who should pay for the alcohol at the reception?

Question

my daughter wants mom to pay for the alcohol and I don't want to and she is upset and says that it is my resposiblility is it?

Answer 1

Traditionally, yes alcohol is paid for whoever is paying for the reception(parents of the bride). However tradition is out the window now a days. Now a days it is more common for the parents of both bride and groom and the bride and groom themselves to chip in for the cost of the wedding. if your daughter is adoment about having liquor at the reception then perhaps she and her fiancee should foot the bill. if they can't afford to help out with the cost of the wedding, perhaps they have no business getting married yet.

Answer 2

According to the "Wedding Etiquette" alcohol is under "catered reception" and the Bride's Family is responsible for that. It didn't say anything about the mother or father of the bride paying for it, it says "Bride's Family"---> http://www.ourmarriage.com/html/who_pays_for_what.html
During the course of the meal, the bride's family pays for the beverages such as water,sodas,wine,juice, champagne
for the cake or whatever you or the guests want to drink during the meal. Now after or before the meal, you could have a bar open that people have to pay for. So if the guests want whiskey or beer or any other type of alcohol beverages, then they'll have to pay for it. There's no reason to have a bunch of drunk folks laying around. It seems to be fair and keeps your costs down. Of course it depends on how big your party is and your financial situation and/or status. Anyway, this is your daughter's wedding not yours, so if she wants something, but is a financial burden to you, then she'll have to pay for it herself or she can have the groom's family help pay for it, or she'll have to make do for what she has.
There's no reason to go bankrupt to plan a wedding you can't afford. It will just make people stressed when it's suppose to be a joyous occasion.
So your daughter will have to make some sacrifice's. A wedding is just a wedding, no matter how beautiful or spectacular or simple it is, it doesn't guarantee the outcome of the marriage.

Answer 3

Well, traditionally it’s the bride’s family’s responsibility to pay for most of the wedding, but other than that, you have no obligation. And today, most people do it somewhat differently anyways. I don’t know your exact situation, but there’s no set rule that says you have to pay for the alcohol. There may be different reasons you don’t want to pay for this part of the wedding – if you’re uncomfortable with paying for alcohol for religious or other reasons, see if you can contribute in some other way. If you simply can’t afford it, tell your daughter so, and offer what you can afford, or let her know that you can’t contribute monetarily. If you can pay for some of it, but your daughter wants an open bar or something, see if you can compromise – have only beer and wine, see if you can buy your own alcohol and bring it in (look for wholesale deals), only serve alcohol for the toasts, and/or limit the time the bar is open. Whatever your reason and whatever you decide, try to be calm and reasonable with your daughter, and keep in mind how much this day means to her. Also, try to let her see that you care about her day, but you have good reasons for not wanting to go along with her on this, and be willing to compromise in some way if you can. Good luck!

Answer 4

There are so many places that offer beverage packages with the reception that makes it quite affordable to provide the alcohol. If you're on a budget, then sit down with your daughter and have her help decide what other things she is willing to give up in order to have a budget for the alcohol. I've been to many weddings over the past few years (mine included), and I think it is really tacky not to provide at least beer and wine.

Answer 5

Traditionally, the groom's parents paid for the alcohol. But, now, most families are splitting the cost. Some bride and grooms are also footing the bill. It gets expensive, so everyone chipping in is a good idea!!!

Answer 6

As part of the reception, it is, but there are other acceptable options for you not to spend all your cash on one day:

-Offer just the champange for the toast. You can offer tea and soda to accompanie the meal.

-Stil too much? Toast with sparkling juice instead.

-Have a cash bar. You can set this up for $500 and ask for $ 1 0r 2 dollars for one alcoholic drink. You can make a small profit or break even by doing this.

Good luck

Answer 7

My grandma wanted to pay for the alcohol at our reception last year - she also paid for my wedding dress, among other things...but our families helped us so much with the wedding and we were so grateful for it...both sides pitched in on everything. It really helps when your families are there for you and willing to do whatever it takes. If no one wants to pay, the bride and groom must pay.

Answer 8

I honestly wouldn't serve alcohol at the wedding. If you live in a very sue-happy state, (California, NY, Florida...Other states) if someone who gets drunk at the reception and drives drunk and kills someone, YOUR DAUGHTER is responsible legally because
1) It's her wedding - Reception site is in her name.
2) I'm guessing on her wedding day, she has to watch everyone else to see who is super drunk.

Weird I know but there have been convictions over this.

Answer 9

Tradition says that the groom's family pays for the bar tab at the reception. But I say, bugger tradition and let the bride and groom pay for it, especially if they're a bit older and have jobs.

Answer 10

From theknot.com:

Bride and/or her family:
Ceremony location/decorations
Reception location/decorations and service
Food, beverages, and cake
Bride's bouquet, boutonnieres, and corsages
Bouquets for bridesmaids and flower girls
Floral arrangements for ceremony and reception
Invitations, announcements, and other stationery
Bride's dress, veil, and accessories
Photography and videography
Transportation of wedding party to ceremony and reception sites

Groom and/or his family:
Bride's engagement ring and wedding bands
Rehearsal dinner
Groom's wedding clothes
Marriage license and officiant's fee
Honeymoon