How do you deal with a sibling who has a personality disorder?

Question

My sister has been diagnosed with Narcissistic Personality Disorder. How do you cope with the stress of dealing with anyone who has a personality disorder? I'd like to cut her out of my life completely, but it would mean not going to family events and not seeing my neice.

Answer 1

That is a tough one. They are so self-absorbed and take everything they can get from everybody, and do not care at all about what the ruins will be. Just be nice when your with her and thats it. If your not living with her you should be strong enough to deal with it. My bf had that OMG it is horrible to live with, unbearable. They suck the life out of you and it is not enough, they want more.

Answer 2

Avoid her as much as possible, detach from her and her problems, and only see her at family functions because you don't want to lose your relationship with all of your family just because of her. Don't buy into the idea that everything is all about her. Claim your own place in your family and make your own voice heard. Can she get some help for this disorder, by the way?? If she does, maybe things will get better.

Answer 3

depending on the degree of her disorder and how it manifests itself.If it causes more tension and strife then you have to decide which you cad deal with easier.personality disorders usually do not get better with age.IF it involves compulsive lying which is done to make her feel more important(but you can do nothihg about) and creates conflict within the family and at group get togethers then there is no reason to sacrifice everyone's life for hers.you may have to decide if it is worth it or not because you will not be able to help.depending on how many people she hurts you may be an enabler.examine all the pros and cons and have a visit with a counselor.

Answer 4

I know it must be difficult for you...but think how much more difficult it must be for your sister. It's an illness, just like diabetes, cancer, and other conditions. I have borderline personality disorder, Bipolar, and OCD!! I am doing pretty good! I take my meds every day and I go to counseling. I "choose" to treat my illness....some people choose NOT to....people with personality disorders are not freaks or weird, they just need love and support from their frineds and family. Educating yourself and your family about the illness truly helps!! Also there are support groups for family members who have someone in their family that is mentally ill. Yes, it can be stressful at times, but she needs to know that at least her family didn't give up on her. Good luck!

Answer 5

I had a grandma who had this and when I lived with her...it was quite hard to deal with and is why my grandpa never came home from a business trip relatively early in their marriage. But if you have to just see her at family occasions/short phone calls then I would say find a way to find it humorous. For example my grandma had this way of turning the best news into horrible news......or hating everyone I would introduce to her. So eventually I started enjoying telling her little bits of information because she was so ridiculous. If it is avoidable don`t laugh in her face. When I introduced friends to her...i would explain my grandma to them...ask them to be nice and we laugh going back home. Everycase is different but if you can find what she does humorous it helps.

I would not volunteer to help her do anything...since she would degrade me when I helped her. I did not share information which would get me emotionally rilled up. I stayed at a healthy distance.
Also try to not insult her if it is possible...since this can stir up ridiculous emotional reactions quite unanticipated. But that will get you through...also lots of smiling and nodding when she tells her wonderful news. Remember under there is someone very vulnerable. But if she is too insulting or it hurts your loved ones removing contact is an ok things to do.

Answer 6

The answer is tolerence. You obviously understand that she's sick, but you should also understand that she cannot control how she acts without medication. Perhaps you should talk to her about how you feel. It's hard for a person with a personality disorder to cope on their own. If she gets help, either from you, or someone else, then it would probably help her a lot. And you! Good luck.

Answer 7

Keep reminding yourself that it's her, not you, that has the problem.

Do you talk to the rest of the family about it? How do they cope?

Is she the custodial parent to your niece? How is your niece doing? I think I'd be concerned about the niece, and want to be there for her. I can certainly understand how you'd want to cut your sister out of your life. I've cut family members out of my life, for years at a time. Sometimes you have to to take care of yourself.

Answer 8

Cross reference this with your parents. Tell them how uncomfortable you feel. Be yourself. You are not a psychiatrist and cannot help her, medically. Stop feeling guilty. This is all about your sister getting well with a doctor's help. Go to family events. Don't punish yourself because of your sister's illness. Have a good time. Tell her how you feel. Ill or not, she should not be allowed to put unreasonable demands on you.

Answer 9

Maybe take urself to her world......think what the reason for her action is maybe it is really worth it to her she didnt ask for this disorder sometimes u just gotta deal ur niece dont deserve not to see you bc of this... dont talk to her unless absolutely necessary

Answer 10

Dope-slap her up side the head now and then. That should help, oorr..........make things worse. A little love and tolerance might even work a lot better.