Well I've been pessimist all my life and I was fine with that. 5 years ago I've met a girl and we lived together until she left 2 years ago. Since then my life went down the drain. I think I am obsessed with her and keep on trying to win her back when even I know that's impossible. I tried anti-depressants, another girls, church going, new friends etc. Few weeks ago my dad passed away and instead of thinking about him I keep thinking about her all the time. My life looks so dark that I just listen to sad songs and think about suicide. Is there any other way? Or my life is already gone?
2006-06-27 11:44:37 · 13 answers · asked by fallen_mongol 2 in Health ➔ Mental Health
First of all, your life is far from gone. I've suffered depression off and on for years..medication, no medication, I've dealt with it all. What you need to know is you are not alone in this. There are so many people dealing with the things you are. Break ups are tough and if you were with her three years it makes it even harder. But you will never get better if you don't learn to get over the depression.
(the following is from the book "Battlefield of the Mind" by Joyce Meyer. I found it very useful in battling depression.
1. Identify the nature and cause of the problem
2. Recognize that depression steals life and light...it oppreses a person's spiritual freedom and power. The longer it is allowed to remain, the harder it becomes to resist.
3. Remember the good times. Your thoughts will affect your feelings, so think about the kind of things that will help you overcome the attack upon your mind.
4. Praise the Lord in the midst of the problem. Declare what your need truly is...God. Only the Lord can help you feel satisfied. Far too often when people get depressed, it is because they are in need of something and they seek it in the wrong place, which only adds to their problems. God alone can water a thirsty soul. Don't be deceived into thinking that naything else can satisy you fully and completely. Chasing after the wrong thing will always leave you disappointed, and disappointment opens the door for depression.
5. Ask for God's help.
6. Listen to the Lord.
7. Pray for deliverance
Keep your mind on God and not the problem
8.Seek God's wisdom, knowledge and leadership.
Remember, this is a fight. You need to put all of your energy into getting past this. Don't spend anymore time dwelling on the what-if's. While you do that, your life is passing you by.
2006-06-27 12:08:15 · answer #1 · answered by sosassy70 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
There are many other things you can do. I was suicidal not too long ago. It just takes finding a good therapist and the right meds. A therapist is most important. You need someone you can be comfortable with and who will help you work through your feelings. And the anti-depressants you were on must not have been the right ones. You have to understand that there are lots of chemicals in your brain that effect how you feel. A psychiatrist can help you find the right medicine and the right dosage. It's kind of trial and error but way worth it.
Or something simple like exercise can help raise some of the chemicals to help you feel better at least for a little while.
Good luck!!
2006-06-27 11:58:29 · answer #2 · answered by bamagal061 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Where do you want to be in 2wks, 3 months, 6 months, a year, five years? Set realistic goals, and challenge yourself everyday towards meeting them. You can't change the past, you can't make someone love you that doesn't. Acceptance is key for you in a lot of areas. Every morning is a promise, but a gift. Our very lives are gifts. You are very valuable. Look at yourself that way. It's true. You have gifts that you haven't opened, and by not doing so you are depriving the world of knowing your value. Believe, and like what you see. You have talent. Stop looking at yourself through others, and be what you want to see in yourself. I believe you can do this because you want to, or you wouldn't have reached out for the answer. The answer is within you.
2006-06-27 12:00:05 · answer #3 · answered by rann_martin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Medication does help. Sometimes it just takes a while to find the right combo that works for you. I think you need a change of scenery, first of all. Go someplace for a few days and get out and enjoy the sunshine. You've got to dump the sad songs - they only make you feel worse.
We can't make people love us if they don't. The past is the past and it's over and gone. Leave it there. We are responsible for our own happiness, no one else is. It's up to us to make ourselves happy.
It sounds to me as if you are co-dependent. If so, you can learn to change your thinking and turn your life around. A great place to start is with Melody Beattie's book, Beyond Codepenency. It's great and all her books give great advice.
2006-06-27 12:09:01 · answer #4 · answered by valkyria 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Drepession n obsession can get u no where in life. Ur life is going great n then all of a sudden ur life changes cause ur gf leaves u n someone u love dies but that part of life. Who would want drepression in their life. I think ur obsession is due to love sick. You might still be after that girl because you are in love however love is when TWO hearts meet. Remember love isnt life. U cant forget her but she isnt ur soul mate. If u think shes the only one for you, might as well just wait and see whats in store for you. If you guys dont get back together its just fate. But ur new habits r great, make sure u continue to make new friends, n become more social in life then and believe in urself. BEcause *belief* and *trust* is the only way in life.
2006-06-27 12:07:21 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're trying to look for answers. It's not the actual girl you want but what she represents to you. The things you are doing are sending you further down into a hole because you are trying to find magic cures. You need to grieve over your dad dying but don't fear it because it will help you to carry on. You've admitted you're a pessimist so things are not going to be as bad as you think. If you don't kill yourself, you will be glad you didn't. Fact.
2006-06-27 11:57:42 · answer #6 · answered by DGR 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It certainly sounds like you are weighed down . do you want to go forward? you are not a looser you are a looker and what you have found so far is not the real thing needed. try journaling this seems to help , sort out some lingering thoughts and see what value they have for your life . thank you for inviting my words into your private space. have a brave day and look for the sun shine on that cloudy day, every storm passes.
2006-06-27 11:55:22 · answer #7 · answered by writer05 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sad, Depression isn't fun or easy.
Music helps.
Massages help.
Valium helps.
Praying.
On weekends, do stuff just for you!
Take away any pictures or momentos of this girl. They are draining your energy. She's gone. I promise that there will be more if you let her go.
2006-06-27 11:58:00 · answer #8 · answered by Texas Cowboy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
listen suicide is boring plus its messy and then in the end you never get the girl back, one thing we cannot do IS MAKE SOMEONE LOVE US.......IT HURTS, just try to ignore her and her needs, dont let her come to you with all her problems and needs, help yourself first cleanup dressup and go out if it sucks oh well only time and i mean real time cures this I PROMISE
try never to put your happiness in someone elses hands, never works
2006-06-27 11:51:22 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need some happy medicine I kinda know someone like you and the only thing that help them was going in and actually getting help and finding the right medicine to bring them out of that rut.
2006-06-27 11:54:41 · answer #10 · answered by nthny_dms 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋