What did i do wrong?

Question

I know that my mum never wanted me, she told me when i was younger, and maybe i except the reason at times i was a real pain, and i always required alot of attention. I tried hard in school to impress her, but it never seemed to make her feel grateful of me. I left home at 16, as i felt i could no longer be in her way, removing myself from the picture was probably for the best. Sometimes she rings me to see how I am doing, and she can be really nice to me. But if i ring her, she always presume i want something from her, and couldnt careless about what i have to say to her. She is not very supportive, i cant go to her for help or anything and it upsets me?

Answer 1

poor you

Answer 2

You did nothing wrong. Never have... its just she probably was young like you and she didn't use contraceptives so when she had you (her fault and the fault of those giving her lousy sex ed) she could not play, hang out with her mates so much and no more career.

Nothing you did but being born when she was not ready to have you.

This is why babies shoulb be planned.


It's not you she was not ready to have any kids at all.

Wish I could help...


hug hug hug hug hug you better.

You need to leave her and find your own friend and family and hope she comes around... I wish I could say more then that.

Its her not you. If she had a son it would be no different.

This is why sorry Im pro abortion, and so pro sex ed and contraception in young people as the effects of having kids when not ready is all this hurt.

This is why relgion is evil as it stops sex ed and contraception...


So people like you have a hurt life.

hug hug

nothing sexaul just make you better and not so hurt hug.

You can't fix this... you need your own life

Answer 3

It sounds like the problem is your mom. I can't see myself ever saying to my two girls that I never wanted them, and both were a surprise to me. It's very emotionally damaging to say that especially to a kid and for her to do that means that she's got a serious amount of pent up anger.

I don't know if you should just not call her because it sucks not to be able to call your mom when you want to talk, maybe if you talked to her to try and find the REAL reason as to why she treats you that way it will make her realize what she's doing. Maybe she doesn't notice how she is because she's being blinded by all the anger behind her reason for it, know what I mean?

Try talking to her and confront her about they way if makes you feel. I hope it works for you, good luck.

Answer 4

my mother also told me many times that i was not wanted. My two sisters were from the same father and they had divorced. I came along later as the result of a fling with someone she really didn't care about. She was not wanting other children and definatly not wanting a boy. I was treated very differently then my sisters and was taught to be completly submissive to them and my mom. i know how it feels when you say you could never do anything to impress her as I tried very hard to earn Her love and my sisters also but never succeeded. So you are not alone in having this feeling. There are things that we will never have or experience as a result of this. i know your pain

Answer 5

It sounds like it is your mother who has the problem and not you. I'd guess something from before you were born occured (maybe your father was scared off by the thought of her pregnancy? Maybe she was about to embark on something she'd always wanted to do and then couldn't? who knows?!).

Try talking to her and get it all out in the open. Tell her how you feel about her and how she makes you feel. Don't judge her, don't apportion blame, just give her the chance to explain. It's the onyl way you'll ever find out, unless she comes on here and provides an answer.

Answer 6

S.B...

I too have a difficult Mother, I've nt spoken to her for quite a few years!ni did try to ring recently... but she has a forked tongue... she can't help herself... i'm not a big family person myself...

Don't beat yourself up about it... just remind her who will be in charge when she is old!

If her selfishness continues, you could always whack her in the nearest, really dodgy nursing home... Rest assured, this will sink in eventually... it's wether you chose to carry on playing her little game...

so smile love... she really isn't worth your attention... there are many parents that would love to have children... Yours just did not know what magic kids bring...

One thing this has taught you though...

You will never treat Your Kids, with the same contempt...

Good Luck, you are one in a million, just remember that!

Answer 7

This is certainly quite a painful situation. There are parents who cannot bond with their children. Maybe she was unable to have a good relationship with your gran. It's hard but you need to make a life for yourself and find affection and support in other relationships. Be careful though who you invest in emotionally as you don't need any more pain in your life. You may benefit from some support and counselling.

Answer 8

Sorry - some people are like that.... You'll have to go see her - have a real heart to heart - tell her how you feel...

If it doesnt work - Start a new life with people you can get support from... A mother isnt the person who gives birth to you - its the person that picks you up when you fall over and makes things better!

Answer 9

Your mother is a selfish, immature and downright awful person. She has emotionally scared you with the verbal abuse of telling you that she never wanted you. You owe her nothing.
I would cut her out of your life and move on. It doesn't sound as though she has been much of a mother to you anyway and you don't need someone who only gives you negative feedback in your life. Time for you to be a little selfish and protect your life, your goals and your dreams. I wish you a happy and successful life. Good Luck!

Answer 10

U can always count on friends on here or around U.... U could IM me NE time N type U'r heart off F U like..... or e-mail me what ever U want 2 say, I'll B there 2 lend a ear or N this case my eye's. Click on my pic N get my info

Answer 11

OK...first of all there are two sides to every story and we don't have mom's side here, only yours. You only get one mother and you're going to have to put your "needs" aside and just accept her as she is if you want any kind of relationship with her. Be kind and mature when you speak with her; ask how she is doing for a change, don't center everything around yourself. Talk briefly and then hang up. You owe it to yourself to do this and be a bigger person for it. Maybe it will send your mom the message that she raised a great kid. God Bless.