I don't want to discover the reason when it's too late to have children. I 've been asking people this question for a long time and I haven't gotten a good answer. I love kids and I have a lot in my life, but I don't know if I want any of my own.
Am I a selfish person? Am I overlooking something?
2006-06-27 10:08:54 · 45 answers · asked by nice_eyez 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
This is not selfish. If you don't KNOW you want children, then you probably shouldn't have them. At 25 you still have a few years to think about it, and make up your mind. I am 28 and have no children. I have thought about one day waking up and it being to late, and regretting my decision...but, as of now, I am not sure it's what I want. I think, in this case, its best not to have them.
2006-06-27 10:13:03 · answer #1 · answered by K . 2 · 16⤊ 1⤋
I don't think your being selfish at all. Some people just don't want children. Because you don't have children, in studies you will always come out as being happier than the reproducing populace, while everyone will think you are miserable, funny, right? Children would be the greatest joy of your life, because they would be the ONLY joy in your life, or, at least, the largest by far.
If you love kids you'll probably love having your own. Nothing can bring you joy like your children. When your child looks into your eyes and you know that you are the one person that they need and love more than anyone else in the world, there's nothing like that. When people praise your children you'll feel pride like nothing else and when people hurt them, hate as strong as a god's wrath (Horrid similie, sorry). There's nothing like a child of your own. He or she is a little you, and yet not a little you. You want them to be everything you are and everything you never became. You want the world for your kids, but sometimes you just want to hold them.
And I'm only an auntie.
2006-06-27 10:22:42 · answer #2 · answered by millancad 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I actually don't want kids either. I wanted to at your age but that has changed. I don't feel selfish. I just don't think I want that responsibility.This is a tough world we live in and to bring another person into it just because the world says so is not always the best reason. I have a tough time living as it is (not that i am not thankful for life's blessings).There are some great things regarding having kids like the fact that you are forced to grow up and learn selflessness ( and as you may have noticed not everyone wakes up to that challenge) and of course those special things that kids do and say and the love they have for you. I would quicker adopt and take in someone who does not have parents and a home.
2006-06-27 10:22:40 · answer #3 · answered by celle 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am 48 years old I have 7 children 5 girls and 2 boys ages 31 to 12, even if you are selfish, all the more reason to have childeren, you receive a special kind of unconditional love from children, you never haft to worrie about being lonley, you always have friends , and a support group, I also have 15 grandchildren, and that in it's self is a great reason to have kids!
2006-06-27 10:22:21 · answer #4 · answered by Marion H 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's nothing wrong with that. I often wonder how my life would be different if I hadn't had kids. Enjoy your freedom and don't let anyone pressure you into having a baby against your will. You'll have much more independence, free time, extra money, and privacy. Being a parent means making major sacrifices for the sake of your child and it's not always something that comes easily. If you're not ready to be a parent, then don't do it. And even if you're never ready, that's okay, too. Live your life the way YOU want to...it's the only one you have.
2006-06-27 10:17:01 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that you are selfish at all. Having children is an individual decision for every woman. You also did not mention whether or not you were married or had a serious relationship. Personally, I did not have a child until I was 30 years old when I met my husband. The things we want at 25 are not the same things we want at 35. Take your time. When and if the time comes, you will know.
2006-06-27 10:17:47 · answer #6 · answered by arlenebronw 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm 30 and I have never wanted children. I am still very selfish and I just got married, so I want to be able to do things with my new husband like go out and go on vacation! I think you really have to want them in your heart and I don't think that having kids is for everyone. I figure if I change my mind in the next 5 years or so, I'll still be alright, but for now I can't think of any reason I should have them!!
2006-06-27 10:15:30 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Im not going to give you a reason why kids are great...you obviously just arent into it and that is perfectly fine! It doesnt make you selfish, this world has enough children that were born to parents who have always dreamed of a baby....
There are loads of people who dont want kids and your one of them, no big deal.
Maybe one day you will fall in love and realize that you want to bond with that person in a whole new way..at that point your view may change.....
2006-06-27 10:22:45 · answer #8 · answered by geet840 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tax advantages. You are not a selfish person for not wanting to have children. On the contrary if you had children out of feeling obligated and did not really want them then that would be selfish. That is why the world is such a wonder full place because we are all different.
2006-06-27 10:14:03 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people, like yourself, just don't have that desire. Some also change too. Personally, I've wanted children for as long as I can remember. I want to see my children grow up and live their lives. I want to see my little girl dancing with her first date, I want to see my boy riding his bike for the first time. I want to have children more than anything. Right now, life is getting in the way of that, but I will have children.
The advantage of children is that you never get to see something you care more about than yourself grow up and become successful and knowing you were part of that. I can't know what it is like to create a life and see it grow.
You would be considered selfish, but that is ok. It is better to not make them if you do not want them than it is to make them and regret it.
2006-06-27 10:17:20 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you just aren't ready? At 25 I think it might be hard to tell, depending on your lifestyle. I would think the majority of women DO want children, but there are some who just don't. It's not selfish, it's realistic. If you don't want them, you may not be a good parent or you may regret it if you do have them. No one wants to be a child of a person who regrets having them. Make a wise choice, and if you don't want them, be proud that you knew better than to have them anyway. There are plenty of people in this world who should have made the choice not to have them.
2006-06-27 10:14:55 · answer #11 · answered by TellMeMore 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋