

You needn't confidence. You need strength to get over your fear. Pray for forgiveness for being afraid when you know that God is in control and will lead you to the right church (Fear is a sin, you know), and pray for strength. God will give it to you. And remember, good Christians won't judge you. They want to help you and befriend you.