How many Fundamental Christians does it take...?

Question

....to screw in a light bulb?
10 points to the best punchline!

Answer 1

Well first they gotta see if the bulb screwing will delay the "Rapture", then upon determining this, the fundie pastor will tell the television cameras to send 3 million dollars to him cuz the "spirit-UH" told him to.

Then after asking the president, (who after all these years is still reading the Bible. FINISH THE BOOK ALREADY!) they'll split over the issue about wether or not the light bulb's creation can be explained by intelligent design.

Then when the bulb "sees the light" they'll tell it that Christ wouldn't use light bulbs because Satan was the Light Bearer, then the bulb will get screwed in by an illegal alien about a second after Congress stopped debating on the "same bulb marriage" issue.

Answer 2

One to decide the light is indeed in need of replacement a dozen to determine that he is wrong and form their own light worshiping sects with minor variations on the type of bulb. One to preach how changing light bulbs is against gods plan. Three to make the rest look like idiots, and one to finally say **** it and screw in the damned light bulb so the rest of them can come out of the dark.

total christians offended: 18

Answer 3

Being a fundie myself, I never quite figured out how to get myself and my husband inside the light bulb to "screw". I much prefer the kitchen or the bedroom any way so I guess I'll never know. :o)

Answer 4

it doesnt matter how many of them there are they'll all just pray for it like retards to be screwed in and at the end of the day nothing will have been achieved

Answer 5

None... if God wanted us to see in the dark He would have given us better eyes.

Or

None.... Fundy Christians don't do anything with the word 'screw' in it.

Answer 6

1


*screws in lightbulb*

Answer 7

6,705 - One for each group yet without the light!