How do we stop desiring things?

Question

According to some people (Buddhists, Hindus, etc.), if you become free of desires you achieve everlasting happiness. It's a "catch 22" though, because wanting freedom from desires is a desire in itself. Can anyone help me out?

Answer 1

get a lobotomy. that oughta do it.

Answer 2

Good question.
Its not just about freedom from desires.
Its about realising that this world cannot give us what we want. Just think about it.
Whenever we get something new like a new car, house, wife..it is great. But rarely does that feeling last. No, not even with our partner. Otherwise why are we always being told that you have to work at marriage? Eventually that new thing becomes old, worn out boring and we feel suffering. Wanting more stuff only brings more suffering. Even our partners leave us when they, or we die and that brings untold suffering.
Everyone wants the same thing. Happiness and freedom from suffering. But we just keep going about it the same way. Always inventing the best new thing and then an even better new thing. Look at kids nowadays. They have so much more than kids did 20 or 30 years ago but are they any happier? NO.
If you turn inwards and meditate and think about other people you can find real happiness. Giving to others in any way makes us happy.
Yes it is a desire in itself, but it can be looked at as the desire to overcome all other desires for ever.
Try going to your local Buddhist meditation class and see for yourself. Don't worry, they won't press gang you into shaving your head!

Answer 3

The best way to end this problem is to see what are the desires that you can satisfy and which ones you can not. Then once you have made a budget, go to a poor neighborhood and check people what their needs are. Decide whether your budget would be better used by THEM?

Learn to give and make that your desire. Ultimately know that what you want today is like the stuff you wanted yesterday in the Basement or the attic and the money is in the bank account of the happy shop owner out of the bank account of sad you.

Desiring not to desire is the only desire allowed by desirologists.

Good luck... =)

Answer 4

The way to real real understanding is to study the scriptures first.

The Hindu scriptures inform us that we are not these material bodies, instead we are an eternal spiritual soul. The soul continually takes on different bodies, like we change clothes. At the time of death of one body, the soul moves onto the next. God's laws govern such activity. Your desires and actions will have a bearing on your next body/life.

What you describe as giving up desires is often called renunciation. You cannot become free of desires as some as necessary for survival, e.g. desire to eat, breathe etc. However, there are other desires which are produced by the mind, e.g. lust, greed, jealousy etc which are not conducive. The Bhagavad-Gita explains that we have to try to give up material desires and adopt spiritual desires. Only by adopting something pure can you purify yourself.

A lot of Buddhists simply do not believe in God and try to give up all things - sitting idly and trying to meditate on nonthingness - therefore their form of renunciation is simply unproductive.

Chapter 18 of the Bhagavad-Gita is an excellent summary on the topic of renunciation.

To understand more about "giving up" desires / renunciation check out the following links:

Answer 5

Okay, well desiring some stuff isn't bad. For instance, a stronger relationship with the Lord, or a better idea of how to handle difficult situations, or a marriage that will be what the Lord wants for you. Its finding out what isn't within God's will that is bad to desire and then its a never ending battle. We're all sinfull and must pray and ask for forgiveness and strength.

Answer 6

Take a long hard look at all the things you have now, and ask yourself if any of it would matter at all if you found that you have only 24 hours to live. What you will find is that none of it matters, it is all just "stuff"; utterly meaningless.
Now, ask yourself whether you actually need any more "just stuff", and I think you will start to stop desiring things.
Sure, they are nice to have, but they don't actually mean anything.

Answer 7

When you achieve the goal of everlasting happiness, you are free from desiring anything but until you reach that goal, you desire only everlasting happiness.

Answer 8

We stop needing. We look at what we already have and we become thankful for it and want it. U just need to notice all the good things u already have- the things many other people desire- and realize how much u already have.

Answer 9

What's wrong with desiring things? I desire a Pepsi, steak, and a nap.
Seriously though, desire is what pushes us humans to achieve goals in life. There is nothing wrong with that.

Answer 10

That's Zen for you. It's fascinating to study, but not incredibly practical. Most Zen Bhuddists are pretty sure this can be achieved through attaining a blank state of thoughtless consciousness via meditation. I feel that too many people already think too little, so this approach is counter-intuitive for me. Pretty interesting though.

Answer 11

I kind of know what they are talking about. When you learn to accept what you have, what you are given, and who you are and stop wanting for things that you can't gain on your own, you are more likely to find a sort of peace or happiness. I've achieved this for the most part when I'm alone. I'm trying to learn how to do it when there are people around.