Do you believe in spanking?

Question

If so have you ever spanked one of your kids? Why?
If not, how do you discipline your kids?

Answer 1

Yes, I believe in it. However,

it depends on the personality of the individual child, as they grow.and develop.
if you are firm and consistent with them when they are as young as 1, and begin with the "No"'s and what ever else you are teaching them in simple terms, the need to spank is not near as much an issue, as if you let them run amok of any disciplinary words or actions.

My son was so tenderhearted even at 2 years old, if I raised my voice while I was talking to no one in particular, blowing off steam, he would cry! Needless to say, his personality did not require spanking.
Now, he's nearing 16 and he's a handful. So you need to think about that also.

My daughter needed reinforced time-outs, she was stubborn.
She's 17 this week, and she's a real handful.

But in extreme examples of misbehavior, usually if it was something I didn't want them to ever do again because they would get hurt, then I would send them the message with a spanking, and only 2 swats on the behind.

So possibly, in not spanking them except in rare instances of extremely serious situations, we possibly were not doing them any favors.

It certainly was a very difficult time for me, as I ended up raising them most of the time by myself. And there were many many times I regretted not having spanked them more than we did.

So, it's a mix of the child's personality, and the degree of strictness to cut off at the pass, any advance of misbehavior, smart-alec ness, or whatever will come up as they mature.

Answer 2

yes I do and yes I have spanked my daughter. I don't use it for every little thing she does, but for the "major" issues. It doesn't work if it is overused. And for most kids, you only need to spank them once or twice and then they get the idea. It shouldn't be so hard that it bruises them, but a swat on the bottom is okay in my opinion. I always give a warning first, too so the child knows that if they don't change their behavior they will have the consequence. Everyone feels differently about this - you will form your own opinion in time. I also use time out, lose of priveldge, etc as consequences. It is not my only discipline. I also use positive praise and rewards - I think hearing you are being good is as important as being told you did something wrong.

Answer 3

yes i do and i have done it but not hard just a spank on the butt enough to hurt pride then anything and my daughter does not love me any less she still hangs on my side. I grew up with spankings and u know what because i had disclipline not too severe i grew into a person who respectes the law and rules kids now who have not been treated like that let me tell u i drive a school bus and those kids have no respect they cuss at little kids flip people in cars the finger etc,... all i can do is write them up but most of them get grounded or something and then turn around and do it again because the punishment is nothing to them so i guess it depends on each persons belief on the form of punishment and as long as u don't beat your child hit in the face or hit hard enough to leave bruises then yes spanking is ok in my book. :)

Answer 4

howdy, i just turned 17 and i don't know how much this helps but i think spanking works if you have a good follow up. My mom did spank me when i was little. hard. though it sucked then, i like the way I turned out. make sure they know and understand why they got spanked. I think it builds a lot of character. some say its abusive but i don't see another way to it. I think time outs are generally stupid and uneffective. Spanking is an immediate consequence and isn't that what you wanna teach? actions have consequences. as kids especially in this day and age, kids can't graps that understanding well. so I think physical action has to be taken. They'll remember it. and even if they dont understand why they got hit, they'll get it as they mature but they'll stop doing it when they're young to avoid getting spanked. That's the way I see it. My mom spanked me and some people think its abusive. I dont think so at all. as I said, not to be conceited but also my other friends who have been spanked thank their parents too. We turned out well. we don't talk back, we dont stay out late, personally I haven't touched/tasted/tried and illegal substance nor have I even taken a sip of alcohol. If you DO do it, don't forget to make sure that you care about them. for example, after I got spanked, my mother would come around a fewminutes later to check if I was okay. peace<3

Answer 5

Yes, I have and I will again for sure. I use it as a last resort, and only on the clothed butt with an open hand. I USUALLY only do it if I see one of them doing something dangerous, or that might hurt someone else, although, I have done it for being a smart mouth...etc. I also put them in the corner, but that is only a temporary fix. Spanking them gets their attention real quick, and the next time they try to do what you spanked them for, they are going to remember that you spanked them for it, before they are going to remember that you put them in time out! I always give them hugs and kisses after, and make SURE they understand why they were spanked.

Answer 6

Absolutely not! Spanking is hitting, and hitting is one of the greatest forms of disrespect you can show another person. Think of it this way: if you were shopping in a grocery store, and you saw another shopper open a package of potato chips, eat some and then return the open bag to the shelf, would you go up to that person and hit them? Ok...you can argue that the person is not a relative--or someone that you're responsible for. Take the elderly for example. If you were caring for your grandmother and she got obstinate with you about taking her medication. Would you belt her upside the head for refusing to take it?

Hitting sends so many wrong messages. Why would you inflict pain on someone you claim to love? It doesn't make sense. One minute you're protecting them from all the dangers of the world and the next you're beating them into submission? Not my cup of tea.

When I say no to my son, I mean no. If he ignores my command, he loses a privilege, a toy or a favorite movie. I don't believe in standing in the corner either. That is simply a shame tactic.

You want good kids, use the golden rule when parenting. Common sense and "treat others as you'd want to be treated" will take you further than any gesture motivated by anger or rage.

When in doubt, remove YOURSELF from the situation. Take a breather and come back when you've got a clear head and can attempt to understand why your child did what s/he did. Children are not evil little beings--they're just innocent little people looking for answers.

Good luck!

Answer 7

I believe that spanking should only be used as a last resort, or in an emergency, such as a child is about to touch the burner on a stove and you slap their hand.

I believe that time outs, losing privlidges and talking should be the first three things that are tried. I do know that some kids don't respond to those things and only respond to spankings though.

My mom beat the **** out of me for the dumbest things when I was a kid, and I rebeled and hated her for years.

Same with my husband. His stupid mother had a nasty habit of slapping him in the mouth so hard that his lips and gums would bleed, and he wasn't exactly the model teenager. Of course, that wasn't all that she did wrong, but you get my point.

Answer 8

No, I don't. Me and my siblings grew up with a dad who practiced the iron fist on each one of us and we still did not turn out as disciplined as he wanted us to be. Spanking is just NOT it. The more we got spanked, the more rebelled.

I am a MOM now of a 12 years old daughter. I never have laid a finger on her. Generally, if she displeased me, I tell her that I am not happy of what she did and I also tell her why. I then do not talk to her for a while because I do not want to be able to say hurtful words to her. When I am already okay, I explain further the situation that displeased me and we talk about it.

My daughter happens to be at the top of her class, asks my permission on all the things she want to do and always treated me with respect. And that happened without even a single spanking. :)

Answer 9

I do! I don't believe in those parents who spank there kids for every little thing they do wrong, but i do believe in it. Spanking is my last resort. First there is time out, then there is no T.V. or toys for so long (depends on how old they are) and if they still aren't responding, then I pop them one good time. All kids are different and respond to different things.

Answer 10

Yes I do. They have to know they are wrong. But don't loose it. Then it's fine. Spare the rod spoil the child. I do with my kid and she behave very well after. I give just 1 spank and it's over but she does cry more when I shout to her then spank her. Then she knows ok mommy is really angry now