Why do 99% of men cheat? (Why do they bother even getting married??)?

Question

I always knew men cheated, but when I went to work out in Alberta (where everyone was away from home), I was appalled at the number of married men who hit on me. It makes me never, ever want to get married. I even have a hard time trusting in a relationship, because cheating almost seems inevitable. Why do men even bother to get married in the first place?? You hardly ever hear them say anything nice about their wife. (I do paperwork in a construction setting) And once one of them marry us, that's all we are - the wife. We don't even have a name anymore. Keep the wife at home so they can have their hussie while they're away. (yeah, I'm a little bitter)

To the person who argues my 99%. It IS 99% from MY personal history, and I've seen it when I worked away. It was sickening and very disheartening. I have no faith anymore thanks to those men with no hearts.

Answer 1

Let me start out defending men, not all men cheat on their wives there is still some good ones out there who are loyal and loving and are partners to the end with their wives.
I don't know why men cheat, sometimes I think it's a high for them, and half the time if you'd see who they cheat with it may well make your stomach turn. I think men cheat because they are lacking something inside, that they think another women is going to fullfill. It is ashame that they have no regard for the women back at home they married. I'm sure they would not be so happy if she were doing the same thing behind his back.
I know that you are bitter, I've been where you are at. But the sad thing about it all, is those same men go back home to the wife in the end. I don't know how some people have a conscience at times. Aids is still here it has not gone anywhere and so other the other million STDs out there and still people are having unprotected sex and taking it home to their spouse.
I think you will one day meet the right man, you have to just let him know from the start you will not tolerate this in a marriage. I wonder also why people get married and cheat and hurt the person they so call love. But love is a word to many people, people today really have no concept of love. Most people are selfish and self-absorbed and only think of themselves and it's sad. I think men like to be married and have a home to go to but then they also want to hang out and hit on the girls and mess around, they're confused.
But not all men are dogs and like I said before, Women who are mother's with boys need to start teaching our sons early about how to treat a women and about trust and love. We have so many boys who see their own mothers being used and abused by men, who are suppose to be role models, that are sons are repeating this behavior, because they think it's normal when it is not.
I would be pissed at those men also, but don't hate all of them.

Answer 2

dear bitter lady,

men have a need for sex. some more than others. men also have a need to belong to the group.

I was married and in the military. I was sent to Thailand for 12 months without my spouse. Everyone was there without their spouse and 95% of us were men. Some single, some married, and I'm sure some were engaged when they arrived.

it was 1976 and sex was fun and the Thai ladies liked it just as much as we did and were willing to spend the night for five US dollars. That meant I could get laid 20 times for 100 bucks. It was worth every penny and I had a blast. Finally a place where I could have sex as much as I wanted, any time I wanted and no strings attached. I never wanted to leave.

Now, was it my idea to go run the bars and chase the girls? no. so why did I do it? because everyone was doing it and I wasn't going to be the weird one. Nobody was going to call me pu$$y whipped. not me. In fact, I'd take two home just to show off.

They aren't looking for a long term thing, they are looking for sex. If they want a long term thing then their marrage is over already and they are looking for Mrs. Next.

Sorry you were brought up your way and can't accept it for what it is. a release.

KJ

Answer 3

I'm in the military and see cheating a lot - we're talking all the time here - because of distance and separations. I am married, and I just told my husband - if you cheat on me, you don't love me so just do me the favor and tell me before you sleep with someone else. We've been married 2 years and it hasn't come to that, but I believe that our success has been in part of 2 things: 1) We are physically attracted to each other and lust for one another, and 2) Our communications are always open - even if we yell and scream, we've evolved to a level that even though we may be mad, it's never even threatened that it's the end of the relationship. I'm not ashamed or embarrassed to say anything to him or do anything in front of him. I think if one of those 2 things was to disappear (especially the attraction thing ... that goes away with age), we'd have issues with cheating as well. Don't marry him if you don't trust him!

Answer 4

Sorry you're so bitter. If that makes you feel better, fine. Otherwise, get over it; it simply isn't true that 99% of men cheat.

Maybe you've just fallen in with the wrong group of men. Some places are simply more likely to attract that kind of guy. And, some women to that, too. I certainly don't know anything about you, but is it possible that a little self-examination could show how (in spite of yourself) you place yourself in positions more likely to attract the wrong kind of guy?

I've known lots of men who were totally faithful to their wives. and as a man who was faithful but was cheated on by my ex, I also know that women don't always live up to their end of the bargain, either! And, yes; I've had my bitter moments, too.

Good luck to you!

Answer 5

There are some good men out there. I know for sure that I got one of them. In the pass I was cheated on, but I wasn't married to him. But that didn't matter we were together for three years. And crazy me I still stayed with him, until I came to my senses and I left.

The other part is that the men who do cheat on their wives are the ones that are thinking with the brain in there pants. And their cheap excuse is that they don't get enough at home. I swear they can come up with anything that can get them in the sack with another woman. They don't think about what it's going to do to their families. Yes, I do think some men are PIGS.

Answer 6

I feel the same exact way. I dont know why they get married. I swear I think their life would not be complete if they couldn't stand around with all the other slobs trashing the wife. I'm bitter too. The longer I'm on this earth and the more I deal with men the more bitter I become. I think its foolish to think that your guy is the one that is different. Dont you think every single one of those men's wives think their husband would never do that ?

Answer 7

It's not 99%. It's not near 99%. And actually, studies show that a married woman is actually more likely to cheat, given the opportunity than a married man.

Don't generalize all men just because you're jaded by what you see around you. Maybe you need to place yourself in better surrounding and around better people.

Also... sorry to say it... but when you ladies meet a guy that actually is nice, and treats you well, you have a tendency to exploit and/or ignore him in favor of the 'dirtbags' that you're describing.

Answer 8

I'll say 95% of men cheat you have some faithful set out there but wonder men cheat for many reason but you can't let that upset you to the point you don't want to get married you just may get a faithful one

Answer 9

Good question and I wish I knew
I feel like the lone ranger
19 years and not even once
I never cheated on my girlfriends even when I was a kid
men are scum but I have learned most woman cheat too, they are just more discreet and harder to catch.
My mom
step mom
1st wife
all girlfriends
and my sister
all friends wives
all have cheated
so has my wife of 18 years

Answer 10

You're not telling us the whole truth. First, you're a very beautiful young woman; second, either you, personally, or some people who are closed to you have been cheated on. However, not every man cheats, but most women are after the cheaters. Very often, looks is deceiving; therefore, before you tie romantic relational bonds with someone, you have to make sure that you check out his beliefs, principles, and past.