My roomate and I started having sex than we started to develop feelings for one another. So why not just be bf/gf right? Well because I am a porn star. So we decided that we would see other people and just continue being good friends and if we still wanted each other when I got out of porn we would then be together. Well here latley we have become more serious and I am still doing porn but according to him I'm not allowed to see other guys. He only sleeps with one other girl and that is fine with me. I figured if I'm doing porn he has every right to sleep with others as well, even though what I'm doing is for work not liesure. Well, I found out recently he sweet talks her just like he does me and basically the sweet things he does for me he does for her too. Ya know... I figured that sex is a sacred thing between to people and since we can't have that then we should at least hold our feelings sacred for one another and hold each other up hirer than we do others. Fair enough?
2006-06-26 10:49:21 · 14 answers · asked by Dream Bree 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
What is your view on it? What is your advice?
2006-06-26 10:50:05 · update #1
Is this a joke? Intimacy is a sacred thing between almost all couples. To try and have a solid relationship while doing porn movies is like trying to fly without a plane, ain't gonna happen.
No, sex is not love, but sex is certainly a big facet of it.
You "found out" he "sweet talks" her??? What kind of line is that? What's he supposed to say? Hey baby, lets bang? Figure out what is more important to you, a career in porn or a monogamous relationship, until then you will get no real answers, only questions.
2006-06-26 11:00:36 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
Honestly, you should just move on. Being roommates and lovers make it strenuous. Basically he wants to control you so he can have bootycalls when he wants. Sounds like he has it made. So find a new roommate or a bf. Keep the friends/lovers/roomates sepearte until you are married. But I would say get out of the porn industry. Go into modelling or something, even nude modelling. Artists pay good money for nude models. He too should be keeping whats sacred between you and him just that, and he isnt, which means he is sleazebag material and is likely to cheat on you when you are together eventually. Most studies show that when a person becomes controlling and demanding in a relationship, it often leads to violence. Get out of it girl.
2006-06-28 00:36:30 · answer #2 · answered by crazycanuck7901 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Actions are supposed to speak louder than words. The sweet talking is a precursor to the sex, Its supposed to lead to the act, a form of verbal foreplay. The fact that you are letting his "sweet talking" another girl, whom he is "already" sleeping with, bother you, is well a joke. How do you think he feels knowing you leave him everyday to have sex for money with other men or women, for the world to watch. Of course he's ok with it, he's havin sex with a pornstar. We do not go thru life looking to feel insecure. We guys have egos a.k.a. feelings, they get hurt, our hearts break, our confidance shattered. A girl can tell if a guy has a girl in his life, we shine, we hold our heads higher, and they can smell it on us. Perhaps he is preparing for the inevitable. A woman can make, or break a man. But it will be a cold day in hell before we let you know it. So we look to compensate, typical male reaction, its how we cope. If you value what you have with this guy, then this girl is a threat to you. She can give him what you can't, piece of mind. So the question is not how confidant you are of this "arrangement"(refraining from using the term relationship), How confidant is he? If he is understanding of your line of work, then why is there another girl in his life. Its obviously sex between the two of you, but apparently has become a little more too you. Can you feel the irony? You're the pornstar, why are "you" jealous?
2006-06-27 22:08:54 · answer #3 · answered by Rafxsat 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sausage is a bit hard (sorry no pun intended) but he's kinda right. Your bloke doesn't work in your industry so there's no "working" sex for him - the concept doesn't exist in his world, he just has to accept your word that this is what it is for you. But that doesn't mean his sex life will be anything like that, nor does it mean he accepts in his heart that yours is.
You have to let him sweet talk - he's never going to have a relationship where he doesn't do that. You may even have to let him go. It's very very difficult for him to be with you because he can't connect with your world. Which brings us round to sausage's conclusion that you might have to choose between your man and your work.
That doesn't mean you're a bad person in any way. It just means you're out on a limb. I guess that's just one downside of the job.
2006-06-26 18:29:21 · answer #4 · answered by wild_eep 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you'd better cut out the extras if you want this relationship to work. having him having sex with another girl will cause damage to your relationship. However, you can hardly expect him to if you're doing porn. My advice, make a deal with him that you'll both stop your distractions, you get out of the porn industry, he dumps the girl, and you two be together.
if not, your "relationship" will hang in limbo. it's not worth having it stay the way it is if you want satisfaction, which i get the impression you do.
2006-06-26 17:58:00 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get out of porn, seek help. I think if you can go have sex he can go have sex, but as for the romantic stuff he kinda is cheating, but with you working in the industry he'll always use that as his excuse. Won't stop until your quit you "acting" job.
2006-06-26 17:54:39 · answer #6 · answered by cisco_cantu 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think if you really see a future here you both need to sit down and talk about the future, don't just leave it hanging. Maybe he's uncomfortable with your profession and feels he can have other g/f's. If so and if he is important enough, maybe its time for a career change. Then again I don't know how pornstars do it, I fall for just about every girl I ****.
2006-06-26 17:57:38 · answer #7 · answered by Big D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is so silly im not sure what to say.
Is this a serious question?
Somewhere your life took a turn for the worse.
You are screwing other guys for cash and you think he is the problem? You are an attention whore. Seriously.
Good night.
You can't have you cake and eat it too.
There.
Cliche of the night.
2006-06-27 07:04:09 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
uh, well i think he does these things for this other girl because he is jelouse that u have sex with other men for a living and with this other woman he is trying to show u that if u don't get out of the buisness he is going to leave u for this other woman.
2006-06-26 17:55:58 · answer #9 · answered by pimpdaddypain76 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my advise is to tell him that . and if he disagrees then it sounds like he is only in it for the sex , and to be able to say i sleep with a porn star.
2006-06-26 18:16:42 · answer #10 · answered by redneack_butterfly_18 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋