My husband is a mommies boy and it drives me crazy. Im from oregon and hes from Cali but his parents are moving to Tenessee, His mom drives me nutz! She has total control over him pretty much to a point where its frusterating. She told him that shell give us a house on their property in TN, once the babys born so we can live near her. like a five minute walk. she said shell be over everyday. I can stand her that much. Ho do I stress to him that its not what I want. I like her, but I dont think I could put up with her everyday! Shes a drama Queen!
2006-06-26 04:54:22 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Im not "dumping" him for this.. toofacepeople... thats the most ridiculous thing Ive heard.. Im not in highschool.. and were married.
2006-06-26 05:01:54 · update #1
well if i was you i would sit down with them both and tell them that you want your place for you and husband and baby say you dont mind her coming to see you and the baby but not every day be frank with them
2006-06-26 05:01:55 · answer #1 · answered by carolyn m 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have your own life to live. Moving has to be a decision you can both live with. It would be quite selfish of your husband to force you to do ANYTHING with out your complete agreement. You/ HE has to compromise. Anything less than that is disrespectful to you and the marriage. Once people marry dosnt mean he has to sever all ties to his family, but he HAS to realize he also has a new family that is at the very least just as important if not more.
2006-06-26 12:02:30 · answer #2 · answered by momprotect 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like youve got some real trouble!
Youre best bet is just to sit him down and talk to him very seriously. You will have to come to some sort of an agreement with his mother and him. Something all three of you can agree on. Sometimes mums can just be like that, esspecially if its her only child. Even if it means that he goes round to see his mum and you stay at home or something becuase he obviously wants to see his mum. When you talk to him be firm, say that he has to let go of his mummys hand, hes older now and he has a woman to attend to. If you can, try to get him to have a word with his mother to tell her to stop mothering him to much. At the end of the day, Your responsibility lies with your husband and his responsibility lies with you. His mother shouldnt really enter the picture to much, You have to concentrate on your marrige and ignore the people who get in the way, take it one obstacle at a time.
Good luck! Hope this helped ya!
2006-06-26 16:35:36 · answer #3 · answered by scullywag324 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know how old you are or how long you have been married. I can tell you this: based on watching my parent's relationship over 30 years of marriage, as well as that of my mother and his mother.
My father, one of the world's biggest Momma's Boys, at first did very little to balance a demanding mother and a dramatic wife. He kinda stepped back, and I think it was a mistake.
They would have gotten much clearer definitions of who they are in Dad's life if he had stepped up and mediated through the first few "incidents".
If your man isn't willing to do it, you must do it yourself. You may have to "train" her on how to treat you (you have actually already been doing this). That means if she exhibits behavior that infringes on you, let her know. Also, read Dale Carnegie's How to Win Friends and Influence People. I've got it on cd. It is really helping me with my relationship with my own mother and also with my daughter.
2006-06-26 12:35:09 · answer #4 · answered by ny c 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stay where you are! Do NOT move to Tennessee. If you do, you'll go back to Oregon before long.....just you and the baby, that is. Your husband, which is apparently still nursing his Mother, will stay there in Tennessee, with his Mommy. Good Luck!
2006-06-26 12:01:22 · answer #5 · answered by olderbutwiser 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
let hi m read this ...... " a daughters a daughter all your life " but a sons a son till he takes a wife " so let go of mama !! on the other handif they put the house in your name i'd go for it ! if it dont work out at least you can sell the house and use that money to take care of your kids and self , also you should be happy to have the help of someone else to watch your child , its not easy having children and maybe shes trying to help
2006-06-26 12:06:05 · answer #6 · answered by transplanted 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
try talking to her and your husband about how you feel
tell her politly and calmly that you do not want her to come over every day as you need your freedom and to live your life and be able to bring up your child how you want to
let her know you will ask her for help and advice and will appreciate it when it is needed
if you are to move so close to her you will need to work out some ground rules so she feels a part of her sons life and grandchilds life as well as yours without making you feel smothered and crowded
i hope you are able to work this out
2006-06-26 13:16:52 · answer #7 · answered by mumoftheyear 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you told your husband that you don't want to move? He should consider your feelings and you need to find a compromise. You also need to tell your mother-in-law about your feelings, gently but firmly. If she refuses to accept it repeat yourself again and again until she gets the message. she has no right to tell you what to do, or where to live. It's up to you to make your feelings known.
2006-06-27 09:34:35 · answer #8 · answered by Fluorescent 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sit down and talk to u hubby and tell him nicely how u feel...if that dosen't work then family councelling might be a good option
2006-06-26 11:59:05 · answer #9 · answered by Angel T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just try sitting down and talking to him about it.Tell him the truth about how you feel.There is one good thing about a mommas boy, they make great dads.lol
2006-06-26 11:58:35 · answer #10 · answered by Alana 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋