I confess that I just ate two full sized walnut brownies and was going for a third be4 my conscience stopped me...I fear the calorie godz are angry at me again...and are about to smite me in the thighs and buttocks....on top of this ( OH the shame of it all!! ) I went out to jog and made it about 3 blocks and came back home...
and here I sit in diet purgatory....about to take a super sized dose of saccharine to ease my guilt pangs....should I do sit ups now for pentance or should I arise in brazen rebellion and proceed down stairs to seize another brownie...un repentant soul that I am ? plz advise....and plz pray for all you saints as well
2006-06-26 16:06:49 · 14 answers · asked by ? 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
SEE U CANT EVEN JOKE WITH THESE GUYS..THEY R SOOOO NASTY AND DREAD FILLED...THE GRINCH AND SCROOGE AND OSCAR THE GROUCH HAVE RETURNED...ALL IN ONE....LOL
2006-06-26 16:40:01 · update #1
Your penance, my child - is to do the Stations of Sweat at the church of Curves and eat tofu on Fridays during bikini season. Throw in a Pilate's session for assured entry through the golden gates - (they are narrow)
2006-06-26 17:04:23 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
THE BROWNIES TOLD ME THAT I should try and answer all your questions. They told me I would be known as Saint Reading, and that reading is dangerous, and that you are the most dangerous person to read on this planet of things.
But forget about your thighs and buttocks --the saccharine is the real Devil, and it is entering the folds of your brain. This is why you are feeling so weird --it explains the shame. I advice you to find the Walnut Tree, to ask him to give you the Golden Walnut. That rare item shall protect you forever against the trixxy walnut brownies.
My advice to everybody else in here is to look out for this sinner, and to help her. SHE IS ON A QUEST.
2006-06-27 18:44:23 · answer #2 · answered by reading_is_dangerous 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are guilty of what you consider the sin of gluttony
you ask me an atheist what i advise? what if you just ask yourself what you gained by jogging the three blocks, did that work off the calories
what religion caused you to feel guilty about eating brownies
what god do you think would feel you have abused his temple
why would this god require you to do physical pain to redeem yourself, you just said you jogged, why not do the sit ups to benefit yourself
do you care what i have to say or is this just to suggest that i as an atheist don't care about your sin
2006-06-26 23:27:43 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ummm, soooooo, yer saying you're a fat lazy slob and you like that way?
Seriously, maybe you should give up the brownies hon. It's pretty bad when you start LIKING the bad things about you.
2006-06-26 23:10:39 · answer #4 · answered by arewethereyet 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Were they hashish brownies? Your question makes no sense. Atheists don't believe in sin, saints, or purgatory. Have another brownie...
2006-06-26 23:11:00 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Where are your imaginary friends? Did they desert you in your time of need? (or is that dessert you....)
You should open a fifth of Jack Daniels and drink it until you wake up tomorrow wondering what happened to the truck that ran over you.
2006-06-26 23:25:29 · answer #6 · answered by Left the building 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think a spoonful of castor oil is your punishment for gluttony. :) As for sin, it is afigment of your imagination. To religious dolts, anything good is sin.
2006-06-26 23:13:33 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
now i want a brownie
2006-06-26 23:26:16 · answer #8 · answered by yosef 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
heh pangs
2006-06-26 23:09:25 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's no such thing as sin so no, I can't help you.
2006-06-26 23:08:59 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋