My kitty is 4.5 years old & she has always been with me, if even to the exclusion of all other life forms. We have formed an incredibly close bond since I adopted her from the pound as a kitten.
But.. I've been practically living with my boyfriend for the past 2 months (50 miles away), much to the grief of my kitty.. & I've been depressed without her. I've brought her with me during the week, but she hates his house & his puppy & she seems sad- she keeps herself tucked away in his basement- she runs when she sees me down there. The (male) puppy likes her.. & she likes large male dogs, but..??
Otherwise, she loves my mother's house (where we lived together before) & she gets "some" attention there, but not like what I could give her. She's all over me if I happen to stay the night at home.. so I know she's not "punishing" me.
I really want her to live with me at the new place. But I hate to see her so sad there, too! :< I need a pet psychic!
2006-06-27 00:35:38 · 10 answers · asked by Realmstarr 4 in Pets ➔ Cats
Please only respond kindly. I report people who respond with needlessly cruel answers. Thank you.
2006-06-27 00:36:14 · update #1
Thank you all so far for your answers. I agree that I should just take her with me whne everything is settled.
2006-06-27 00:47:46 · update #2
I could never leave her completely. It sounds awful and I hate to say it out loud, but if it came down to choosing, I made a committment 4.5 years ago to cherish her, and I would not leave her for anyone, my Love included. He is very sweet to her, also. I couldn't be with someone who refused to love/live with an animal that he knew was very important to me. I just wish that she would be happier with the new situation. I feel awful- the way she stays in that dark basement 24/7 when she's in the new house.. I wish I knew how to make her happy.
2006-06-27 01:58:28 · update #3
By the way, in my profile it says I have two cats- I do- my happy tomcat is thrilled no matter where he is, so I'm not worried about him. Thanks for the emails of concern ;>
2006-06-27 02:01:55 · update #4
you very smart you already told us your answer you just need us to tell you thats the right thing but just remember once its your moms you cant take it back becouse but then your mom and cat would have bonded
2006-06-27 00:40:38 · answer #1 · answered by mr floppy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is stressful for any to cat to move that is why I get to so upset with people that want to "get rid of their cat" they have feelings to and especially if there are new people and other animals to adjust to. I've also learned that sometimes pets will be upset if the boyfriend doesn't like cats but tell you different and when you are not around will shoo it away. That is very traumatic too.
So it depends on how the boyfriend is around the kitty when you are not there. If he doesn't want anything to do with it then I say leave the kitty with Mom. But if he seems to be OK with the kitty then you will just have to give the kitty more time and try enticing her with treats and toys. Put her in a room alone that she feels safe until she has adjusted first and slowly introduce her to the rest of the house and dog. Make sure to leave your clothes (something with your scent on it) or her bed in that room too. She will come around...it just takes patience and time.
Good Luck!
2006-06-27 01:13:44 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She would be better off with you. She may not like your boyfriend's house at first, but after being there for a few days, she'll be fine. I just moved in with my boyfriend (in a VERY similar situation as yours), and it took Madori about 3 days to totally adjust. She was hiding under the bed and would not come out for hardly anything. Now, a month later, she is a normal as ever. She just needs a little adjustment time and support to let her know she's alright there. BUT, leave her where she is if you are going to be going back and forth. Cats prefer routine, and picking her up and moving her every week or two will do damage.
2006-06-27 00:43:16 · answer #3 · answered by ladygodiva0220 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your cat need more time to become acquainted with your boyfriend's house. First of all I think she should really only have one home to be at, so if you have not moved in to your boyfriend's don't keep bringing her. I don't know if this is true for your cat, but my cats hate to travel. Also, if you do move there and bring your cat, make sure to give her LOTS of attention, especially during the first few weeks. Keep her in a quiet room for most of the time during the first week or so. That way she will get used to some of the noises. Slowly introduce her to the other animals.. Just give her lots of cuddles so she knows she's not being replaced!
2006-06-27 00:43:53 · answer #4 · answered by tmac 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should know that your cat really loves you as her human friend part of her family and not just the place. I think you should keep the cat with you, event if she doesn't like the place so much, and try also to make available a minimum comfort for her : space, food and water coin of territory, litterbox, a cozy little place for resting and 2-3 simple toys, home made, and you should try to improve it day by day, as little as you can.
She will finely get used to the place, provided that it satisfies her basic needs. And if she talked, she would tell you that for a kitty it's you that counts. Of course, I don't know details, but that's what I think...
2006-06-27 00:45:25 · answer #5 · answered by me me 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When we moved house our cats hated it but in time they settled and now are as happy as they were previously. Then I got a puppy! They hated that too but now they all get on, infact one of my cats plays with the dog, they chase each other round the house, its pretty funny. I am sure your cat will adjust and I bet she hates being left behind without you no matter how independant they are.
2006-06-27 00:40:53 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The cat may be more intuitive than you about the new situation not being good; and if you continue on this path then it's probably best to leave her at your moms. She will adjust and hopefully get a lot of love, which she needs.
2006-06-27 00:42:38 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sure your kitty would rather be with you. She just needs time to adjust to her new surroundings and playmates. Be sure that the dogs play nicely. They could seriously hurt one another.
2006-06-27 01:02:50 · answer #8 · answered by bookfreak2day 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i imagine it will just take your kitty time to adjust.. its a new place.. new smells.. new people, other animals..
just let her take her time to adjust and than once she's ready and comfortable she'll be back to her old self
* and try not to let the puppy bug her too much*
2006-06-27 00:40:47 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if I was your kitty, I wouldn't be happy in that environment either.
2006-06-27 00:40:46 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋