I have been involved with my bf for a year and a half and we just had a baby 4 months ago. We are getting married this Saturday and I am just now getting nervous. We have been fighting alot lately and he has been saying some really mean things to me, is this normal b/c we are both under alot of stress or do you think that maybe he is having second thoughts???
2006-06-26 11:14:05 · 10 answers · asked by q_t_pie0072003 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
You have to talk to him, only he can really answer this. People don't realize that it takes communication for a relationship to work. More than likely, it's just the two of you being under stress. You guys are going through life changing events back to back.
2006-06-27 07:54:06 · answer #1 · answered by SweetPea 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
An upcoming wedding is a very stressful time for anyone. There is so much to be done, and so little time to get it all done in, and everyone is always so worried about everything going just right.
This is normally one of the most stressful times in anyone’s lives, and add to this that the fact that you have just had a child 4 months ago, it is no wonder that you are feeling nervous and are fighting a lot. This is a lot for anyone to go through at the same time.
Often times a new father starts feeling neglected when the mother now has to split her time between him and a new baby. This doesn’t mean that he loves you any less; this is just a normal reaction to the new situation. These feelings are compounded when you add in the stress of a wedding.
I would recommend that you spend some time together talking about everything. If one of your parents are close by, ask them to babysit for the evening so that just the two of you can spend some time together, in a relaxed atmosphere. But not only talk to each other, really listen to each other. Explain how you are feeling about the upcoming wedding, your fighting, and your new baby. I would almost bet that he is having some of the same feelings and anxieties that you are.
One thing that can help a new couple come closer together is a weekly "date night". Find a babysitter one night a week and spend some time between just the two of you, go out to a movie, go to dinner, or just sit and relax at home and watch a movie. You would be surprised at how much stress this can relieve in a new relationship when you have time to spend on each other and not always on the baby.
2006-06-26 18:49:54 · answer #2 · answered by Paradise Weddings & Travel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have every right to be nervous. With a 4 month old baby you both are very tired and add the stress of planning a wedding on top of that.. no wonder you are fighting.
Ask your finacee if it's just nerves or if he is having second thoughts... You gotta do what's right for you and the baby.
2006-06-26 20:50:06 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its probably just stress hun...especially with having a 4 month old on top of the wedding. I fought with my husband before we married too. I wanted to take over the plans myself and so everytime somethign went wrong, he would laugh at me and i would yell at him and everything would be a big mess. we just kind of didnt talk wedding too much so that we wouldnt fight and then when the big day came all was well. im sure if he was having second thoughts he would say something to you about it.
2006-06-26 20:31:16 · answer #4 · answered by Jenn ♥Cadence Jade's mum♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's probably due to stress of a new baby and the marriage coming up. The two of you need to sit down and have a real heart to heart with one another. That way you both know what is bothering one another and can work on those issues. Good luck and God bless
2006-06-26 18:17:13 · answer #5 · answered by sapphireblaze 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are very normal and the fighting due the stress of the wedding not to mention the baby and you know what the fighting is a sign of caring which is a good thing.
2006-06-26 21:39:09 · answer #6 · answered by vina770 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think you are nervous and maybe should put it off, you seem young and dont know what you want right now, maybe you should both talk and see what he wantstoo. maybe you both dont want to do this and only want to do this because someone is making you do it. dont marry because you have a kid.
2006-06-26 18:24:16 · answer #7 · answered by Christina 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ri9ght before my wedding, I broke out in hives, we fought, and then the during the wedding I shook likea leaf...
and now , 3 weeks later> we are peachy
Just calm down and tlak to him.. and make that choice together..if you do call if off... or postphone it.. just breathe.. happens all the time
2006-06-26 18:29:29 · answer #8 · answered by willowrosenberg77 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Probably a bit of cold feet and stress.....don't worry about it.....just try to stay calm and enjoy your day.
2006-06-26 22:25:40 · answer #9 · answered by bluez 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like cold feet to me...but if you are having doubts seriously sit down and talk to him about it.
2006-06-26 18:52:03 · answer #10 · answered by princessdawn1982 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋