Do you ever get over the death of your Mother?

Question

Tomorrow is my Mothers birthday, she has been gone over a year now, and I miss her very much. Should I aknowledge her birthday even though she's not here?

I would like to personally thank everyone who responded. I am overwhelmed by your kindness. Thank you.

Answer 1

My mother passed away when I was about 20. I never did get over it but you learn to live with it. You have to go on with your life. Your mom will be smiling at you when she knows that you are happy and successful. You can be with her every time you think of her. On my mom's birthday I make her favorite dinner and think of things that we talked about and did together. I always keep her memory alive. She is in my heart forever. It will hurt all over again everytime you want to share with her. I had a son and cried my eyes out for my mom because he will grow up with out his grandma, Noni, as we call her but when he asks I will tell him that she is always with me and some days I hurt and some days I smile because I remember how blessed I was to have the best mom for 20 years. Please cry often. It's part of your healing. Love Donna

Answer 2

Yes you should, by all means! My mother died four years ago from cervical cancer, and every year on her birthday, I light a candle and let it burn for 74 minutes. Why? Because that's how young she was when she died, and though I think of her every day, I think of her rmost during that time. That's how I honor her memory. Try that and see what happens.

To answer your original question, no, you never get over it. What you can do is just remember all of the good times you had, what she said to you, sometimes you might even hear her voice.

Answer 3

Sorry for your loss. Believe me when I say I understand your feelings. Things will get easier with time. My mom has been gone now for 26 years and I was 17 when she passed. I still tend to get a little upset around October every year. But, I just say a little prayer and tell her happy Birthday, tell her how much I miss her and go on about my day.
I don't think it would be a good idea for you to keep celebrating her birthday. However, it would be nice to take flowers to the cemetery (if this applies). Please don't worry, things will get easier, I promise. GOOD LUCK!

Answer 4

First off anyone who still has their mother does not know how it feels. My mother died in 97 and my father in 98. You never get over it you just learn how to live again. I still miss my parents a lot. I still think of them on their birthdays and any other day. Neither of my children was able to met them but I tell them about em all the time. So no you will not get over it. But you will learn how to go on without her. Just remember that she will always be with you!

Answer 5

I would celebrate her birthday in some way. I lost my mom 5 years ago and I lost my dad 6 years ago. I still miss them very much but time does make it better. I wish my mom a Happy Birthday each year.

Answer 6

It's not easy. I still Have my Mother but I lost my father 14 years ago at the tender age of 17. Oh yes, wish her happy birthday. Just because her body is not here doesn't mean her spirit isn't. I wish my father happy birthday ever year. I also talk to him mostly everyday. Don't forget about her. Keep her in your heart. Know that she loves you and is watching over you. You have to remember to go on with your life. But also remember that going on with your life doesn't mean forgetting about her. Wish her a happy birthday and celebrate her.

Answer 7

I am going through the same thing now. I lost my mom in December just four days after her birthday. I think you should do whatever is going to make you feel better that day. Email me I would love to hear about your mom. Pay no attention to those insensitive people who probably still have their moms. Unless they walk a mile in these shoes have no idea how intense the loss can be. Remember that she would want to see you happy so try and make a difficult day a good one. Maybe you could do something positive in her honor. Your in my prayers.

Answer 8

I am so sorry for your loss. Yes. acknowledge her birthday and any other special days you shared with her. I lost my mother to brain cancer last year. She was 66. I lost my dad a few years ago.A massive stroke. He was 67. I believe the spirit goes on. Death is not final.Love is forever. I feel my parents love and support all around me. My Dad's Birthday was May 16th. He was my world. And after seven years of him being gone I still celebrate his life and memories. As time goes on the pain lessens and the memories are sweet. My heart goes out to you. Give yourself time. And set aside a private moment to acknowledge her birthday. Take care.

Answer 9

First off, do you really think she's not here?

My mother has made three appearances after her death.

The first was in the car ride to the hospital after they had told me my mother had taken a turn for the worst. I heard her voice (and smelled her perfume) saying, "slow down. I'm already gone. Don't kill yourself getting there to be with your Dad."

The second and third time were both in near death experiences. In the moments after each situation, I was overcome with the scent of her favorite perfume.

I frequently go out to my mother's gravesite and talk with her.

Just because she's dead doesn't mean she's not with you. Keep her memory alive. If you miss her so much, she probably misses you.

Answer 10

Ignore dan, I would acknowledge her birthday. There is nothing wrong in it. It takes a long time to get over the death of a mother, and I don't actually know if you ever do get over it, Hopefully someone with more experience will have more insite.